kinda a downer thing about abuse also SEX MENTIONED
so i broke up with my partner of about a year about a month ago
i learned that after cutting communication with them from a mutual friend that they had called me transmisogynist bc i was attributing them "standing up for themselves" as a threat because of me thinking of them as a dangerous cis man. obviously i did not think this, and the "standing up" for themselves was them yelling and insulting me, usually over perceived slights that were not what i was trying to communicate.
while we were dating they had also made a lot of transphobic comments towards me and other AFAB trans people. like saying AFAB trans people have it infinitely easier than AMAB trans people and that there was little point to me topping cos i'd have to use a strap.
One of the things I hate most about lefty spaces is the weaponization of social justice language. Sorry you had to deal with that first hand from a cynical abuser.
I also hate divisions in the queer community. AFAB and AMAB are part of the same struggle. Even if I accepted that it's easier for AFAB to transition, my thought would be "GOOD. I'm happy for you." Any queer movement would be incomplete without you.
sex
Using a strap is fucking based. Wtf is wrong with this person? Both cis women and trans women (and many other genders) enjoy using straps. Why would that disqualify anyone from topping?
You did the right thing getting far away from them
Really the infighting is just the worst. The idea that trams people assigned female have it easier is just the worst fucking meme there is. Death to queer sectarianism.
kinda a downer thing about abuse also SEX MENTIONED
so i broke up with my partner of about a year about a month ago
i learned that after cutting communication with them from a mutual friend that they had called me transmisogynist bc i was attributing them "standing up for themselves" as a threat because of me thinking of them as a dangerous cis man. obviously i did not think this, and the "standing up" for themselves was them yelling and insulting me, usually over perceived slights that were not what i was trying to communicate.
while we were dating they had also made a lot of transphobic comments towards me and other AFAB trans people. like saying AFAB trans people have it infinitely easier than AMAB trans people and that there was little point to me topping cos i'd have to use a strap.
so yea i dont feel great about all that lmao
sorry for you
I know its sad now, and I completely understand being sad, but I am glad you're out of a relationship with someone like that
thanks
One of the things I hate most about lefty spaces is the weaponization of social justice language. Sorry you had to deal with that first hand from a cynical abuser.
I also hate divisions in the queer community. AFAB and AMAB are part of the same struggle. Even if I accepted that it's easier for AFAB to transition, my thought would be "GOOD. I'm happy for you." Any queer movement would be incomplete without you.
sex
Using a strap is fucking based. Wtf is wrong with this person? Both cis women and trans women (and many other genders) enjoy using straps. Why would that disqualify anyone from topping?
You did the right thing getting far away from them
sex
their logic was that it wasn't enough stimulus to feel good and therefore be worth it? idk, really fucking weird take
thanks for the affirmation, it's really helpful for other people to remind me that they were fucking abusive and i needed to get out lol
Hope you find someone on your level when you're ready
Really the infighting is just the worst. The idea that trams people assigned female have it easier is just the worst fucking meme there is. Death to queer sectarianism.
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