Permanently Deleted
Why is there a struggle session over this? Let's just keep it simple: flirting is really no different from another human interaction; I that there are situations and environments where certain types of behavior is and isn't allowed. being flirtatious in a bar or an appropriate chat room is an expectable environment, any other enviroment may depend on the relationship between you and the person you want to get together with, and there are environments where it's not acceptable and or taboo.
TL;DR, read the room, make good judgements.
-7DeadlyFetishes
No, we absolutely have to argue here until we manage to rationally codify and delineate the exact places and circumstances where you can or can't flirt and write a big sex constitution about it and then memorize it so that we know how to act in every situation.
TL;DR, read the room, make good judgements.
Oh yeah that'll go just fine.
Only thing I'd add is people who consistently hornypost are annoying. There's people on this site who seem like they need a healthier outlet for their libido.
I can’t read, thought you were the user I tagged in the first comment lol
For what it’s worth you were not the person I had in mind when I brought up annoying people
I don’t recall ever being uncomfortable or annoyed from something you said. And I do recognize your username so I think I’d remember if I had been.
I’m not gonna put the user on complete blast but they’ve had posts removed multiple times for being too horny or making light of sexual violence.
:cat-vibing:
healthier outlets are good regardless, but like... id also rather see a dozen self-affirming hornyposts from every user every day, rather than a half dozen objectifying ones over the course of the week
so, as long as its not actively harmful, i dont care if its annoyingly frequent, cause sometimes a message board on the internet is a healthier outlet.
especially for folks tryina figure out wtf their sexual morphology (meaning, the constituent parts of their sexual identity and interests and so on) even looks like, while living in the fascist hellscape of late stage capitalisms intrinsic bigotry, a space free from judgement is a good thing.
and if it is actively harmful, than it doesnt belong regardless of frequency!
thank you for coming to my
ted talkchapo dot chat
Agreed. I know we have some younger posters around too which makes it an even worse idea.
There's enough sexual pathology here without actively setting up a permanent kink discussion comm.
Within a month we're going to have multiple struggle sessions about whether 'X' poster is a chasing sex pest, or whether enjoying 'Y' is Chuddish, with breakdown threads galore and horny counter-memes that get people banned and... Yeah no. Uphold the Volcel oath. Keep that shit in DMs or on main.
I don't want to sound like I'm proposing banning horny-posting, or just expressing sexuality here. By all means do your thing, honestly trying to ban it is going to lead to a very similar outcome, because then we have to define "problematic" hornt and again.. yeah no.
I've just seen proposals for c/horny before and have put my dollar in everytime. It woud to be a shit show. Keeping being randy on main is a safety valve.
This site has minors and comrades on the ace spectrum. Unless there is age verification (which still doesn't really prevent abuse, just liability) and dedicated comms or tags, this site should keep it chill on the horny. Discussions of sex and sexuality will naturally occur, but they shouldn't get explicit imo
There are so many freaks and chasers on the left that if this site opens the floodgates on hornyposting then I'm gonna have to check out. I see enough of it at work.
I think the question is should how/if should we restrict hornyposting.
I certainly hope we're not considering allowing more potentially toxic shit. I think this place is already cis male enough that if we allow even more horny, it'll drive out our existing women, and limit our ability to gain new women.
We really should consider why we're mostly comprised of cis men, especially compared to the left as a whole, and adjust our behavior accordingly. I suspect a lot of it is legacy from the sub and podcast both having male audiences, but also a lot of it is probably our behavior too.
I'll show my :LIB: side, but even as a joke, not really okay: https://youtu.be/PpChxAfTftU?t=80
I fucking hate the sexualization that occurs in leftist spaces. Personally, I was abused and before that I used to always be a horny fuck in public. I don't get horniness anymore, but I would seriously recommend not talking about it in leftist spaces. Where there isn't a lot of restriction against it, we see a lot of sex pests, and I know this from personal experience. (anarchist 'commune' which in actuality was just a pedo pit. Shit was horrible for me and I bet many others.)
Just talk horny in private or dedicated spaces, I'd say.
I don't have sexual attraction at all, but when I was younger and before my abuse, I would probably agree that there needs to be more presence of it or something. But personally I would keep sexual and socialist life divided, many leftist spaces become destroyed due to rampant power balances that lead to sex abuse and manipulation. Its happened and I've witnessed it happen. When I used to run a leftist space, the mods were sex pests and it led to rapid destruction and isolation in the community, making many feel uncomfortable. I feel more safe in places with no sex discussion whatsoever, but all left spaces are different. If this becomes a place where sex pests are welcome and encouraged, then i'll migrate to lemmygrad. I dont care one way or another.
its been a rather vague term, but my definition is an individual who preys upon mentally weak people with sexual behavior. Usually digitally too, but I guess it could happen in person. I dont know if my abuser was a sex pest or not, but he was definitely filth who might fill some of the category.
How is anybody on this site "flirting?" I don't know any of you, you're just faceless names to me, so how are we supposed to flirt?
I'm not even sure what "horny posting" is, so what does banning it constitute? Never make a joke that involves sex? When I posted this a few days ago some people said it was a "horny post," but I just thought of it as a funny meme that was risque. Did people actually think I was posting something for others to jerk it to? Would this kind of post be banned? Can we never post risque memes?
First post bad. Follow up post good. Girls can kiss without Ben garrison style horny drawing.
How is it "Ben Garrison style?"
I posted the version with the guys because people wanted it, but the joke would make no sense if it was just that followup by itself.
Tbh sometimes I get a little tired when every time I go to chapo, at least one of the active threads shown to me will be about being horny 4 womenz. I know a lot of it is """ironic""" but idk, sometimes I'm over it. I guess it feels like a lot of chapo is cishet dudes? Like, """ironic""" posts about AOC's feet or wtf ever are more frequent than Galavant gifs y'know lol. I think I'd support hornyposting more if we had a community that was more equally spread in terms of who we're being horny for, if that makes sense. (People flirting or talking about their personal sexual experiences or relationships is sth different for me and totally fine.)
Galavant gifs
I WISH that was more frequent.
Oh shit does this count as a horny post?
One of the things I appreciate most about Galavant is how equally opportunity horny it is lol. Something for everyone!
Yeah I also get kinda tired of the excessive horniness here, sometimes it's over the top and cringey.
Are we discussing people actually trying to solicit sex/sexual content on here? I think that's a bad road to go down, for... obvious reasons.
But as for people just being "horny"? IDK, from some comments in this thread I definitely get the sense a lot of people are uncomfortable with it. Some seem to enjoy it.
On one hand I get there are a lot of lonely and frustrated people on here who may enjoy the vent.
On the other hand I get there are minors who use this site and there are ethical and liability issues.
On the other hand I get we should celebrate sexual liberation, and a lot of the horniness on this site does come from queer people who like expressing themselves publicly.
On the other hand I get there are ace folk on here who maybe don't want such a highly sexualized space, and also a lot of the horniness comes from straight dudes.
On the other hand I get this site was largely inspired by a community that was about left-wing people who had goofy, over the top, senses of humor and liked poop and sex jokes, and that can be fun.
On the other hand I get other people want this to be a more inviting place and a lot of people find that behavior cringe at the best of times.
IDK, maybe human interaction is just inherently flawed and some people are always doomed to be put off by any community. I guess the debate is who this community should appeal to the most.
Maybe I should just go outside?
My thoughts exactly.
I am pretty cool with a lot of content, but I'm not cool with alienating our comrades. This thread has given me some insight on things I have never considered.
Idk if I've ever done anything that could be considered hornyposting here, but after this thread, there are some things I would've been okay with posting, but now wouldn't.
Yeah I kinda feel the same way too.
I guess one thing I feel weird about. On the old sub I actually made a connection with someone. We kinda jokingly horny posted and then chatted and then formed a long distance thing. We were both adults living in places where we were kind of isolated as leftists. And it was nice. We did some sexting and chatting and it was a good thing cuz I think we were both depressed and horny at the time. We eventually drifted apart because we both meet people irl. I’m glad it happened but I also sort of get how a really toxic version of it could arise in the same circumstances. So maybe in the macro sense it wasn’t the healthiest thing.
That's cool! You shouldn't feel bad about it. But we should evaluate what kind of horny is potentially harmful to some of our users and future users
I think before we can truly have productive discussion on hornyposting, we should define it.
We should define which of the following is acceptable behavior?
- Thirsting over Che Guevara pics
- Thirsting over AOC pics
- Sexualizing Bernie Sanders
- Shouting "I AM HORNY" into the void
- Flirting with users
- Talking about your own kinks/fetishes
- Large breasted cartoon posts
- Photoshopping representatives of communism to have a massive dong
- Stating that X makes you erect/wet
- "[conservative] is just horny for [leftist]"
- meme formats that include overly sexualized representations of people
Because I suspect we all have different subsets of these we'd consider acceptable.
I am personally, the horniest person alive, and a cis bi man. But I really find little reason to post that kind of stuff. I've found some things funny other people find uncomfortable, but I also find some posts to step wayyy over the line with what's offensive.
I think we should prioritize the needs of our users who are women, victims of sexual violence, lgbtq, or ace.
On flirting with other users, we probably shouldn't have people indulging in that if only because there are underage users here and we shouldn't have room for potentially creepy/ abusive situations to spring up in this space.
100% agreed.
Tho I've never seen it here. Seems kinda hard/pointless to flirt on a site where it's pretty much anonymous with no pics.
No. Some I feel should be allowed. Some I feel shouldn't. Just a list of types of content I feel we should evaluate.
My opinion, as an ace. Ironic le fonny sex humor and whatever is funny but unironic horny shit is cringe. Sex and kink forums are numerous and always open for business. Now, that's not to say discussion of sex/sexual topics is cringe. I think there's absolutely a place here for discussion of sexuality, but there's a difference between that and the 'IM HORNY AND IM GONNA TELL EVERYONE ABOUT IT' kind of stuff.
I am super horny IRL and find online horniness outside of dedicated spaces to be incredibly cringe. Like galaxy brain cringe. The post subreddit ban discord had some weird shit in it sometimes. :cringe:
Edit: also the trans cuties thread from yore and the objectification vibes. Yikes. Remember that shit?
The post subreddit ban discord
Oh fuck don't remind me, that is better left off in the past lol. And yeah the chapo sub got very weird, I remember a women posting a photo of some left related tattoo she got and the comments were basically full of pure cringe and really stereotypical r*dditor type creepy.
Yeah, good point. I'll elaborate: I think that kind of stuff is disrespectful of boundaries and, in my mind, is akin to the kind of sex pest stuff you see IRL. I've been in a number of spaces (workplaces specifically) where there's always two or three people that are constantly openly horny and clearly get off on making other people know about it. It's something that I have grown to have a very negative view of.
It's me the ambassador of horny, I have no advice though, for I am bad at my job
Idk I've personally never been wigged by sexual stuff here other than a few instances where the person got rightfully told to tone it the fuck down, but I also get why others would want a dedicated horny comm it could be contained to, and I would support a no pics c/horny if people wanted that
