When I decided to host the mega again a bit ago, I had no idea what to make it about (of course). So it fell between two topics: a post on the importance of sleep, or a post on just how much I love Fire Emblem: The Sacred Echoes. Well, I felt like the importance of sleep was well-known, and could always wait for the next time I host a mega. I wanted to make sure I hit the Sacred Echoes iron while it's hot, because I've almost finished my play through at this point, and it might genuinely be one of the best games I have ever played.
Sacred Echoes feels so polished, considering it's a fan-made romhack of Sacred Stones, with the goal of bringing the 3DS game, Shadows of Valentia (SoV), to the GBA. Everything about the game aesthetically is very well-done, from the portraits, to the battle sprites, and literally anything else that could be thought of about a game. This includes new character writing, which helps the game in areas where Shadows of Valentia was a little, well, off. That's what I want to go over first, and although I've made a post before, I had only played a little bit of the game. Being at the end, I've noticed more things, and grown to appreciate this game even more than I already did.
Let's start off with the relevant (and interesting) bits: Sacred Echoes actually does a really good job at representing a variety of backgrounds, while also being diverse in a way that doesn't feel like it's simply to have a token character. This game doesn't suffer from the cracker curse, for example. Although most of the characters are white, there is more than one person of color (
) . In terms of LGBTQ+ representation, it's even better. There are many gay/lesbian characters, whose sexuality actually plays a role in the plot and how they interact with others. There's also an aroace character, Lukas, who goes through a whole arc of self-discovery in his support conversations (support Python). It's good stuff, and not things I would normally expect from a Fire Emblem game. I hesitate to bring up the (possibly) only trans character in the game, Jesse. HOLD ON, NO HESITATION AT ALL! I just decided to do more research, and I wasn't just projecting. He is 100% trans, and it's in supports, and it's relevant to his plot and backstory, so it's just like the rest of them, thank goodness, I was worried he was a token. So yeah, support Clive and Jesse. Good stuff, and good luck getting to the end of the game so they can actually meet, one fights for Alm and the other for Celica...
This is Jesse
Here's some dialogue between Clive and Jesse, in the context of a will:
Clive: Only the following will be yours - your mother's wardrobe, her jewelry box, and all corresponding contents.
Jesse: Urgh. Even from halfway in the grave he's trying to tell me what to wear. So yeah, he's still the same tyrant he always was. Hasn't changed a bit.
In terms of character background, it's more diverse than one would think, and it addresses the issue of feudal class. Not all of the characters are nobles, and one of the main characters is a commoner from a random village. The plot regularly deals with the fact that nobles and commoners do not get along. However, it does not try to redeem most nobles. If they aren't proving themselves with their actions, they're probably shitty. Even if they are supposedly "one of the good ones", there's usually some underlying prejudice that comes out when you might not expect it. I love it so much, and I am extremely impressed that the plot doesn't try to redeem nobility as a whole, but rather allows the noble characters within the cast to have character development that feels less like justification and more like re-education.
Pictured is the class traitor Lukas absolutely destroying Fernand
For other details about the story, I'll link my original post. I don't want to drag this on too long, and I mention most of the improvements there. It also includes where to find the patch for the game, and how to play the game for yourself. If you enjoy SRPGs, or are new to the genre, I recommend this game. It has an easy mode for the newbies, and hard mode for those of us who hate ourselves (/s), and a normal mode for everything in-between 
The Echoes cast is amazing, and I love how they interact with each other and the world. Each character stands out, and they feel unique in their relationships with the other characters. Even characters that suffer in SoV, like Faye and the Masked Knight (has a name but it's spoilers), benefit from the Sacred Echoes writing, making them actually enjoyable characters. The villains of the game are also great. I don't want to go too deep, because I don't want to spoil too much, but they aren't just pure evil, and for that I applaud the SoV writers. Berkut is probably the highlight of the game, being the heir to the throne of the empire. I am once again asking you to play the game, because IT IS SO GREAT, and I would not have expected these good of villains to pair with Alm and Celica, as well as their armies.
Pictured is the Masked Knight being a gay little guy. The other guy (Saber) is threatening his life...
Everything about the game design is also amazing. It's GBA Fire Emblem, so the animations are peak and the pixel art is stellar. The maps are improved from the original SoV maps, and they are definetly much better, and much less repetitive. Classes in the game are fun in how they work, each character being able to promote 2-3 times. Mages also work really uniquely and well in this game, with spells costing HP to cast. They learn spells as they level up, rather than by purchasing tomes, which makes for (in my opinion), better gameplay. Sacred Echoes also adds the GBA weapon and magic triangles!
All in all, Sacred Echoes is a great game, and even if you never ending up playing it, you now know of its existence. It stands out as a great romhack, as well as a great Fire Emblem game, AND it has the gay. Can it really get better than that?
If you want my original (and more in-depth) analysis, check out my original post. It's mostly about what Sacred Echoes improves upon the original Shadows of Valentia.
Hope you enjoyed my little nerd-out session, and have a good week everyone! 
DOWNLOAD SACRED ECHOES: https://www.dropbox.com/scl/fo/o9v75blehaid1re2i8qou/ALhV8LN1A59jdFIP6HYRH3c?rlkey=d7fl1m8qh9gl7ztmnim33euu1&e=1&dl=0
PATCH TO AN EXISTING SACRED STONES ROM: https://www.marcrobledo.com/RomPatcher.js/
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VERY long orientation/sexuality confusion post reflecting on stuff and trying to work out some identity feels bugging me
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I feel like in some of the sexuality changes were all part of coming to terms with not being cis, then various amounts of self acceptance increases and transition steps opening up different aspects of whatever my underlying attractions were but it still feels a bit confusing
I wouldn't have had the language or self awareness for it at the time, but looking back now I feel like my gender as a prepubescent kid was pretty much agender and didn't really internally make a distinction of gendered social norms of homosociality for platonic friendships and heteronormative crushes, it was all kind of the same thing. I got along with girls more in terms of communication style as friends and had some crushes on them too, but had the majority of my friends be boys because a lot of the girls treated me different than they treated one another and I was intuitively aware that I was being expected to try to "perform" normal boy-ness even though I wasn't exactly thrilled about all of it.
By my early teens, I was aware that I was definitely bi, and thought at first that having any attraction to boys as a "boy" must mean I'm actually completely gay, and knew a lot of boys at that age then were really homophobic, so I tried being Normal Teen and going on dates with girls a couple times. I actually did like some of those awkward early teens relationships but part of me had the feeling that it was The Right Thing To Do in order to Beat The Allegations, and spending more time with Teen Relationship GF and her friends started making me more aware of Gender and how I Was Not Lovin' It™️ and kinda wished I could change it.
Flash forward to late teens, coming to grips with being pan and how I felt that fit me best as a label, then starting to unpack my gender identity, at first as "hey I'm a girl lol" and trying to perform binary feminity, then realizing that was getting warmer than "kinda fruity boy" but still wasn't quite right, then landing on enby and gettin' a lil' weird with it.
Anyway, now I feel odd about whether or not I could end up in a serious romantic relationship with a man or not, and/or whether I'm physically compatible sexually with queer cis women or not.
orientation, dysphoria about sexuality
I haven't had a long-term BF before, and idk if dating a guy and a masc-er than me enby that both didn't quite work out soured me on a more masculine partner as a romantic prospect in the future or not. Sexually, I'm into it, but interpersonally I just feel a lot more comfortable being emotionally vulnerable and comfortable with women/femme-ish enbies. Even pretty queeny queer guys I've been with still do some guy shit that puts me off of pursuing more serious relationships sometimes.
With women/femmes, I feel safer emotionally and like cutesy romantic bullshit with them, but sexually feel uneasy that they don't really see me as myself and are just entertaining my identity to be nice. I can be really attracted to someone, and part of me is still always negatively comparing myself to her/them subconsciously and making myself sad, or fretting that they're internally trying to figure out "how male I am really" and that either being something they're apprehensive of in a more lesbian way or something they're more into In a straighter way and are keeping close to the chest to not offend or upset me. I know that kinda shit is probably almost entirely in my head and I should communicate more and trust people when they tell me they like me, but my brain is great at screaming at its own ass.
tl;dr
-find feminine ppl beautiful and love doing cutesy couple romantic shit and talking with them about feelings and stuff but get sad comparing myself with them and feel uncomfortable if I'm ever implicitly expected to be more masculine than I really am sexually. I don't want to "be the guy" in the bedroom ever, and my sexuality towards women can make me dysphoric.
-find (some) masculine people very attractive and find intimacy with them gender validation a lot of the time when it's like "them, definitely masculine and naturally comfortable with that being into me, who is clearly Not That" and that kinda being enough sometimes, but finding them lacking in interpersonal emotional range or their interiority? Idk
I have come here to write a long gay ass post and chew bubblegum, and I'm all out of bubblegum
Thanks for coming to my TedTalk
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Good post! Thank you for taking the time to put all this out it was a fascinating read. Your rumination is relatable in many ways showing how complex attraction and how one views oneself over time can vary and shows a lot into your inner workings which I always find interesting.
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Figuring out what makes me tick and what/how I feel about things can be as mysterious as it is for me trying to figure out other people sometimes lmao
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Relatable. It can be stressful at times and sometimes can take a lot and lot of pondering and ruminating to figure out things. It's nice when some things get revealed that's the fun part c:
granting that I am weird and acespec, but
I dunno, I mean your post & language tells me maybe you have, but I have had no worries about trans partners trying to figure out any alleged innate "maleness". Just spitballin :)
sex stuff
Have been with a trans man before and it was cool and mutually validating but he lived hours away and we had been platonic friends for awhile before stuff got lewd and it got complicated after that but yeah t4t relationships fuck imho
For what it's worth, I never had the kind of uneasy gender perceptions I have about myself when I'm with women/femmes about him, so you're probably right about a lot of it being internal confidence issues and issues relating to cis partners. Like, at no point was I ever thinking things about "how female is he actually" about him like I worried about myself in reverse, and I'm confident he didn't think that way about me either. I felt like he understood me very intuitively and vice versa, and I think I've only gotten that feeling of mutual understanding with him and a masc-ish AFAB enby partner I dated for awhile, so maybe cis partners are just not cut out for me?
Kinda lewd
I kinda wish I can meet a cis guy that gets me in the same way though, dudes kinda rock to me sometimes
I know it's probably unhealthy to seek personal validation and gender euphoria from how I relate to a partner, but I feel like my Not A Guy validation seeking
are pretty strong and can push me into situations that I probably wouldn't pursue if I didn't have them
Like, the bar can get relatively low if an attractive guy that I know isn't looking for anything serious gives me positive attention... I've never had a partner actually say or implicitly act like things were a conditional transaction of "treat me all femmy and sweet and I'll get you off" but that logic kinda runs in the background of my mind when I get attention from men or flirt with them
Being a queer commie, but looking away from red flags is kind of darkly funny
sex stuff
Yeah exactly right, and just the same you wouldn't think that way about a transfemme partner. It is rad to have that feeling of mutual understanding, it feels very safe, hence me swearing off cissies forever. You can too!! ✨ It'd be cool to never have gender worries like this, but it's not as if the cis can be trusted.
Kinda lewd
I mean, it can be bad if they're the only driving force and pushing you into situations you don't want, but gender validation/euphoria can also be an entirely valid and healthy part of good relationships. It's good to be mindful with guys, because oof, but y'know...
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Men do be oofy often
t4t
I'm strictly t4t, I've been abused by two previous cis partners. I was also in my worst state being put into the gender box by those partners. It took being t4t to actually be treated with any respect or to even know what being touched properly or truly understood was.