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  • WalrusDragonOnABike [they/them]@lemmy.today
    ·
    4 months ago
    spoiler

    Before my egg started to really crack, my brother made a comment along the lines of "I don't get why certain types of BDSM porn exists" because he was thinking about the generic male-dom type stuff I assume. My response was like "but what if you imagine yourself as the sub?" and I think his reaction was something like "I guess :shrug:".

    I think it was kinda surprising to me that he did not seem to even considered that someone could watch it from the woman's perspective. Like I get toxicly masculine dudes would never admit to such, but my brother is a bit of a twink/very much against machismo stuff and open to these kinds of topics.

    This probably happened very shortly before egg started cracking and probably served as the catalyst for it eventually happening - which I considered when I saw an NB subreddit meme about how NBies are lucky because they can switch perspectives when watching porn.... which I'd probably have ignored as being hyperbole if it weren't for that recent interaction.

    Also, after cracking, I got confirmation that perspective switching wasn't something he does: when I came out to him, he was skeptical (in a way I wanted him to be <3) and the thing for him that seemed the most "definitely not a cis thing" was that.

    So yeah... cissies definitely seem pretty auto*sexual from my limited experience talking with them (my cousin also seems to only take the male perspective, but he doesn't like sexual discussions, so I don't really trust him to say if he didn't).

    • QueerCommie [she/her, fae/faer]
      ·
      4 months ago

      NBies are lucky because they can switch perspectives when watching porn....

      Porn bad. But also, true..? Erotica…

      So yeah... cissies definitely seem pretty auto*sexual from my limited experience talking with them

      Huh. I recently heard being Bi is basically being attracted to like yourself and other genders, and I’m like who doesn’t do that unless they’re gay? How do people live being unattractive in their own eyes? I liked how I looked no transition, but I also like how I look more being fem. I’m pan. Idk where I’m going, so I’ll stop.

      • ashinadash [she/her]
        ·
        4 months ago

        Porn bad.

        Nah it can be cool and rad. Like any other sort of work, if it's not coercive and something you rely on for survival and there's no managerial fuck above you, (in this case the atrocious porn industry and all the misogyny and such inherent) porn can be cool and rad and a good thing.

          • ashinadash [she/her]
            ·
            4 months ago

            You could always learn a little basic bit, most people aren't gonna kill you for asking.

            interviewer Quick! What are your thoughts on sex workers and porn actresses, if Porn Bad?

            • QueerCommie [she/her, fae/faer]
              ·
              4 months ago

              I’m always learning and asking questions, I just also have opinions. My second hand opinion is prostitution sucks and the people exploited in it are victims of patriarchal capitalism as any other worker and just as human and valid. The industry can be particularly exploitative, and the social stigma makes it worse, but I understand why some privileged people would enjoy it. Porn is bad because it’s patriarchal and distorts people’s views of sex, not because it’s immoral.

              • ashinadash [she/her]
                ·
                4 months ago

                Oh nice, pretty good actually. Seen too many swerf takes before so that's good to see kel-bliss

    • ashinadash [she/her]
      ·
      edit-2
      4 months ago
      spoiler

      This goes so hard. I wish I coulda had this realisation ages ago instead of right now!! Such a cool thing to think about pre-eggcrack. The rigid autosexual nature of the cis is so funny to me now that I'm thinking abt it. I like that someone made a meme abt it, definitely one of the more unique distinguishers as far as "I am a genderlib" vs "I have thought about my gender a lot n read theory" goes. Also lol @ your goofy twink brother.