Inspired by this dorky exchange I had, thank u BountifulEggnog.

I want to know what your gender means to you, how you define it, what it means for you to "be" that gender and how you define it. Don't fuss about 'correct definitions' or anything, this is about your experience, I want to know what it means to you. How you relate to that gender, perceive it.

Genders have a social construction aspect and is very subjective, so I think people's subjective, personal views of their own are both important and interesting. Inquiring mind wants to know! interviewer

I'll share some of mine I guess.

I was a trans woman until the contradictions sharpened to a razor's edge after reading Gender Outlaw and The Gender Accelerationist Manifesto. My brain got cracked in half. I have always hated the effects testosterone would have on my body, so estrogen was a given, but while I do identify with certain things that are commonly associated with being a woman... if nothing is inherently gendered, what even is a gender? niko-concern I had a whole little episode about it in the megathread once.

As I went on from there, I realised that while I like certain things about "being a woman", equally I found I'd been sort of stifled by trying to fit into the social role. The women I have always related to most are the cis autistic women who basically yeet presentation in favour of dressing for sensory comfort. Almost kinda non binary, in a way... The more I interrogated binary gender in relation to myself, the more I dug up stuff like this. Also I didn't really like that "woman" is associated with cis people a lot, I really like the trans part of my identity, feel a lot of love for it. I've felt freer and mentally clearer and truer to myself as a Non Binary Transfem, it's cool and funny. What does it mean to me? It represents my goofy sometimes-androgynous presentation, my lack of cissie gender, how being neurodiverse influences my view, being a funny noody goblin. Share yours =)

  • autism_2 [any, it/its]
    ·
    4 months ago

    Gender has always felt like a label with no relevance to me, like what football team I support (none, I don't watch it.) I'm happier keeping my identity ambiguous, but I have made peace with presenting as my agab irl because it's easier. I imagine being vulnerable and putting in the effort to 'pass' as nonbinary (whatever that means) only to still have people not get it would hurt, a lot more than keeping my real self hidden from everyone but the people closest to me.

    • ashinadash [she/her]
      hexagon
      ·
      4 months ago

      Is it even possible to 'pass' as nb? Is that when you get they/them'd because someone is unsure?

      • autism_2 [any, it/its]
        ·
        4 months ago

        Hold on, I'm thinking... maybe I need to wear a sticker that says 'Hello, my name is nonbinary'? They/them knuckle tats?

      • WalrusDragonOnABike [they/them]@lemmy.today
        ·
        4 months ago

        Is it even possible to ‘pass’ as nb?

        Maybe if you're like a slime or something along those lines? /j

        Perhaps if you get nullification surgeries and live in a nudist colony, you could relatively easily pass as an NB.

        • ashinadash [she/her]
          hexagon
          ·
          4 months ago

          Being a slime would be fuckin based. Getting nullification and living in a nudist colony is also kinda based.