The photo is a 1974 photo of Leslie Feinberg, from the FBI file on hir. I've written a piece on my interpretation of Transgender Warriors and Trans Liberation, but I don't think it's quite polished enough, so I'll post it later. Instead, I'll go over hir FBI file: https://s3.amazonaws.com/NARAprodstorage/lz/dc-metro/rg-065/6282555/Batch0010/6282555_100-HQ-480756.PDF.
The FBI thought Feinberg could be violating the Communist Control Act, advocating the overthrow of the government, and engaging in rebellion. Needless to say, a hero to all of us. Feinberg was a member of the Workers World Party (the party still exists, but more notably PSL split from it), which apparently wasn't openly advocating for the overthrow of the U.S, they just think it's inevitable.
My favorite line? "captioned subject is believed to be a white female, who became male through some kind of sex change operation, and is possibly homosexual". Some interesting language choice, and it's an interesting snapshot into the evolution of Leslie's identity.
The FBI found Leslie's place of birth and birthdate from public school records. It's a bit of an interesting look into all of the many places the FBI can get their information, along with how information like that was so much more patchwork before the digital age.
"Interview of subject is not being recommended because of the questionable nature of his sexuality". Hmm, interesting.
It's interesting how their investigation spanned multiple cities, from Kansas City to NYC to Bufffalo to Boston. It probably involved quite a few officers, though I'm sure it wasn't the main focus for all of them.
There's some interesting mention about changes in Leslie's gender identity. Born a girl, for a time wearing a beard and mustache, then going back to "she". I'm sure we all know, Feinberg's gender didn't stop evolving there.
"Subject reportedly contributes all extra money to WWP", Leslie definitely was dedicated to the cause. Leslie doesn't attend NYC WWP meetings, but the FBI doesn't mention why.
The FBI isn't immune to typoes, Leslie did some "criminal terspass" that garnered some attention.They wasted some time checking if Leslie was in Boston, but verified where Leslie in NYC lived by pretending to be a part of the Voter Registration Commission.
There's a whole 43 pages of documents, all just from 1974-75. There's plenty of interesting tidbits in there, so maybe check it out.
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sad, talking about self harm
Woke up still feeling like shit, hasn't gotten better. Terrible sleep last night, extremely dysphoric. It's mostly sh fantasies right now, my leg is burning. Have shit to do all day too. Have knives the whole day. Idk. Probably fucked.
bottom dysphoria
Part of why I slept and felt so terrible is I kept waking up with fucking erections.
Sh urges are real bad.
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I had a very bizarre dream about my ex living with me still, my family gathered around for Thanksgiving. We were still broken up but it was a little awkward, like we were spouses who are officially separated or even divorced but there wasn't really anywhere else to go. They asked me to drive them for about 4 hours to a city. I knew it would make me late for Thanksgiving supper and that my car might not actually be able to make that drive, but I agreed anyway - I had had therepy the day before and part of it was still dealing with the guilt that remained after the breakup like over a year after. Anyway, I woke up before that - my ex was berating me, in the dream, for "taking too long to change clothes" lol. I didn't sleep well either and now I can't get back to sleep.
When my sister came to stay with my other sister after being apprehended from our dad (he is not a good person) she did self harm by cutting and was at risk of continuing. So the advice from the children services government org was to remove all knives from the house. All of them. It's up to you if you want to disclose these feelings to your parents/whoever you're living with and see if they'll agree to remove or lock away every knife including any personal ones you have. Removing even the temptation and ability might make you feel better, but it might not.
My ex used to cut when we started dating. It was terrifying. Eventually they cut too hard and we went to the hospital. After that they started doing self harm in other ways and it was scary every time. It never stopped. It seems so hard to deal with - I self harm but not like that, I'm self harming if I smoke or drink alone or starve myself and I recognize that, but something about the actual physical direct thing is for some reason much scarier (to me).
Anyway, if you have an unwanted erections you can squeeze your thighs a few times alternating. Should take it away. Not with your hands, just squeeze your thigh muscle. Erections are not forever, you will lose the spontaneous ones with HRT when you start taking it. It'll probably be quite the relief for you.
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I won't do that, but it's a good suggestion.
I'm sorry you had to deal with someone like me. I'm sure it is scary to watch happen. Especially if it's bad enough to go to the hospital.
I know, thank you though. I wasn't really awake long enough to do anything about it so it was just happening to me.
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:meow-hug: sorry you don't feel good either.
Eh it happens, I'm gonna try to use my powers to Git Gud and not have a dogshit day ✨
Hoping your day looks up a little too.
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I'm sorry you've woken up feeling bad, I hope it can lift some if you're busy today.
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Unfortunately it's probably going to be either overstimulating or boring as fuck, but thank you, I'm hoping so too.
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Hoping for the best for you eggy
self harm, edit
Don't need this shit here, did it a little bit but not bad. No means to be finished. I can't describe my feelings publicly. Thank you everyone who sent/sends me nice messages, it means a lot.
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no feeling is final, cutie. it will get better.