My parents told me that Santa was a fun pretend guy based on a real guy who lived a long time ago and gave presents to people. So it was OK to sing silly songs and pretend, but none of it was real. But they also made it clear that some families like to pretend harder than we do and it was NOT OK to tell the kids at school that Santa wasn't real. I think that's the best way to handle it--I still enjoyed Christmas as much as any kid, but I didn't have that moment of realizing that my parents had been lying to me. And the way they framed it didn't really make me see other parents as lying to their kids either, just that they were playing a game of pretend together in a different way than my family did.

the trust issue is no the bigger problem it kinda creates this real weird situation because kids are not aware of economics and stuff so it really just reinforces the meritocracy idea on the kids I AM RECEIVING A GIFT BECAUSE MR NICK HAS WATCHED EVERYTHING I'VE DONE AND HAS DEEMED ME WORTH IT AND also if a poor kid does not get something it was because they were on his wicked list but i understand why people do it my family actually told me when i started doubting but said "hey just go along your lil sis really loves christmas" and that convinced me

Anyone living in a capitalist hegemony should have trust issues. Uncritical support for Comrade Claus

If Santa Claus existed there'd be a mountain of evidence that he's kind of a dick to poor kids.

So in the USSR we had (and in many of its successor states today still have) "Grandfather Frost." Same decorated conifer tree, same dressed up dude (though just as likely to be in blue as red), same presents.

The difference is there is no naughty/nice list. You're a child, you get presents - and not just from your family, but also your (pre)school, your children's library, your parents' workplace, wherever you attend a celebration. (Of course, with more capitalism, the emphasis is turning now more toward people buying presents for themselves, rather than public institutions distributing them.) There are children's stories where Grandfather Frost does deal in justice, good for good, bad for bad, but in your own life it's presents guaranteed for all.

The questionable aspect of making up stories for children is still there, but anybody being left without presents is seen as an injustice.

Alternatively, finding out Santa isn't real helps prepare you for breaking out of other capitalist lies.

Santa's not real? What next, you gonna tell me I'm not being paid the full value of my labour?!?

Edit: Yes, the subject of this comment is an 11 y/o coal miner. The small frame means they can get into tighter mineshafts. Or so I'm told.

yeah feel a bit like a joyless commie but I think lying to your kids is bad. I think just saying it's a special day of the year where we show our love through gift giving is enough.

But also don't feel that strongly about it to struggle session over. Like maybe telling it as a general "once upon a time" story is good.

Also I'm like 10 years away from even potentially having kids so my opinion doesn't matter much lol

Santa Claus can be a way to teach your kid in a wink-and-nod way about society's shared delusions. many parents put too much effort into trying to make it believable, when it seems more important to help them see through it

I may be biased, but I'm actually thankful that my parents raised me to believe in Santa. I'm not sure where I picked this up, but for years I believed that Santa was God's righthand man - I even prayed to him when I had night terrors. I had a lot of weird religious rituals due to OCD. When my dad told me the whole thing was a sham, the first thing I asked was "Well what about God?"

I know it's stupid, but that was a big moment for me. I pretty much believed everything adults told me at face value up until that point, and seeing my entire worldview exposed as a lie taught me to question authority at a young age. I honestly might have grown up as a bootlicker without that experience.

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My parents did it in a really half hearted way, so that when they asked me to write down what I wanted from Grandpa Frost as a 5 year old, I remember thinking "oh I'm so sure it isn't real but it'd be nice if it was real, so let's just all go along with it". We continued it with even less effort re the tooth fairy, which my parents only found out about from me (and I found out from school). Idk I liked it. Like we're all playing along "just in case" or because "wouldn't it be nice"

I think it's okay to teach kids to question the things adults tell them. Shout out to the Dutch who just drop their kids off in the middle of a forest to fuck with them

Gonna play the devils advocate and say that maybe kids need some of this stuff as sort of building blocks to being a person. If one takes the tabula rasa approach to child-rearing then they need to be taught shit and allowed time to grow and grasp the things in their mind. Literally gonna quote some Pratchett on this one

I never believed in Santa, and once ruined a friend's day by telling him the presents marked "from Santa " were just from his parents. I was 10 or 11, I think?

my ex's mom is very christian, and when her youngest kids were 8 & 6 she told them santa wasn't real because she was afraid if she waited until they were older then they might think she was lying about god being real too lol. I do kinda miss the magic of being a kid and believing in santa, I fucking hate Christmas now