This isn't even the best part. He pretends to "interview" Xi and he makes him sound like every Reddit nerd's manifestation of the eeeevil SEE-SEE-PEE
What about the Shah? Some monarchist bullshit about how they bring stability or some shit I presume.
"Mr Johnson what's your opinion on funding femboy death squads in Venezuela?"
"ouh, agh, ouch, all this fire hurts"
I like to think President Johnson is in that boring train-station zone from The Good Place, continuously jerking off to bad porn and jonesing for cocaine, because he kinda split the difference between war-mongering monster and Last President To Give A Shit About Poverty.
Imagining Tom, one bourbon in with a second in hand, meandering around Disney's Hall of Presidents, asking increasingly lewd questions of the figures, and ventriloquising their responses.
http://exiledonline.com/thomas-friedman-the-empires-useful-idiot-an-exile-classic/
Chinese McDonalds forming a giant energy shield that goes up into space, protecting the country from NATO aggression
This dipshit earns 300k per year and has won three Pulitzers for writing this absolute drivel.
Imma quote Matt on this one:
“So funny it transcended laughter, and I just had to sit back and say “That…is the funniest thing I’ve ever seen”
The part on Xi makes me want to shoot him and then myself. It manages to be wrong and racist and desperate cope all at the same time.
Is there anyone who has been so consistently incorrect as this asshole and been praised for it?
Elon Musk and Bill Gate have at least managed to get out of the way of their engineers enough to get a material object of some kind shipped.
TF has done nothing but bloviate third rate rehashes of "The End of History" with a 90s techbro gloss.
Wow I just read Friedman's exclusive new interview with Xi, check it out!
Friedman: Mr. Xi, you are an evil bad guy whose Authoritarianism knows no bounds. The Democracies of the World call upon you to renounce your Communist Ways and embrace our Globalised Rules-Based Order.
Xi: Mr Friedman, you are so smart and brave. Your words are no match for mine in the Marketplace of Ideas. I am henceforth owned and hereby declare Communism over. Today shall forever be known as Integrated Market Solutions Day.
you know I think I'm weird but at least I don't make up fake conservations with dead people and post on a news website like my neoliberal fantasies mattered at all to anyone ever
Man, he's not even doing the whole "pretend to interview someone famous and get them to reinforce my own worldview right", because Xi is alive and active.
One of the things that I think is really remarkable about Thomas Friedman is the way you are compelled to, as if by biological imperative, say the words “there’s my big boy. My big wet boy,” aloud any time you see him, or read something he has written, or even simply think of him.
The French call an orgasm “the little death.” No one knows why, it’s never been looked into. Interestingly, they use the same word to refer to our collective compulsion to say “there’s my big boy. My big wet boy,” any time Thomas Friedman occurs. As if, when uttering those words, your puny mind can, for but a moment, comprehend vast eternity. And that’s what I love about Thomas Friedman.
