Inspired by this dorky exchange I had, thank u BountifulEggnog.

I want to know what your gender means to you, how you define it, what it means for you to "be" that gender and how you define it. Don't fuss about 'correct definitions' or anything, this is about your experience, I want to know what it means to you. How you relate to that gender, perceive it.

Genders have a social construction aspect and is very subjective, so I think people's subjective, personal views of their own are both important and interesting. Inquiring mind wants to know! interviewer

I'll share some of mine I guess.

I was a trans woman until the contradictions sharpened to a razor's edge after reading Gender Outlaw and The Gender Accelerationist Manifesto. My brain got cracked in half. I have always hated the effects testosterone would have on my body, so estrogen was a given, but while I do identify with certain things that are commonly associated with being a woman... if nothing is inherently gendered, what even is a gender? niko-concern I had a whole little episode about it in the megathread once.

As I went on from there, I realised that while I like certain things about "being a woman", equally I found I'd been sort of stifled by trying to fit into the social role. The women I have always related to most are the cis autistic women who basically yeet presentation in favour of dressing for sensory comfort. Almost kinda non binary, in a way... The more I interrogated binary gender in relation to myself, the more I dug up stuff like this. Also I didn't really like that "woman" is associated with cis people a lot, I really like the trans part of my identity, feel a lot of love for it. I've felt freer and mentally clearer and truer to myself as a Non Binary Transfem, it's cool and funny. What does it mean to me? It represents my goofy sometimes-androgynous presentation, my lack of cissie gender, how being neurodiverse influences my view, being a funny noody goblin. Share yours =)

  • khizuo [ze/zir]
    ·
    2 months ago

    Np, I had a lot of fun :)

    spoiler

    My relationship with the word transmasc is honestly a pretty complicated one, and I don't think it's completely settled yet. I think it's very possible that I may start identifying with the label in the future. Weirdly enough I do not mind if other people view me as transmasc, I just usually don't describe myself that way. I feel like one of the big sticking points for me here is that I do not want to be "masculine" (whatever that means) and I have zero desire to be "one of the boys" like many trans men/transmascs describe. I don't think either of those things are requirements for being transmasc, though... I think I just need to do more gender noodling to work out my feelings around this.

    I think learning a little bit about the history of how gender and sexuality literally changed because of changing material conditions completely just broke any sense I had of "man" and "woman" being immutable categories, lol. The fact that within like a hundred years women wearing pants went from "transgressive gender performance" to "just a Tuesday" renders all cissexist conceptions of gender void so quickly, and that's just one example out of thousands. Skirts are definitely coming back for men within the next century, I'm pretty sure I'll be alive to see it. I'm already seeing the beginnings of it in the hanfu revival movement in China, for example.

    • ashinadash [she/her]
      ·
      2 months ago

      cat-trans

      spoiler

      Huh... yeah, it is funny lots of transmasc people are not "masculine" in presentation, but if you don't vibe with it due to the masc part, understandable. More gender noodling is always fun and cool though ✨

      Yeah me too!!! None of it actually means anything, it's a bit!!!! "Man" is just a guy someone made up!!! Lol my brain broke in exactly the same way yours has, awesome. Skirts for men will be funny, in the past when dudes wear skirts do they tuck...?