cat-trans

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    • ashinadash [she/her]
      ·
      5 months ago

      By other cis people, all the time. Just because you don't have an anecdote doesn't mean it doesn't happen - cis women can have strong jaws or thick facial hair or thin hips or wide shoulders. They can have PCOS and abnormal testosterone levels. It happens now and then. How else could masc women even exist? And that's before cis women started kicking eachother out of bathrooms. You have not been around enough if you've never seen it.

    • Babs [she/her]
      ·
      5 months ago

      edit: this was bitchy and grumbly. But it's fair to want to compare yourself to your peers and siblings, and this notion that you should only compare yourself to the most masculine-looking women out there, the few who get misgendered, rubs me wrong.

      • ashinadash [she/her]
        ·
        5 months ago

        The point is more that passing is stupid and arbitrary and being brainwormed about it certainly doesn't help. Calling people "delusional" for saying that cis women do not always look like women, is itself out of touch with reality. Plus, comparing yourself to others, specifically cis women is usually a road to brainwormed shit.

        Nobody is saying "only compare yourself to the most masc women", ffs.

        Comment by sneak100:

        [...] the point is that the finish line is bullshit. A trans woman would have to put a tone more work, maybe even expensive surgeries to "pass", but if they do pass, they do it in the exact same way as a cis woman. A cis woman who also has to do a tonne of work to achieve this same standard, because it's unrealistic and harmful to everyone.

    • magi [null/void]M
      ·
      5 months ago

      I used to work with 2 cis women who were misgendered they would never pass in society. They were both married also...

      You need to calm down and occupy yourself before you go too far, you're already insulting members here..

      I know you're upset and feeling bad, but please take a break

    • WalrusDragonOnABike [they/them]@lemmy.today
      ·
      5 months ago

      Perhaps by you if you haven't noticed it. It certainly does happen.

      I've seen it a ton given my mom has been gendered primarily as a man (including by gay men who hang out at gay bars, where surely they've seen lots of butch lesbians - its not just the hets who can't tell) since at least a teen. She's not intersex in anyway as far as I know. She gets misgendered in-person and over the phone all the time. I've never once seen her correct someone - so most people probably never realize their mistake. She's not the only one I've seen it happen to either. For example, I had a classmate who, when I first met them asked me to guess if they were a girl or a guy because of how frequently she was misgendered. I was confused because she looked obviously like a girl to me at the time, but I guess a lot of people have weird heuristics that just didn't work for her.