Sending good vibes to all of my trans comrades 
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more family stuff
Very frustrating how my mom seems to become mentally unwell by the fact that I’m no longer dressing and acting like she wants me to. She’s dealing with other stuff that makes her more stressed and on edge but I hate seeing me changing affecting her so much.
I know that I shouldn’t really think about that too much because it’s probably one of the reasons why I never explored my gender feelings further when I was a teen and I won’t let her words affect my transition process but it’s still hard to see and it makes me wonder how she’ll react when I come out as trans.
In the past it’s been a problem that she wants to know everything that’s going on in my life bit will react badly when I explain my mental or physical unwellbeing.
I’m emotionally still dependent on my parents because I don’t have a romantic interest and my friends have their own stuff they’re dealing with and don’t want me to visit them every day (they suck for that tbh). So it’s hard to limit my contact with parents.
Oof, you seriously need better friends. A friend of mine was going through some of the worst shit imaginable between her abusive ex and transitioning in a family that wasn't necessarily cool with it (although they did show up at least twice when it really counted, helping with moving that kind of thing). I couldn't imagine telling her "no, do not tell me about your problems, I'm dealing with my own problems" - part of how we grew together was by complaining about our partners that morphed into complaining about our exes lmao.
Your mom sounds like she kinda sucks too - that should be someone you should always be able to go with for a sympathetic ear and support, not someone you have to hide shit from because it might hurt her feelings. Sorry you're going through this especially since it seems like you have no one to gripe to irl. Hopefully you can find some kind of trans or lgbtq+ support group
My friends don’t tell me not to talk about my feelings but I find it difficult to open up (to anyone honestly) and just want to hang out with someone like almost every day (I hate texting). My friends just don’t have the mental energy to see me every day for no particular reason (they also live like 30 minutes away from me which doesn’t help).
Yeah my mom sucks in that way but her family sucks even more so she didn’t have a great example in growing up. Imo she just needs therapy but she probably has so much trauma that idk if she can still work through that at her age. I can literally see her dissociate if certain topics come up and she doesn’t notice it at all and acts like nothing happened.
Oh I see. My little sister has a similar thing, she was apprehended from my dad a while back (for good reason, my dad sucked) and she dealt with her trauma by basically never being alone. Uh, she still hasn't really changed and literally can't have a night alone without company so I guess she never really dealt with her trauma lol. Hope it's not the same story for you
Ah that sounds rough. I am working on my traumas and talking to a therapist about it so I don’t think that really applies to me. I just like to be around people but I do prefer to sleep alone (to the point of letting my exes sleep in my living room when staying over lol). Thank you though and I hope your sister gets better too at some point!