• TerminalEncounter [she/her]
      ·
      1 year ago

      Yeah if they communicate by dissecting the person's brain and then don't put them back together... fuck can we pick all 4???

      • Random Dent@lemmy.ml
        ·
        1 year ago

        If it had to be one I think I'd send Musk. Bill Gates is kind of a spent force, he's in his "be philanthropic to make up for all the shady shit I did", so I think he's done most of the harm he's going to do. Bezos is a close second pick, but I think he's less actively bonkers than Musk. Zuckerberg I think is an alien anyway so they probably wouldn't take him.

        • LanyrdSkynrd [comrade/them, any]
          ·
          1 year ago

          Gates's philanthropy is doing harm, though. His foundation funds school choice initiatives and lobbied against COVID vaccine patent wavers for poor countries. He was also a good friend of Jeffrey Epstein.

          • UnicodeHamSic [he/him]
            ·
            1 year ago

            Gates knows it. He is secretly buying up farmland. He is a reset guy. He wants to kill off the poor and live in a palace in New zealand.

          • Joe@discuss.tchncs.de
            ·
            edit-2
            1 year ago

            IIRC, the reason was that it wouldn't bring covid vaccines to poor countries in a timely fashion, which would likely result in delays and more death. Pragmatic.

            Honestly, a lot of people write shit about Gates to try to discredit him, and lots of people lap it up. He's a bogeyman.

            Funnily enough, he was the devil incarnate for this Linux user back in the 90s... nowadays he often comes across as the only adult in the room.

            • Thordros [he/him, comrade/them]
              ·
              1 year ago

              IIRC, the reason was that it wouldn't bring covid vaccines to poor countries in a timely fashion, which would likely result in delays and more death. Pragmatic.

              Are you doing a bit? This is exactly what happened because there weren't any patent waivers granted at the peak of the pandemic. Low income countries still have devastatingly low vaccination rates as a result.

              • Joe@discuss.tchncs.de
                ·
                1 year ago

                You are still assuming that some third party/parties could/would magic a cheap effective vaccine clone into existence at the time it was most needed and most profitable to do otherwise.

                Also, the perceived value of vaccination for immediate personal health has waned now that most people have caught covid, so I expect the number of recent vaccination shots to be consistently lower throughout the world.

                • Thordros [he/him, comrade/them]
                  ·
                  1 year ago

                  No. You don't get to weasel your way out of defending your central argument. You said:

                  IIRC, the reason was that it wouldn't bring covid vaccines to poor countries in a timely fashion, which would likely result in delays and more death. Pragmatic.

                  Defending patent exclusivity will bring covid vaccines to poor countries in a timely fashion. This will save lives. Very pragmatic. You said that.

                  So, why are first dose vaccination rates in poorer countries still less than half of the full vaccination rate in wealthy nations? It's because no timely vaccine deployment occurred. Delays and death were not prevented. Gates' supposed magnanimous goal failed spectacularly by any reasonable measure. The only thing he protected was billions in profits at the expense of human lives.

                  You also don't understand what a patent waiver even means:

                  You are still assuming that some third party/parties could/would magic a cheap effective vaccine clone into existence at the time it was most needed and most profitable to do otherwise.

                  A patent doesn't mean, "Sorry folks! We cured this disease, so nobody else can make their own cure! Too bad, so sad!" It means they've published how to make something, but can legally bar anybody from reproducing their work. It's an instruction manual you aren't allowed to follow, to protect their profits. A patent waiver removes that restriction.

                  If you do understand that, and are instead arguing that the global South is just too stupid to be able to follow instructions, well... then we fundamentally disagree on the foundations of ethics and humanity, and I don't want to ever speak with you again.

                  • Joe@discuss.tchncs.de
                    ·
                    1 year ago

                    I understand the patent system very well, albeit in another context. I support much shorter/stricter criteria for patents in general, as well as waivers where it makes sense.

                    The argument is that nobody (no person, no company, nor government) would have mass produced or distributed cloned/copied covid vaccines to these areas faster at that point in time (even if approval processes were largely waived).

                    https://www.nytimes.com/2022/03/23/health/covid-africa-deaths.html discusses some of the complexities in Africa, if you are interested. I agree that the response could have been better, but it could also have been worse. Other places had their own issues.

                    I don't think the current vaccination % means much, given that most people on the planet have been exposed to it, often multiple times.

                    Why would anyone who gets a mild case every few months bother to vaccinate? There are reasons, but not many that resonate.

        • UlyssesT
          ·
          edit-2
          15 days ago

          deleted by creator

    • NPa [he/him]
      ·
      1 year ago

      we made first contact wrong - as a joke

    • C2N14 [he/him]
      ·
      1 year ago

      His family's finally here to bring him home

  • uralsolo
    ·
    edit-2
    1 year ago

    deleted by creator

          • VOLCEL_POLICE [it/its]B
            ·
            1 year ago

            Show

            The VOLCEL POLICE are on the scene! PLEASE KEEP YOUR VITAL ESSENCES TO YOURSELVES AT ALL TIMES.

            نحن شرطة VolCel.بناءا على تعليمات الهيئة لترويج لألعاب الفيديو و النهي عن الجنس نرجوا الإبتعاد عن أي أفكار جنسية و الحفاظ على حيواناتكم المنويَّة حتى يوم الحساب. اتقوا الله، إنك لا تراه لكنه يراك.

            volcel-police

  • LiberalSoCalist@lemm.ee
    ·
    1 year ago

    I nominate Joe Rogan because him doing a live podcast with aliens on their spaceship would be the funniest final hour of our lives

  • BeamBrain [he/him]
    ·
    1 year ago

    If nothing else, they understand who's really in charge

  • kristina [she/her]
    ·
    1 year ago

    It should be zucc, he should be better at speaking with his own kind

  • Utter_Karate [he/him, comrade/them]
    ·
    1 year ago

    Zuck. He would negotiate a deal with those aliens. We would live, but we would have to stop using toilets, instead mailing our shit in plastic bags to some kind of central processing plant. Then a few years down the line we would find out that the aliens didn't ask for this and it was a clause added into the deal by Zuckerberg.

    • ChaosMaterialist [he/him]
      ·
      1 year ago

      melon-musk , for these hilarious reasons:

      1. He's clearly the worst of the four
      2. The other snubbed three will be BIG MAD. See #1
      3. Elon will screw this up.
      4. He might screw it up by asking his fans!
  • D61 [any]
    ·
    1 year ago

    Zuckerberg.

    I'd hope that the aliens would view him as alien enough to assume that we'd already been invaded and either 1) no need to re invade us for fear of starting war with some unknown alien civilization or 2) liberate us from the rest of the rich people who look more like people than zuck.

  • has_com [he/him]
    ·
    1 year ago

    This question is so bad it circles back and becomes a great question

  • Mokey [none/use name]
    ·
    edit-2
    1 year ago

    Id just represent humanity honestly im pretty cool

    The aliens would think zuck is one of them

    Or me and the aliens would team up and investigate zucks butthole in a scientific way