Jfc, that's so distressing. I've been in a similar situation and, can confirm, it drove me absolutely nuts. The inflexibility of the bureaucracy and the level of extremely personal gut spilling you have to do for anyone to even begin to acknowledge that anything is wrong with the way the system is set up is akin to an eldrich horror in and of itself. The "funniest" part was that I was dealing with an ostensibly leftist entity and the person in charge of making the systems of the org inclusive kept telling me "we don't want you to misunderstand and think that the leaders of this org are transphobic or xenophobic", but in the same breath told me how accommodating my existence is unrealistic and would take years of work, like BRUUH. The level of gaslighting was wild and absolutely unbearable. I literally had to explain to them over and over again how systemic oppression works, with 0 success. I curse their name to this very day and will continue far into the future.