So Dan from Game Grumps (aged 42) is getting cancelled for supposed grooming. I don't want to say he's not a groomer, because theres stuff about other alleged behavior that isnt detailed at all in it.

But like the story presented is that a 17 year old fan started messaging him. He thanks her for her support and wishes her a happy birthday when she turns 18 about a month later. Then nothing is shown until the fans 22 and they exchange some cringey sexts. Then apparently they fuck and he breaks things off. And everyone's calling this grooming, but like, that's not what grooming is? I donno, it just feels like people really have been stretching definitions of things for the last year like with that Alex Morse thing to take advantage of cancel culture. And it seems like it only causes people to ignore victims who are actually groomed.

    • GVAGUY3 [he/him]
      ·
      4 years ago

      I saw some people saying Jon is best grump and I'm all like bruh, he is a Nazi.

      • spinachupper [he/him]
        ·
        4 years ago

        The parasocial effect is way too strong with him. His fans deny him being a Nazi even when he literally says he doesn't want immigrants cause they taint the gene pool.

        • invalidusernamelol [he/him]
          ·
          4 years ago

          His videos were legitimately funny until he started hinting at being a massive fucking racist (which, to be fair, was pretty early on)

          • spinachupper [he/him]
            ·
            4 years ago

            I don't remember his videos doing that, the Nazi reveal was totally out of the blue.

            • invalidusernamelol [he/him]
              ·
              4 years ago

              I think he has a few jokes that were in hindsight pretty clearly racist, I don't feel like wading through his videos looking for evidence though

  • Bedulge [he/him]
    ·
    edit-2
    4 years ago

    Alright, lukewarm take on this stuff... having sex with someone that's like half your age is a bit creepy, no doubt, but like....

    a 22-year-old is a fucking full-grown adult. It is a grown-ass person who is out in the world, working, paying bills, paying taxes, drinking beer, voting, and doing all the other things that adults do. An adult has the right to have sex with whomever they desire, as long as they are both of age and are consenting, and there's not any kind of coercion going on. What is the issue here?

    Over the past couple years I've seen this 'grooming' and 'age gap' discourse growing and growing on Twitter and like... I just don't get it. I'm mid-twenties myself and the idea that I shouldn't have the right to fuck a 45-year-old if I want to is like... kind of infantilizing, is it not?

    IDK, im just not getting it. Why, out of all the stuff that is happening in the world, should I choose to concern myself with a consensual sexual relationship between two adults,, just because the age gap is usually large?

    • invalidusernamelol [he/him]
      ·
      4 years ago

      Famous people should only fuck other famous people, it's just cleaner that way. There's an implicit power dynamic when you're famous and the person you're fu king isn't. Not saying that the power dynamic makes these accusations more credible, but that it really does create a one sided thing. I'm sure him blowing her off felt a lot worse than a regular blow off because he was famous.

      Basically, ban groupies, stop fucking fans idiots.

        • invalidusernamelol [he/him]
          ·
          edit-2
          4 years ago

          In this case, the power comes from her being a fan since she was a child. He's been a very popular YouTuber for like a decade plus now, so 20 year olds were watching him when they were in middle/elementary school. He knew she was one of those fans and should have avoided that situation.

          Basically, anyone who likes you for reasons related to your fame is a dangerous situation. Doubly so if you were a formative influence on them (even if it was just poop jokes all the way down).

          And using your 100k twitter followers to get sex is weird, don't do it.

            • invalidusernamelol [he/him]
              ·
              4 years ago

              I'm not in any way saying that it's morally wrong to have sex with someone who likes you for your fame, just that it almost always ends like this because the other person is experiencing different emotions about the relationship than you. Even if it was totally consensual and nothing bad happened, they're still going to have to deal with the added emotion of essentially being rejected by someone they idolized and you end up with shit like this.

              I'm staying this more as a guideline than a hard rule. Kinda a "don't shit where you eat" type thing.

                • invalidusernamelol [he/him]
                  ·
                  edit-2
                  4 years ago

                  Yeah, it's just a bad decision. Like fucking your bosses ex wife or something. Not morally wrong, but be prepared for the consequences.

  • REallyN [she/her,they/them]
    ·
    4 years ago

    He gives me more “wannabe rock star fucking groupies” vibes then “groomer pedo” vibes tbh.

    People should honestly know better either way, and by people I mean youtubers

    • hexaflexagonbear [he/him]
      ·
      4 years ago

      He gives me more “wannabe rock star fucking groupies” vibes then “groomer pedo” vibes tbh.

      Pretty sure rockstars fucked underage girls pretty regularly, so he's actually less creepy than a wannabe rock star from what we know.

      • REallyN [she/her,they/them]
        ·
        4 years ago

        It can be, there’s definitely a power imbalance. But I would be hesitant to say every instance of someone hooking up with a celeb like that is exploitative in nature.

        • PM_ME_YOUR_FOUCAULTS [he/him, they/them]
          ·
          4 years ago

          It's messy because I don't want to deny any agency to people who might just want to fuck someone they're attracted to and admire, but it can definitely be exploitative

          • REallyN [she/her,they/them]
            ·
            4 years ago

            Yeah, like I’m sure there are people who have and are fine and don’t regret it, so I can kind of understand Dan’s stupidity here, but he really should of known better even if it’s not “grooming”

        • deadtoddler420 [any]
          hexagon
          ·
          4 years ago

          Like it totally can be but at no point in the evidence shown was there any promise of using that power to help her out, and like he didn't surprise whip his dick out. He sent her that hilarious hot tub video first.

      • StLangoustine [any]
        ·
        4 years ago

        Hell, having sex with anyone without paying them is a form of wage theft.

        • Offline [none/use name]
          ·
          4 years ago

          ...Most sex work is a form of exploitation on both sides no i will not cede my time onlyfans is not praxis.

            • Offline [none/use name]
              ·
              4 years ago

              i blew 2000 on camgirls when i was depressed last year, it doesn't mix well with drinking and adds up.

        • Nagarjuna [he/him]
          ·
          4 years ago

          Now that everything is commodified, any action you take that is not compensated is wage theft. That's why I stream my facecare routine on twitch, have a patreon for my cha cha posts and an only fans for my morning wank.

        • invalidusernamelol [he/him]
          ·
          edit-2
          4 years ago

          No, you see, my sex time is worth $x, and their sex time is worth $x, so in a two way consensual relationship, the wage cancels out. I could pay them $20 and they pay me $20, but we'd just be exchanging $20 bills.

          • StLangoustine [any]
            ·
            edit-2
            4 years ago

            No, that's authoritarian (or liberal?). You have to let the free market (or central economic commission?) decide how much each of yours sex times is worth and have the cheaper party pay the difference. If you don't do that someone is exploiting someone.

      • Kaputnik [he/him]
        ·
        4 years ago

        Wasn't that part of what caused all the issues with Pinegrove?

  • longhorn617 [any]
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    edit-2
    4 years ago

    There is/was definitely a trend in certain circles of "I had consensual sex with a person that I later regretted/was embarrassed about, and because that person is older than me it's now grooming". Definitely saw an uptick of that in 2020. Grooming is still a thing, though, I'm not discounting that at all.

      • longhorn617 [any]
        ·
        edit-2
        4 years ago

        I don't know what famous ones to point to other than Alex Morse, but there was a month to two where grooming discourse was hot on Twitter, and I saw other accounts on Twitter claiming they were groomed at like 27 by a 40 something year old who they (self admittedly) had consensual sex with, and the texts they show are just crigney but not grooming/didn't really have any of the actual signs of grooming (gift giving and eventually expecting stuff in return, isolating them from their social network, etc.) It's was a phenomenon in a certain corner of twitter more so than a widespread cultural phenomenon. There are absolutely adults that do get groomed by adult sexual predators, I'm not saying it's something that happens only to children or anything like that.

    • Kaputnik [he/him]
      ·
      4 years ago

      If you're thinking of Ryan from Roosterteeth then that was actually children not people over the age of consent. And at the same time Adam from funhaus got fired cause he did weird sex stuff at work and sent people videos of his wife iirc

      • GVAGUY3 [he/him]
        ·
        edit-2
        4 years ago

        I'm prepared for another Ryan situation, but as OP pointed out, the evidence seems way more flimsy than what initially came out about Ryan Haywood which was way more believable, and that was before the first accusation came out. There could be more coming out in a few days.

    • GVAGUY3 [he/him]
      ·
      4 years ago

      The Rooster Teeth situation is way worse than what Dan has on him right now.

  • chantox
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    edit-2
    1 year ago

    deleted by creator

    • doublepepperoni [none/use name]
      ·
      edit-2
      4 years ago

      Fandoms of online personalities are obsessive and awful in general, I believe some weirdos on 4chan believed they'd found out that Mike and Jessi from RedLetterMedia had a kid from snooping Milwaukee area hospital records

          • invalidusernamelol [he/him]
            ·
            4 years ago

            If Jonteon was given power over ICE, you bet your ass we'd be talking about that shitsack daily here.

      • GalaxyBrain [they/them]
        ·
        4 years ago

        Fuck, I really did not want to know that and I miss Jessi being on the show, especially cause she had to leave over that

          • GalaxyBrain [they/them]
            ·
            4 years ago

            I found out Garret Gilchrist, the guy from Gorilla Interrupted that was never seen again and it seems annoyed the rest on a Simpsons shitpost group I'm in. He commented something about the Planet of the Apes Musical, I replied with something like "Well you DO know about apes." I later realised that probably may not have be well recieved since he's gotten harassed before. I just wanted to make a joke

              • GalaxyBrain [they/them]
                ·
                4 years ago

                I personally meant it like "hey you're that guy from that movie" and then realised people probably tried to track him down and then looked into it and yeeeah they did, I was using normal brain instead of internet brain.

      • invalidusernamelol [he/him]
        ·
        4 years ago

        Yeah, RLM is one of the few YouTube groups that doesn't fuck around with fans. They hate their fans more than Chapo does lol

    • spinachupper [he/him]
      ·
      4 years ago

      I love how when Jontron left they just made shit up about how he slapped Suzy. But then he had to one-up that by being a Nazi dipshit.

  • GnastyGnuts [he/him]
    ·
    4 years ago

    That's what many people would consider a weird or off-putting age gap, but I dunno, calling it "grooming" specifically when the younger person is still a whole 22 years old is iffy to me. I dunno, I assume by default that e-celeb people are skeevy. I've heard people suggest that it's always unethical for someone to have sex with their fans, but honestly I don't know if I entirely agree with that, since sometimes people just want to have sex with celebrities they like.

  • budoguytenkaichi [he/him,they/them]
    ·
    edit-2
    4 years ago

    As far as I can tell, he fucked everyone when they were of age, and the evidence of "grooming" is flimsy at best, so idgaf.

    As long as everyone's legal and consenting, I personally don't really care if a 100 year-old fucks a 19 year-old or whatever.

    Is it for me? Probably not. But I'm not gonna cancel someone over it.

  • Grownbravy [they/them]
    ·
    4 years ago

    From what I could gather, it seems this happened early in his GG career, he was 34, she was 22, but he knew her since he was 17? But didnt make contact outside of a happy birthday text at 18? Then hooked up at a later time after exchanging weird sexts?

    That last detail sound very in character. He has said on the show he’s done that a few times early in his career and feels bad or scummy for it.

  • Hexagon [she/her]
    ·
    4 years ago

    Half of internet drama in general seems based around people just not understanding words. Creepy? Sure, I agree, even with a 34/22 age gap. Unethical? Yeah, I would say dating fans is generally a bit on the unethical side most of the time. Grooming? lol no, not even close.