Those are just female incels. They have insane worldviews and horrible opinions which is why no one will love them. Sad all around.
"As someone who worked helping the homeless, let me go into a long diatribe about how homeless men are subhuman monsters." This person is sick. But it's very common for anti-homeless fashies to say 'oh, I work with them! So let me tell you...'
Yep. That's always the biggest issue when doing social work - if you come in to it with the idea that you're going to take some ego trip, you're going to be gone within the first few weeks, if not days.
I remember working with a college student when I was doing volunteer work at a group home, and this person saw one of the guys just urinate next to them. They were just appalled and never came back. It's like what the hell were you expecting?
Of course if you do stick around, it just makes you extremely jaded if you don't recognize that a lot of social work is a complete farce because the root of the issues is never going to get attacked in this system. I still know people that have been doing this type of work for years, but still don't really care for socialist thought to the point where they want the entire system dismantled.
Yeah, I did work with unhoused people and comrades and let me tell you this person is just cruel and ideologically liberal to fash. While I worked there I want to underline, that I did work with them in the sense of together, not in the sense of me being the superior position (though obviously I got a load of privileges).
The main thing I learned was how many misconceptions and bad patterns of behaviors I had. The fact that it could be me instead of them who are punished by society like that is self evident. It is one more reason a sentence like "They get one, meant are all of us" is true.
'female dating strategy' bro just like cuddle a guy you like always worked for me
FDS is a weird place. I think a lot of the women there have some kind of trauma which is understandable. Some of the posts are I guess decent advice for not falling for manipulative/abusive behavior by men etc. However most of it is TERF shit, horrible classism and weird stuff bordering on paranoia that comes off like they haven't interacted with a real person before. The classism isn't even subtle BTW, it is all over the place and so fucking explicit.
Edit: Also they have many similarities to incels. Like, they even have shit like LVM and HVM (low value male and high value male) going on which is very reminiscent the Becky/Stacey shit incels do.
You would only post in a subreddit called "dating strategy" if you were in a real, real weird place in your life
Commodifying human relationships to a game strategy or market force is an easy way to signal you have fucked morals or no social skills.
yeah ive been reading through it for amusement. im a bit sad for some of them that have been in abusive situations, it can really screw with your brain. they also talk about kinks as if they are very bad for women but they have been therapeutic for dealing with my PTSD, idk. you do need to have a very responsive partner that can read you well. they definitely are bad if a guy tries to pressure you into them, obviously, and thats pretty common unfortunately.
the entire subreddit is just an abuse reliving and refueling station, people that are victims there really need to bail on it. that shit can bust your brain open for months and it makes it easy for people to manipulate your world view and opinions
Yeah, I was just looking at it again and this is one of the most popular posts over there right now, just to show what I mean when I say some of the stuff there is just bizarre and confusing:
FDS is also incredibly useful for vetting women for friendships. I made the grievous mistake of overlooking a few red flags (like not calling when she said she was going to call) with a woman who I thought was becoming a close friend.
I set a boundary with her last week. She had been getting gradually less reliable so I said, “Hey, I understand that you are overwhelmed. But when I come to visit you next week I am really excited to attend a meteor shower. I don’t want my plans to hinge on yours so should I rent a car or have a backup plan?” She insisted that she wanted to join and that worst case scenario I could just borrow her car. I let her know up front that I am compassionate that she has a lot of stressors right now but I needed her to respect that this was important to me and that I would be upset if I missed this....(this is also why I am increasingly hesitant to becoming friends with women who have young children. They tend to think that a childless woman’s interests/hobbies are frivolous.)
Fast forward to me flying out of state to spend time with her and her toddler son. Her energy was bizarre from my arrival so I asked her about it and she insisted that there was nothing wrong but she had a huge fight with her sister so now her 2 year old son would be joining us for the 4 hour car ride. I was happy about it because he is delightful and I was unfazed. On Wednesday morning, I again gave her an out. “Hey, I can just drive myself if this is feeling like too much.” She insisted even though we didn’t leave until like 2 PM. On the car ride up I offered to alternate driving with her and she said she was nervous about me not being on her insurance. 🧐 we get to the lovely hotel that I paid for in full. I also paid for gas and $150 dinner for the 3 of us. The next morning she was so unpleasant to me. I wanted to say something but we had a 4 hour car drive back so I figured I would wait for a better time. She had the energy to be kind to her son but I felt like she resented me for “having” to make the trip. At first I was trying to be compassionate because I know that she has been under a lot of stress but after 2 hours of her sighing loudly and not attempting to be at all pleasant to me, I got pissed.
I was explicit with her that this was important to me, I offered her 3 different outs, I paid for her and her son to have a nice experience, I missed the meteor shower and now she is acting like a completely garbage person to me? I was supposed to stay at her home but I asked her to drop me off at a local hotel. When we arrived I said “Thank you.” Waved goodbye to her son and stomped off. I’m extra livid now thinking about how I hostessed her for 5 days at my home in California for her birthday and pulled out all the stops. I also had to spend more money on 2 nights that I planned to stay at her place. I just would NEVER in a million years treat a guest that way unless they were horrendous. This is another reason we must always have our own money.
I am done making excuses for people who think I am an emotional punching bag. Her inability to regulate her feelings was completely toxic to me. I have a soft spot in my heart for single mothers but now I want nothing to do with her and I am seriously tempted to write her a letter and block.
Other red flag behavior was that she constantly wanted to talk about dating and would ask for diet/nutrition advice and then never listen. I had to call her in for flaking on a phone call because she was on a 45 minute call with a guy she had never met from Hinge.🤮 I’m still seething from this. Please learn from my mistake. Pickmes are borderline abusive and they will use you just as badly as a LVM will.
Like, none of this even has anything to do with pickmes. This is literally just a post about her stressed single mom friend being unpleasant. But this is apparently enough for this person to literally seethe with rage, consider completely blocking her friend, and write a massive rant talking about how it is abuse and pickme behavior somehow. This is not exactly a healthy response to your friend being kind of shitty. Also apparently another thing that makes her STILL seethe with rage is that she talked with a guy she considered dating instead of calling her once? Ummm alright?
And the comments are just a bizarre circle jerk. There is one comment talking about how asking for diet advice and not taking it is a huge red flag, because it means they will never ever listen to you or stop being a pickme. That person brings up the example of a friend who asked for meal plans and exercise advice and she supposedly didn't take the advice, but she fucked up her ankle while running (which she had told her to do so I guess she did take the advice?) which... Means something? I don't fucking know. Apparently she got so mad her friend sprained her ankle that she missed her wedding. Like wtf.
It seems like most people there are either incredibly narcissistic or have some kind of bad trauma that makes them react really weird to some situations. Either way it can't be very healthy to be there.
trauma can make you do whack shit tbh, though hooking yourself into a subreddit like that that prods your trauma all the time and gives you terrible coping advice would probably make it worse
like one time i stared at a wall for four days and genuinely enjoyed it, i think thats weirder than that
I don't KNOW if they're traumatized but it seems like some of them may be, idk. The first post reminds me of being depressed and insecure and overinterpreting every sign I noticed. I have no clue though how you end up like the other person making that comment. It's like she's getting mad at her own headcannon. That's what the sub seems like, traumatized women hanging around with weird hostile narcissists and everyone getting submerged into misery as a result. It's honestly more sad than incel forums because at least you can laugh at how deranged, whiny and petty some of the incel stuff is whereas this is just sad and weird. And very classist.
FDS causes a feedback loop with the manosphere subreddits where now they will post something about women hating homeless men. Then FDS will respond back to them.
Can we somehow isolate these people from the rest of society and just let them have at it from behind their keyboards till the sun goes out?
A woman who goes out of her way to please men and attract their attention while throwing other women under the bus. So basically absolutely nothing to do with that post.
I was there for the first ~5 months. I don’t think I would ascribe “reactionary” to it, it was half misandry posting and half not bad dating advice.
Like yeah if your spouse puts in 0 effort and doesn’t make you feel loved you should move on. No, all men are not pedo-rapists, if they were why do you choose to date them?
Fds is a terf sub/pipeline to ovarit masquerading as a dating sub
This person clearly hates homeless people so why is she even volunteering? If that is even true anyways.
Assaulting a police officer
They shouldn't be homeless, they should be given medals
you don't actually have to take liberal feminism seriously. you don't have to fall for carceral individualist moralizing hiding behind aggrieved misandry.
That said I don't think I've heard of /r/FemaleDatingStrategy, but if it's anything like its male counterpart subs it's cynical femcels gone mad with loneliness.
I work at a houseless shelter, so i get to cite my profession when calling this person a complete piece of shit!
This person is a complete piece of shit
