This was in my high school and early college years, later on in life I was able develop romantic relationships with them and healthy platonic relationships. I’ll be upfront and say a lot of the times if a straight dude hates women vehemently, it’s probably because he’s not getting laid or able to form any semblance of a romance with a woman.

  • Phish [he/him, any]
    ·
    4 years ago

    I appreciate you sharing this. I think a lot of men who hate women are just incredibly unhappy. That absolutely doesn't excuse it, but it does sort of explain it. Empathy and understanding could go a long way, even with people who don't necessarily deserve it.

      • Phish [he/him, any]
        ·
        4 years ago

        I completely agree with you. I guess I'm trying my best not to view empathy through a competitive lens. It's a lot easier for me to empathize with women being hated for no reason than with the guys doing the hating. I didn't really do a good job articulating it but part of my point is that those feelings of hatred could possibly be avoided all together if we approached loneliness with more compassion from the start.

    • Leonadas445 [he/him]
      ·
      4 years ago

      Thanks man. It’s hard to share this shit. It’s not exactly a nice portrait of myself.

      • Phish [he/him, any]
        ·
        4 years ago

        Yeah self crit is really hard for me to share as well. I think it says a lot about you that you've been able to shift your perspective over time.

        • Leonadas445 [he/him]
          ·
          4 years ago

          Therapy and getting on for undiagnosed bipolar 2 helped immensely. It helped me figure myself and as soon as I wasn’t an angry resentful Man, lo and behold more people wanted to be be around me and loneliness slowly started becoming less of an issue.

          I’m still struggling with an opiate addiction, but I treat people much better and choose to examine myself before reacting against other people.

          Loneliness and atomization is a very dark place to be though, I don’t know if I could handle going back.

      • Phish [he/him, any]
        ·
        4 years ago

        I agree with you. I'm certainly not saying these views should go unchallenged. In fact, I believe the opposite. I just think empathy is a crucial part of addressing the issue and finding a way to reach these people to explain to them why they're wrong. There's no scenario where that empathy should supersede the way women are viewed or treated by men who hate them. I just see posts like OP's and think not every one of them is a lost cause.