Like every time someone posts a study about how it's bad, you get a huge flood of people saying stuff like "I was spanked as a kid, yet I'm fine".
This is why we shouldn't spank kids. We shouldn't sexualize them like this
About to head to the comments to defend spanking :sicko-yes:
Reading the words, "as a kid" :sicko-wistful:
I think it's one of two things:
- They're chuds who think beating people into submission is the right and correct thing to do.
And/or
- They experienced corporeal punishment as kids and think if they acknowledge that was wrong/damaging of their parents/guardians to do, they're admitting that their parents are bad people or that they're "damaged" and "lesser" in some way from having experienced it.
Your second point happens to describe exactly why so many people defend circumcision too. The parallels are strikingly similar.
This is pretty much all hardships isnt it?
"I had to work 14 hour days when I was young so you should too!"
"I had to walk to school in the blizzard up a hill in the ice so you should too!"
"When I was young we didnt have birth control so the young people shouldnt have it now either!"
Instead of having the response of: "That shit was horrible and no one should have to face it ever again." that normal people should have.
Yeah. I think to those people, they have to rationalize their parents traumatizing them in some way. It's really sad and fucked up. The child-brain rationalizes the trauma into thinking they deserved it or it bettered them in some way, and the adult brain either addresses that or keeps the rationalization going.
"I worked hard to pay for my school, so school loan debt shouldn't be cancelled for anyone."
Yeah there's alot of masculinity/penis psychology going on there.
“I was spanked as a kid, yet I’m fine”.
Are you though? :hopium:
Those parents who approve of corporal punishment contend that they only spank as a last resort, do it only for serious misbehavior and only when they are calm. But the recordings often revealed the opposite. Parents seemed angry when striking their child, they did it reactively and for minor transgressions.
On average, spankings happened only 30 seconds after a conflict started, and half the time parents sounded angry before any conflict began. The study is in the Journal of Family Psychology.
Previous studies using parental self-reports have estimated that parents spank about 18 times per year. But this study using real-time audio found the median rate to be 18 times per week—and this is among people who knew they were being monitored. That means that among the mothers who spanked, half of them spanked more than 18 times per week.
:jesus-christ:
A great reminder that self-reported surveys are often just surveys of what people think is socially acceptable.
18 times per week—and this is among people who knew they were being monitored.
:sadness-abysmal:
When education is not liberating, the dream of the oppressed is to become the oppressor, or something.
Idk how the fuck schools were allowed to straight up beat little kids with massive wooden paddles with goddamn air holes so they could slap it harder. Shit is wild. My dad also told me stories of the nuns in his catholic middle school beating peoles knuckles with rulers till they bled. Fucking insanity
I went to school in India as a child. Teachers would punish you in the most fucked up ways. You’d hold out your hands and they’d just thwack it with a ruler, sometimes they’d get other kids in the class to slap you. If they felt cheeky they’d make you squat in front of the class for the entire period until your knees gave up.
And then I’d get beat by my mom when I’d come home for school, for getting beat by the teacher. I think in many parts of Asia(including in China) they still use corporal punishment. It explains why so many are such reactionary shitheads.
Dang, that's super rough stuff. Ugh it makes me sad that this stuff is still somehow okay in the the year of our lord (2021). Thanks for sharing your story though o7
Any idea how much of that is a relic of colonialism vs. pre-dating br*tish rule?
Making the kid go outside to pick the switch they're struck with was popular too.
see also 'rule of thumb'
Oh shit yeah! I remember when my grandpa jokingly told me to cut him a switch and I was like, "you want me to be electrocuted??" Then he explained it all and how his dad made him do that and he always resented it. Also belts! They'd take off their belts and whip kids. So much fucked up stuff
Belts, kettle cables, wooden spoons, open palm, closed fist, I learned to wear multiple layers early on lmao. Some people seem to see kids as property rather than individual people, its fucking weird
Sorry for tmi! I've tried to understand the hows and whys for a long while because of it
No don't be sorry, it's quite alright to share those things. It helps people a lot usually, plus others here might be able to relate. It's just a sad reality that still exists in some homes.
Grandpa
I went to grade school in the 90s and kids got spanked with paddles by the principals there (though this was a religious school not a public one).
I went over to a friend's house who had a very old mom (for our age) and she was a retired teacher. Well, I'll never forget seeing her wall in her damn living room had maybe 7 or so different types of paddles hanging up on her wall. One of them was even Christmas themed. Just so weird
One of them was even Christmas themed
This is one of the most cursed things I've ever heard of
In addition to the reasons already listed, I think a big part of it is the obsession American parents - especially Evangelical and Catholic parents - have with viewing their children as their own personal property. Saying kids have inherent rights like the right to not be spanked implies the parents' rule is not absolute. These kinds of parents want the right to shape their kids in whatever way they want (usually just to be miniature version of themselves) so they think they have a god-given right to spank.
Also the US/west is heavily pro-punishment rather than rehabilitative. The child deserves to suffer because he mildly inconvenienced me. That is the only solution and the only proper way to raise a kid.
People are utterly fucked up on this stuff. They think that losing their temper at their kids and using fear and intimidation to "keep them in line" around the fucking house is some kind of virtue.
Imagine being the troll that logged onto hexbear.info to defend spanking lol
Anyway now that transphobe is gone, my parents spanked me and it deffo fucked me up. Especially because sometimes they wouldn't even tell me why they were doing it, so i just assumed something was wrong with me and i was inherently bad, and then developed lifelong anxiety and a perfectionist complex with cripppling low self-esteem, which made me an easy target for abusers.
Do not recommend
I finally got to play with one! It was delightful.
Also, same. My mom was too little to spank me, from a certain point, and would just slap me around.
it's easy when you are taught to react to most negative situations with violence, usually by being the subject of violence. If you are beaten as a child routinely, you are taught that the correct way to treat a subordinate(this can be a child, a lower-level coworker, a wife or any woman, depending on context) when they misbehave is with violence. "Misbehave" can mean annoy or just be around, depending on how abusive the beater is.
brain can normalise practically anything if you try hard enough
I didn't think much about it 5 years ago, but now that I'm a dad the idea of hitting my kid is repulsive and I don't get how another parent could disagree.
Just the idea of it feels instinctively wrong to me now.
Corporal punishment might honestly be a big part of the reason why so many older people are complete shitheads
Survivors bias, desire for authority over someone in their lives, pent up aggression and the BIBLE SEZ ITS GUD
Literally the reason why it's still legal in my country is because of people quoting the spare the rod line from the bible.
Yes I know you said /s but still thought I'd clarify my sass
You see this shit normalized in Latino communities too, saying that we’re more well-behaved because of it. See: chancla memes, getting el cinto, being afraid of your mom, etc. All it did for me was make me weary of authority figures and resent my dad. And I got spanked the least out of my cousins, who all act out worse than I ever did.
No idea. If I ever have kids (unlikely) and hit/spank them, I deserve to be shot.
I was beaten as a kid. It's very bad folks.
