Sending good vibes to all of my trans comrades cat-trans

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  • khizuo [ze/zir]
    ·
    edit-2
    4 months ago
    autism talk

    ... so I'm realizing that irl, I really don't mask my autism at all, lol. I blurt things out at inappropriate times, I'm both exceedingly honest and exceedingly gullible, I don't make eye contact, I visibly act a little weird. I do not script conversations, I do not force eye contact, I do not try to copy behaviors and movements. I only fooled myself into thinking I mask because I like meeting people and I'm able to be friendly on first impression. I think I appear very neurotypical, but clearly my perception is off because if I really acted as neurotypical as I thought I did, I wouldn't have been the weird loner classmate/coworker all my life.

    I also thought that infodumping was not something I did, but my friends told me the other day that yeah, I do in fact infodump. I think it's because in high school, I just... really didn't get the opportunity to infodump much. But I always thought it was because I just wasn't good enough at remembering facts and stuff. It was only until I caught myself talking about veganism and communism and art and DIY for hours that I realized that yes, I do actually infodump, at least when I'm given the space to.

    Having autism realizations 3 years after first taking the tests? It's more likely than you think, folks.

    • magi [null/void]M
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      edit-2
      4 months ago

      Glad things are working for you with your friends, nice to have people to infodump with squirtle-jam

      I don't mask either ^^

    • sneak100
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      edit-2
      19 days ago

      deleted by creator

      • khizuo [ze/zir]
        ·
        4 months ago

        I could just about make a somewhat positive first impression (if even that), but then people would slowly drift away. After two weeks I was in the loner/loser camp whatever I was doing.

        This has been exactly my experience my whole life. School, summer camp, job, everywhere. It used to bother me a lot, I struggled with it for years, but now that I understand that it stems from me being autistic I am a lot less bothered by it.