Asking for a friend
Legendary, archived forever on the secret underground FBI database that this entire site is constantly backed up to.
The late capitalist version of a cave painting
Start clapping and saying "Thank you President Xi!! Very wholesome!!" because I'm not a Yank.
"But first we need to talk about: The Goddamn News"
theme plays
Slide showing the bombed out remains of the US Capitol appears. The text at the bottom of the screen says "Posadas was right".
Justin: Fortunately me and Liam were in the bunker...
Liam: York, PA. Don't underestimate us folks, I built this shelter in 2003
Alice: Look, you both know I was the best prepared for this. I simply went down into the basement of my apartment, put on my Soviet lead suit, and waited out the bombing. It's not hard.
This isn't lead-lined, and it's a pit pricey, but as Soviet suits have come up I feel obligated to share: https://poshmark.com/listing/Vintage-1970s-Soviet-Union-Russian-smoking-jacket-6057b586d737fd5b48a162f7
You think America isn't going to just instantly vaporize everything if they get hit?
really disappointed they aren't naming your CFL team the Halifax Explosion
Oh god, we're getting a CFL team? Fuck yeah, let's waste public money on a fucking football stadium that we don't have.
If it helps we don't know if the magnetic field of the earth would interfere with ICBM targetting mechanisms so they could feasibly go anywhere
Stand outside.
I dont want to live in a post nuclear scenario, and if I can get incinerated instantly thats what I'm gonna try to do
It's chill no one would live nuclear bombs are really strong. We're talking total annihilation of everything that doesn't live in the deep ocean feeding off sulphur deposits. Some may point out that this is somewhat overkill
thank whoever pushed the button and look forward to a bright future where my country is no longer worried every day about the US invading and murdering millions of us.
1:panic for 5-20 minutes
2:try to call family
3: get no signal because the satellite network will be one of the first things hit
4:Go up on the roof to get a good view as I drink wine , play pokemon and wait to die instantly in the first strike
Fuck trying to survive the aftermath of a nuclear exchange. Between the fallout and the blown power grid it would get very grim for the survivors very quickly.
Yeah, total grid blackout would mean no power grid for at least another year. More with radiation and infrastructure damage.
Balkanized America real quick.
Cheyenne mountain unironically redirecting all grain shipments during the nuclear winter to "maintain continuity of government"
Fully understand the desire to not stick around for what comes after but I think its important to remember nearly all post-apocalyptic media is made for pure fantasy enjoyment. As long as a few people survive they will almost certainly band together, humans much prefer working together over the lone wolf bullshit you see youtube preppers going on about for shit hits the fan scenarios. As long as the radiation didn't do a number on you I think it would actually be a much better time to be alive than now tbh, back to small communities working together with common goals and work that actually has a direct material effect on your well-being and those around you..... man I wish I lived in a county where land wasn't insanely expensive and planning permission wasn't a bastard, I'd happily go and live like that now.
I do agree to an extent but it would also give America's masses of domestic extremists free reign to rove around murdering people with impunity
I have a fallout shelter but it was built in the 1960's and is full of beer making equipment atm.
That means you'll end up as one of the side-bosses from Mad Max where you run a town that's built around the production of a particular item, and you're going to be the Beer Lord.
