I phrased it badly, those are two separate thoughts. "wow I really need to come out to people" at the same time as "am I even trans?" and it's just like :thonk: how can I be doubting if I'm trans at the same time as wanting/feeling like I need to come out. Cis people don't come out.

Yea it is a skill, and one I'm pretty terrible at. Thanks, I really hope it does get easier. It doesn't feel like it.