here's the thing: everyone complains about late capitalism and how alienated and isolated we all are. everyone acknowledges this, and reassures each other of this, alone.
you need to get out of yourself, and your head, and your small bubble of one, and you need to go see old friends, or former friends, or people in your social circle who are just meh, or your annoying roommates, or your co-workers, or your former co-workers, or your lame family members, or your lame and bigoted family members, or strangers at a bar, or whomever, and party. meeting people is praxis, strengthening relationships is praxis, making yourself seen and vulnerable to another is praxis. please, guys, go out.
this, here, now, is a facsimile, mediated through a thousand screens. go kiss, go get kissed, go reject a kiss, go be denied a kiss. go out.
hexbear commenters and reading innocuous, well-intentioned posts as personal attacks in the most uncharitable way possible to air your grievances. name a better duo
250 comments, what a very hexbear way to bring in the new year lol
at best this is the usual ableist platitudes we're all sick of
at worst OP is going in somebody's note
genuinely suprised at the reaction to this post
obviously capitalist alienation isn’t our faults individually and is a societal problem and we shouldn’t be irresponsible about covid but you all are proving their point in a way jesus christ
exactly, you worded that well. i don’t feel like op had any ill intentions or posted this in bad faith though so to see everyone say “fuck you” to them seems very gross and mean.
comin' in hot on the heels of the struggle session about whether or not ass cleaning is good
Wait, was that an actual struggle session? I saw that post early and i chuckled because i thought it was funny...
Is washing ass a controversial opinion?!
nah it devolved into a struggle session about bidets vs. toilet paper and which was bourgeois decadence. the user who thought a $15 bidet was middle class extravagance went off the rails and started insulting everyone until they were banned
Do you remember the Zara box spring mattress struggle session? Lmao
you’re misreading what i’m saying or i just worded it poorly. someone not being outgoing isn’t “disgusting”, i’m not even very outgoing myself and don’t absolutely love being social, i tend to stick to myself a good chunk of the time. what’s disgusting is the REACTION to this post since it wasn’t made in bad faith and was obviously meant to be some nice encouragement to those op felt needed it, sorry for the mix up
i thought you were joking at first because of the emoji, how you worded things, you trying to imply i was a wrecker or something 😭 you do actually make a good point at the end there though, but i just cannot wrap my head around this being a hostile post at all
hexbear shut ins are beyond criticism, they are light itself
you constantly get caught up in your invented narrative of 10 layers deep of internet poison
you are vastly more hostile than anyone else in here, and every comment you make drips with condescension and like 6 layers of intention mind reading and assumptions
do you ever stop and re-read your comments to see how you would sound to an outside person? you're always airing some ancient grievance of yours that you've built up over the months of obsessive posting, and you're always passive aggressively trying to dunk on people you argued with and one up them months later - resulting in these complex gordian knots of comments where the only thing outsiders can parse is the condescending tone and emojis, and the implications within implications that you are following are entirely lost to everyone else
Nobody ever has any idea what you are even talking about you are so far gone in mind reading assumptions and logical leaps
That’s an incredibly generous reading of both the OP and the prior replies leading up to here.
It's a pretty normal reading actually, it baffles me how anybody could be so upset at a post like that tbh.
If your first reaction to somebody being happy and telling other people to be happy and socialize is "um ackschly sweaty..." you should probably do some introspection.
Apparently to you that interpretation is invalid.
It's not invalid, it is unhealthy though.
If they didn't like the post they could have just, you know, scrolled past it and not interact with it. OP wasn't calling out anybody in particular, it's entirely yours and their choice to take the post so seriously.
this post is making a lot of things about the users of this site make sense
I mean, as an immunocompromised individual, I just spent the third year of my life not being able to do anything so this post kinda sucks shit for me
yeah it doesn't really work for everyone
p sure if i hit up my "lame and bigoted family members" to be "seen and vulnerable" they'd throw a rope around my neck
jokes on you i was like this pre-covid because it costs too much money to socialize
I visit the friends, I touch the grass, I have the social life. Not starting the year sick.
there's no controlling how others are about covid. as a society we are being irresponsible about covid and going out and socializing is accepting that you will almost certainly get it at some point in your life, most likely multiple times. whether or not that is personally devastating enough to you to keep you inside is obviously gonna be individual
There is no way to visit random folks at parties and be safe about covid during a spike. It's just not possible.
no i am going to hide inside my room all day listening to podcasts and playing video games i don't like and then acting shocked when i hate myself
This site went from struggling about cats being outside to struggling about oneself being outside
The guineafowl do get pretty scared when I run next to them so...
Do that but also, you know, be careful wrt the ongoing mass disabling global pandemic
thats what the internet is for
shit not being in person doesn't necessarily mean it's not REAL
Online interaction will never replace IRL interactions in my opinion, at least not for me. You lose out on a lot of intimacy when communicating online, even if it's a video call.
seriously. It's like trying to replace your nutritious meals with pixie stix.
okay I guess immunocompromised individuals are stuck with pixie stix for the rest of their lives alone, thanks
:yes-chad:
life is bad enough without losing the ability to smell or breathe
hey, could you stop doing this? this really sucks. there's immunocompromised comrades on this site and people like you have made this entire pandemic hell for us.
i'm certain they don't care in the slightest, else they wouldn't keep doing it
Just. Fucking. LOL.
Instead of: "Hey guys NYE was really fun for me, I had a great time in the city with my coworkers and friends, even kissed a few people I liked."
Its: "BY MY DECREE, CAPITALIST ALIENATION IS A PERSONAL PROBLEM, ITS ALL IN YOUR HEAD BRO JUST GO OUTSIDE."
Skys the limit for the levels of ridiculous condescension disguised as advice from normie radlibs. Literally like extrapolating: "mentally ill ppl should just think more positively" from a time you were sad and then the weather changed and you became happy. Like good for you bro but fuck off with the sermon.
This persons condescension is ironically a symptom of capitalist alienation, a combination of being so far removed from the real situations and lives of others that you think your ineffectual platitudes are the word of god and not knowing how to sincerely relate to others about having a good experience other than talking at/down to them.
you’re definitely right but i don’t think it’s fair to expect patience and all of that out of a simple 3 paragraph post, that comes with forming a personal connection with someone and communicating with them over a long period of time. i also don’t really see how the op is tough love or aggressive or anything like that either, they aren’t looking down on other users for not going out or saying anything bad about them
i don’t think it’s fair to expect patience and all of that out of a simple 3 paragraph post,
patience is part of a process, this post on its own is just shit.
How dare you tell me to go out and have FUN?! ARE YOU IMPLYING I AM NOT HAVING FUN?!?!?!?!
Encouraging people to go out and take risks and be emotionally vulnerable (which is indeed necessary for personal growth because we are social creatures) is a lot easier when the person feels like someone is there to catch them if they metaphorically fall. For that reason, the encouragement works best when it’s personal and personalized, or at the very least patient and understanding if it’s from someone the person doesn’t know too closely.
:chefs-kiss:
if you want to be happy in your lifetime the solution has to personal.
"we all eat from the trashcan" :zizek-ok:
Sorry it only works if you're lucky. At the end of the day thats not even true because the solution depends on forming meaningful bonds with other people so it cannot categorically be a personal solution* JFL.
Not a single word beyond that either lmao
jk you have the same problem as OP, literally good for you that you are feeling better now but fuck off with the condescension. It isn't that the advice isn't valid, its simply that OP's post isn't advice in the first place.
OP is just an antisocial normie who happened to have a good night out on New Years with his buddy boyos. However, unlike the vast majority of other people who experienced the same, OP decided to make a condescending bragpost about it on the internet because they don't know any other way to share and process their joy other than to use it to talk down to people. Its fucking sad and reeks of soylent.
i’m sorry but you’re being a million times more condescending, rude, and bitter than op and the person you’re responding to. them saying “hey this advice worked for me” is not them being condescending to you jesus fucking christ
and nowhere in this post was op bragging or talking down, it was obviously encouragement to be more social more than anything. i didn’t have any plans this nye but when i read this i didn’t throw a fit i thought “yeah they’re not wrong there’s some old friends i could probably send a text too” and “i definitely need stay off social media more”and assuming that they went out and partied and calling them “an antisocial normie” just reeks of projection and just being terminally online. i mean this in the most respectful way possible: please log off for a bit and go text some old friends or family or do something not on your phone/computer for an extended period of time.
i’m not pissed at you just thought your comment was embarrassing and a bit over the top, and i do have a good group of friends the fuck are you talking about 😭 these assumptions you’re making about me are just bat shit insane you don’t know me lil bro, that whole thing genuinely might be the most insufferable and incomprehensible thing i’ve ever read, all over someone telling you to “get out” LMFAOOO
also don’t know why you’re telling me to pick up a dictionary i just literally quoted back what you said to them since you called them antisocial and you keep talking about my comprehension skills when i never said op said the word advice, the guy you were replying to said the word advice jesus christ 😭😭 yes “you need to go out” grammatically speaking is a command but cmon it just isn’t that big of a deal, and the title isn’t “i had a fun time this nye” because the post isn’t about them or a bragpost, it’s telling OTHER people to get out.
and i can’t believe you’re saying op is bragging when you literally just fucking bragged about what you did for nye and tried to rub it in my face when i said i didn’t do anything and managed to word it in the nerdiest way possible, which is just extremely pathetic you hypocritical dork. it’s not “telling” that i didn’t do anything. i fucking work, something clearly you don’t do since you spend all day crying online. the only one punching down here is you
i don’t need advice off the internet, just thought op’s post was sweet and obviously not in bad faith and thought everyone getting mad at it (aside from people talking about not having time to or covid that’s valid) was being ridiculous. anyways just got off the phone with an old friend hope you do the same since you seem wayyyy too angry, log out and have a happy new years 👍
at the end of the day, I did and you didn't, I never get mad at "muh interwebz" lmao only a select few individuals who use it
LMAO yup
everyone in here is basically being like “well if a problem is societal then there’s nothing on a personal level we can do about it!”
by their logic, hunger is societal issue made worse by capitalism, guess there’s no point in me, an individual, feeding hungry.
the reaction to this post has made me realize how many users here are just flat out terminally online and out of touch with the real world and it’s kind of disgusting to see after frequenting this community since the r/cth days it’s genuinely upsetting to me
I pray you get to enjoy more erotic asphyxiation and don't get eaten by a bird :rat-salute:
Nobody here is a normie, JFL at you for thinking you are and still posting here. Youre literally just a cuckservative larping as a leftist normie.
everyone in here is basically being like “well if a problem is societal then there’s nothing on a personal level we can do about it!”
by their logic, hunger is societal issue made worse by capitalism, guess there’s no point in me, an individual, feeding hungry.
none of what you wrote here is true or makes any fucking sense. The ironic thing is that I have half a mind to log off from this website and never come back again at this point because the chance of meeting asinine neoliberalized fucks like yourself in social contexts outside are orders of magnitude lesser than on the internet, even on sites like this.
Holy Fujitsu too:
many users here are just flat out terminally online and out of touch with the real world
(I have been) frequenting this community since the r/cth days it’s genuinely upsetting to me
i had a serious thing typed up in response but after re-reading i feel like you’re joking with me i can’t tell LMAO
what? i don’t think those people are disgusting at all and feel for them. what’s disgusting is the hostility in the comments from a community i thought was a lot more friendly than this
what’s disgusting is the hostility in the comments from a community i thought was a lot more friendly than this
Lmao, this is possibly the least friendly community I’ve ever encountered
well damn that’s unfortunate to hear :/ 90% of my interactions here and at r/cth were just lurking so i never really was that invested but discovering r/cth back in 2018/2019 was how i got into marxism and all that so that just sucks
“several day slumber” bro i just get on this website for 5-10 minutes like 1-2 days a week and engage here on a normal, casual level 😭 just because i don’t post here constantly doesn’t make me an alt jesus
instant upvoting is crazy, respectfully i think you should log off. you’ve made some good points and i even responded to something else you said in the thread outside of this about something else and agreed with it, but i think a lot of this argument is just simple miscommunication (like you thinking i was calling those people disgusting for being asocial when i wasn’t) but the whole alt, instant upvoting, wrecker, concern trolling shit is just baffling and something an extremely online person’s head would go to which is why i thought you were joking at first
responses like this make me feel like you’re doing a bit but it’s driving me crazy because you’re actually making other genuine, well thought out points in other comments
and just in case this is fr, no i’m not accusing you of mental illness and no mentally ill people aren’t bad tf? saying a concept (instant upvoting) is crazy doesn’t mean i’m calling you that or saying “crazy” people are bad
I do not think when people use the word crazy they are actually implying mental illness.
i wasn’t using it in a hostile way or actually calling you crazy (i was saying instant upvoting was crazy), i’m sorry if you took it that way
i’m playing the victim for apologizing since you took something i said the wrong way? i’m not a fucking victim i was just trying to be nice to you since you seemed hurt by it and make it clear i wasn’t calling you crazy LMAO
my cover as an undercover chud fbi agent wrecker set on concern trolling people who are mad at someone saying to go outside is blown now though, all thanks to your remarkable detective work. everyone here at the agency is hoping to get you on the db cooper case
i’m just matching your hostility since 1. it’s funny 2. i was engaging you in a nice manner and conceding when i thought you made a good point
also you know you can just stop responding right? 😭 if i keep responding you can just ignore it
upvoting because this actually made me laugh irl 😭
enjoy the new year (genuinely this isn’t sarcasm)
another "alt" here to tell you that your posts have been 100x more abrasive, hostile, and bad-faith than anyone else's in this thread
no i will stew resentfully in my room alone until world communism is achieved and covid is eradicated!
Staying inside 24/7 alone is not coping it’s social isolation and self torture. Chances are communism is not going to be achieved in our lifetimes, or at least not for decades. You need to live your life in the meantime and take care of your social and physical needs
literally everyone on earth needs to go outside and have friends, it's advice for everyone
Tangentially related but I just moved out of a slum apartment block in a really bad part of town to a decent ‘nice’ ‘luxury’ apartment complex in a wealthier area and i wasn’t prepared for how socially alienating it is being in the nicer place. I miss my old neighbors terribly, and didn’t realize how much I was actually interacting with them each day. Every time I passed by my next door neighbor outside smoking I would bum a cig and we would chat. And he never minded because he was an older man who loved to tell stories. Me and another neighbor always did our laundry at the same time so we would bring beers in the laundry room and bullshit around. Sometimes when I would use the grill another neighbor would come up and we’d talk about food or whatever. Even though I lived alone, I never really was alone.
Now I’m in a nice place where the forced socialization isn’t really there by design. The most interaction I’ve had with my next door neighbor is meeting them on the elevator, and it was just a friendly introduction and that was really it. No one wants to talk, everyone has their headphones in. It’s incredibly lonely.
Solution I have found: be thar fucking weirdo that just goes up to people and goes in for a full conversation like an Elder Scrolls player character. Shit just like, works. I chatted up a sweet old lady about this mutual neighborhoud cat we both pet and found out she was being illegally evicted in a way that i acrually dealt with before. She started by asking about apartments in the area and then explained her situation, I had been through the exact same scenario and it's all sorts of illegal to boot her out, it's being sold to another landlord and unless the buyer plans to say turn a flat back into a house and acrually occupy it, they cant remove tennants
100%. If you've ever heard people randomly just saying shit outloud to nobody/everybody on the bus, subway, or at a bar, it's not always because of a psychotic break/drunkness. Often times it's just somebody looking to start a conversation and they know eventually, somebody will respond to their loud monologue ramblings
And that person is me. I tricked myself into thinking i had bad social skills for a while but I am a fucking people at heart big time and after admitting it ive been described on more thsn one occasion as 'really fucking charming'. People are cool and fun for the most part, as far as figuring out who, if you smoke, other smokers but in general, old people are down hard to chit chat .
Also, I speak English and French but specialize in shitty translations of languages i dont speak:
me: “hey, whered you get those llamas?”
kid: “[kid’s name]”
me: “my llamas [strawberry].”
kid: …
me: …
I have a LOT going on that talking to people well was as easy as deciding to talk to people. Like, all my best qualities are for speech checks, ive always been and knew pretty really on that im fucking hilarious, very quick witted and am a massive langugage need and have a huge vocabulary. So yeah, for me it was a matter of getting over myself and finding out it's probably my greatest asset and that is also why i advocate it, but yeah, different people have diferent root causes.
This makes sense because I've formed friendships with who were just talking to me out of nowhere. Even if I was initially annoyed/nervous by them talking
People who make a lot of money are very open to socializing at more luxurious events/places
Rock climbing gyms, golf, and tennis for example are some places where people are very open
I've noticed what you said and I don't really get why people who make more money are less open to socializing in random places
More so the nicer complex is designed so you aren’t forced to socialize. Everyone has their own washer dryer, so you don’t have to leave your apartment to use the laundry room. Everyone has a balcony, so if you want to raise plants you do it on that instead of in a community garden, etc.
Maybe it’s just the culture of the new community I’m in but every time I try to strike up a conversation, it just goes nowhere quick. People only leave their apartment to pick up food courier orders or go to work.
This is good advice. It makes me sad how sad so many Hexbear members are. I wish it wasn't so :fedposting: to ask people here to come hang out my org has a bunch of cool people y'all would like
You can invite me to hang out. I'll flash you and smoke a joint in front of you to prove I'm not a :fedposting:
Reading this thread I am continuously reminded I don't know what the fuck is wrong with you people
lol it's winter and all the inside things cost money and will probably give me covid if i manage to dodge all the liberals drunk driving
this, here, now, is a facsimile, mediated through a thousand screens. go kiss, go get kissed, go reject a kiss, go be denied a kiss. go out.
new hope-pilled site greeting. just do it.
I got COVID on an airplane is that fucking out enough for you. I can't fucking stand posts like this, I'm alone in NYE because other people couldn't wear a fucking mask while coughing in public. I'm fucking done with 'out', and honestly I'm very happy being alone 99% of the time.
ya u right, outside is a death trap and u will die if u go outside as a queer person
