I had very similar feelings for a while, and it’s only fairly recently that i’ve decided that i do in fact want top surgery (several years now into identifying as trans.) I haven’t started taking T yet, though I plan to soon in the future. for me, what I realized is that I liked the way I looked with breasts from an abstract aesthetic point of view but I didn’t feel connected to it. and like Estradoll, my experience with this stuff has changed throughout my experience of being trans. ofc this is just my own experience and idk how things are for you exactly. top surgery is definitely not required to pass as a man :)