At least online, anonymity plays a part, but the discussions seem to have a lot of masculine energy to them. Is it maybe also like music, chess, or comedy where socialization plays a role in the male dominance?

I remember 60% of Bernie's constituency was female, but it doesn't seem to translate online. How can we work to attract more women to the movement?

  • Pezevenk [he/him]
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    4 years ago

    Maybe op is being downvoted because it's not the left in general, it's pretty much this sub.

      • Pezevenk [he/him]
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        4 years ago

        Even in the body it says "the movement" which seems to imply this place is "the movement"? Idk it's kind of a weird post. There are very few women HERE, it's a problem of this sub, not the movement or the left in general.

          • Pezevenk [he/him]
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            4 years ago

            It's not really a semantics issue. And I really think people gotta stop making a big fuss about their interpretations of downvotes.

              • Pezevenk [he/him]
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                4 years ago

                Users being upset about a general culture that doesn’t care about them is about their experience. It’s not about “dogpileing on them”

                You don't think it happens online at all? Because I've seen it happen so much and it's just bad. It feels like everyone is out to get everyone else at its worst and it's gotten worse with covid. I think I'm gonna leave this place and social media as a whole for a while because the lockdown thing has made me spend a lot of time that I shouldn't be spending online because most people are either miserable or trying to make others miserable and it's making me feel like shit too by osmosis. I don't want to be the reason someone deletes their account. If saying something like what I said affects someone so much even after attempting to explain myself then I really don't wanna stick around and be the reason this happens again.

                It's not just this issue either. A while ago some user was upset because I posted a joke attacking the target of their post and they misinterpreted it as an attack on their post itself, and because apparently I had said something negative against one of the other (completely irrelevant) post they recently made, they thought I had a personal grudge against them and I was going around attacking them. It's like it's 100 times harder to communicate anything properly, and everyone is already either pissed, tense or depressed so any misstep from anyone leads to shit flinging in the best case, or really depressing shit that hurts people in the worst case and I don't want more of that. May this pandemic end so that we can return to talking to people and organising irl, achieving fucking anything at all, and reaching some kind of understanding. I miss it and it's been months since I had meaningful human contact and this is not a substitute, this is worse than being alone.

                So yeah bye I guess.

                  • Pezevenk [he/him]
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                    4 years ago

                    , I absolutely guarantee that your attitudes towards LGBT people alienate them irl and not just here.

                    I am LGBT. So are like most of the people close to me irl. Might as well just off myself since I'm clearly alienating everyone I care about.

                      • Pezevenk [he/him]
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                        4 years ago

                        Ah ok, I said I don't think being trans or being gay or being straight or being cis or whatever the fuck is necessarily biological and inherent at birth, so that means I don't care about trans people because you decided I was saying being trans is western decadence. I don't think there is anything I can say to convince you honestly.

                          • Pezevenk [he/him]
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                            4 years ago

                            Okay so if it’s not inherent at birth it’s something that people either choose or are taught right?

                            Something that is determined at a very early age maybe helped by some kind of hereditary disposition helping in most cases. Yes. Why is that bad again? It's literally been part of my experience as I explained before, as well as the experience of some people I have talked with, is my experience "disgustingly harmful"? Is it "straight out of a reactionary playbook"? Am I supposed to tell reactionaries that no, you see, it wasn't my FAULT, because I was born like that? How is that better from telling them "fuck you it is what it is and it's not my issue if you don't like it"?

                            If people are taught to be trans and some cultures have more trans people those culture taught more people to be trans. So then Western culture teaches people to be trans and if not for Western culture there wouldn’t be trans people.

                            What? Trans people don't exist just in "western culture", and there are cultures where it is much more commonplace than "western culture". Do you think there is western culture and a homogeneous block of non-western culture?

                            Like cool, you may not agree and you may think it's true, and that the effect is purely biological. But why are you trying to paint me as some kind of reactionary for arguing it? Do you know how easy it would be to paint you as a reactionary for arguing nature above nurture? I'm not doing it because I think it is unfair, why are you doing it to me?

            • the_river_cass [she/her]
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              4 years ago

              hey, people get really worked up about this stuff because it's triggering and because it's something we have to fight constantly. please, please, please don't tell people what to make a fuss about... the comment has a long, misogynist history in the anglo world.

              • Pezevenk [he/him]
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                4 years ago

                Like, I literally made a big struggle session post about that same issue more than a month ago, before this shit started, just leaving it here before someone starts accusing me of not wanting this conversation to happen or whatever: https://hexbear.net/post/55018

                  • Pezevenk [he/him]
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                    4 years ago

                    I am not telling you the issue isn't real or whatever, jesus, this is EXACTLY the stuff I am talking about, just interpreting everyone's posts the worst way possible. I am saying that just because someone downvoted this post it isn't because they don't want this conversation to happen or because they're sexist or whatever the fuck, because people are now getting banned over downvoting stuff so this has to be said apparently. I don't disagree with the damn post. IN THIS VERY THREAD I supported its main point. Like, this sub having an issue is literally part of my first reply to you.

                      • Pezevenk [he/him]
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                        4 years ago

                        Alright, serious question, what did I say that might hurt someone?

                          • Pezevenk [he/him]
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                            4 years ago

                            OK. I am sorry if this made you feel that way but it genuinely isn't what I wanted these posts to be read as. I didn't want to dismiss the concerns, as I said the reason I posted this was about the downvotes in particular because there are tons of reasons why someone might want to downvote something. It wouldn't be a big deal and I wouldn't feel like I should say that if banning people according to what they downvote wasn't a policy.

                            Also maybe my responses came off more aggressive than I wanted because (not just due to this sub but other places too) lots of people are extremely suspicious towards other people all the time, and they just take the most uncharitable interpretation of what they're saying just to dogpile on them, and it makes everything very miserable and exhausting. That's what I thought you were trying to do when you said I was complaining about people making a fuss about this issue in general rather than just the specific part about the downvotes. And yeah I don't think all of the downvotes the post received were of the kind I said.

              • Pezevenk [he/him]
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                4 years ago

                Ummm no? I think people have to stop the dumb downvote thing, I didn't object to this kind of conversation. Another thing people have to stop is twisting what others are saying.