Discuss.
There's a contingency of neurodivergent people on the right that weaponize the term against neurodivergent leftists or just anyone neurodivergent, including their own. The unsaid 'pass' that's granted for a slur for those affected by it, such as the reclamation effort regarding the n-word, is born of a strong sense of solidarity and general desire within the community affected by it to soften the term's power and reclaim communal usage of the term.
I don't know if there's any way to recontextualize the r-word that isn't vitriolic and spiteful, because it's a well-defined wholly-negative targeted descriptor, not a generalized vaguely-negative group descriptor as is the case for other reclamation efforts, and I don't think there is a general solidarity amongst neurodiverse people that would even allow for the slur to be seen as wholly negative by the neurodivergent community because unfortunately there is a frighteningly large contingency of neurodivergent fascists that fell down the chan pipeline whilst wanting to discuss their own niche interests.
As of now, I'm personally extremely uncomfortable justifying anyone using the term, as an unfortunate recipient of it, and I remain unconvinced of a broader reclamation of it being on the horizon.
I personally don't like using it. It just doesn't feel good.
I like the phrasing of “get” like I’m the one with keys to the slur closet and I’m double checking the clipboard for who’s allowed to take out which slurs and for which purposes
responsible slur owners make sure to purchase a slur safe, especially if there are children living in the house
almost every etiquette discussion about who is "allowed" to say which words is built on flawed assumptions. there is no one stopping you. there is no authority policing your slur usage. there are no language rules passed down to us from atop mount sinai from social justice yahweh, no parents to wash our tongues out with soap.
the actual relevant questions are: what do we gain? who do we harm? someone who we decide is not "allowed" (perhaps because they don't have certain symptoms or one of a number of diagnoses) might have still been abused with that word. someone who is "allowed" might say r*tard, and their saying it might still trigger someone else's trauma from the neglect and degradation of living in a cruelly ableist society. but does that negate the slur sayer's aspiration to "reclaim" the slur, to rob it of some of its strength and glory in their imperviousness to the verbal abuse of obnoxious assholes? do we have to decide that one or the other's feelings and lived experience and identity are "invalid"?
that said it's not one of the fun ones for me and i almost exclusively use it for compulsive self castigation.
I'm going to pre-emptively not get stuck into this and then come back tomorrow and see how many people in the comments have been banned for extraordinarily bad takes.
people with severe forms of these conditions have restricted capacity to understand what you're asking, to participate in the discussion and make their preferences known. Why would you ever not prioritize the most marginalized?
Their caretakers and advocates have made it crystal clear that they don't like the word. As far as I'm concerned that settles it.
As long as whoever you're talking to knows you're neurodivergent I don't see how there would be anything wrong with it, but I would definitely refrain from using it otherwise. I wouldn't want any other neurodivergent folks to be hurt by hearing me use it without the full context.
No. N* and F* both have uses as in-group signifiers that are used positively among members of the ingroup. R* has only ever had negative meanings and was an is used heavily by an outgroup to marginalize and oppress neurodivergent people. The usage and culture around different kinds of slurs is not transferrable.
No, if you want to use it yourself/ with ND friends who are cool with it I mean, you do you, but I think it'd be uncool to try to reclaim it more broadly cause I don't want to see that shit and I think many others feel similarly