• SorosFootSoldier [he/him, they/them]
    ·
    14 hours ago

    I don't talk about it much but I was a late bloomer and didn't sleep with someone until I was 25 and I haven't been (outside of a few dates) with anyone since and I'm well over 30. This was a good read. I often beat myself up that technically I'm an incel, even though I'm not interested in seeing anyone or wanting sex.

    • ThermonuclearEgg [she/her, they/them]
      ·
      edit-2
      11 hours ago

      even though I'm not interested in seeing anyone or wanting sex.

      Wouldn't that be volcel, and thus not incel, if you aren't interested?

      It's perfectly fine to not want it, the asexual community calls out this societal standard as "compulsory sexuality"

      • SorosFootSoldier [he/him, they/them]
        ·
        11 hours ago

        It's perfectly fine to not want it, the asexual community calls out this societal standard as "compulsory sexuality"

        Interesting. I wonder where getting off though fits in with the whole volcel asexual community as I still do that.

        • TheDoctor [they/them]
          ·
          11 hours ago

          Asexuality is about attraction, not about libido. Some ace people get themselves off regularly. Some don’t. There’s a lot of reasons to engage in sexual activity other than sexual attraction.

        • Kuori [she/her]
          ·
          edit-2
          11 hours ago

          to my understanding masturbation is still relatively common amongst asexual people

          e: the consequences of never refreshing before posting

        • glans [it/its]
          ·
          11 hours ago

          as i understand asexuality they don't find any inherent contradiction there.