SALUTE
I have barely watched Breaking Bad
As a reminder, be sure to properly give content warnings and put sensitive subjects behind proper spoiler tags. It's for the mental health of not just your comrades, but yourself as well.
Here is a screenshot of where to find the spoiler button.
Let's have another good week everyone 
okay gang, we're gonna start fielding applications to post the mega for next week! we're gonna start making a list so we can book this a few weeks out so even if you don't get it this week your time to be The Megathreader will eventually come. go ahead and post below if you're interested
Not a fan of the "ironic" misogyny I'm still seeing on this website. We need a TC_69 purge for those losers.
I'm gay as fuck but there's this one male coworker I have who's really tall and masculine and they make me feel so small and feminine in comparison so he gives me a fluttery feeling.
Unfortunately I found out he's going through the steps to become a cop.
Just had an interaction at work where a guy initially thought I was a dude and then corrected himself by asking for my pronouns. I am at that wierd middle part of of transition where being correctly gendered is like a coin flip (weighted against my favor unfortunately)
He then apologized if I felt like I wasn't seen and that gendering people correctly is important to him.
Need more allies like him. Fuck, I'm crying a little now.
Life as a stealther
Just had a whole ass (relatively civil) argument with my coworker about trans politics (and trans kids specifically). Had to do a lot of educating and explaining, but I love and am experienced in live debate, so I was having fun and doing well, maybe changed his mind on a few things if I was lucky. At the end of our shift, I drop a final point and refer to trans people as "us" (including myself) and my coworker gets the reddest, most br*tish, face you've ever seen, hahaha. One of the most fun things about being stealth is that you can just carpet bomb the preconseved notions people have about you and about trans people at any time, and I always love to take that opportunity (when I feel safe to do so); I'm lucky enough to have that choice, so I feel an obligation to be visiblely trans when I can and represent us, you know?
I wish I had more to talk about these days. I guess when you hit 2 years into transition, the exciting stuff is ongoing or has already occurred. Not much to get super excited about except the slow, gradual transition that's not so fast like breasts or what have you. Skin's smooth. Breasts, heaving. Body hair, thinned. Voice, trained. Vagina, gotten. Fat, redistributed/ing. Idk, I feel out of place here nowadays. Kinda sucks. Guess I could talk about top surgery and how it's going to even out my breasts? Seems like a boring thing to drone on about.
EDIT: I just realized this post can be considered humble bragging. I swear to the gods I just wanted to make a post about how I can't really relate to a lot of you anymore :\
oh! before i forget, we're gonna be watching movies this saturday on our very own special trans cytube channel! this week's features are gonna be Fire Island and Hadestown. probably gonna get started around 8 PM EST
all transmega posters go to sleep together in the same comically wide bed like this btw
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Big news!! I won a scholarship today!!!! And I got my loan NoA and it's 2k higher than I expected!!!! I am now able to pay for my entire coming year of tuition and rent, and my jobs (which are already locked in barring one that is basically locked in) will be enough to cover food and then some!!!!!!!! I might even maybe be able to afford that big $500 order of indie chinese lolitas I've been wishlisting sometime before Christmas!!!!!!!!!!
rambling about trans/intersex solidarity, mentions of transphobia
something that frustrates me as being absent from the discourse around trans people, and kids in particular, is that their accusations, completely untrue in the case of trans kids, are true about another group of kids - intersex ones. and i very rarely hear anyone talking about this. there are kids being subjected to unconsensual surgeries and hormones, and we need to do something about that. the experiences of trans and intersex people with the medical establishment can seem opposite but they both come down to the same basic problem; that it is medicine trying to colonise gender and force our bodies to conform to their fucked up ideas of what they should be. we owe it to each other and to the children to fight together.
i'm eternally frustrated by how the rightwing, the fash, the terfs, wholesale lift the experiences of intersex children, use it as a weapon against the trans community, and then if they mention intersex kids at all - which they rarely do - it is simply to say that it's fine because it's correcting a mistake when it is done to us. and the best response the trans community seems to come up with is "no we don't do that actually". i think calling out their hypocrisy, forcing them to actually answer to what they've done in terms of misusing the suffering of intersex people, and being consistent with our own beliefs by including intersex liberation in our struggle in a meaningful way, would be a far better way to counter the narrative surrounding trans kids than what we're doing at the moment.
"Living in sin" makes it sound so much more lascivious and dirty than it is. Like sure Aunt Germaine, the wife and I were just hanging out cuddling and watching slop and eating cookies, but sure, we were fucking LIVING IN SIN!! OH, HOW DEBAUCHED, THE UTTER INDECENCY, A 24/7 LIFE OF LECHEROUS LESBIANISM!!!!!
Thesis: i want to post in the mega and talk to other trans folks
Antithesis: i have nothing to say
Synthesis: post meaninglessness
Was in the deep, deep south yesterday. The kinda place with like 5k population, no major cities for 2+ hours, no cell signals. Stopped at a gas station to refuel, piss, and get some snacks for the road. Standing in line waiting to pay, and this old woman starts slowly walking towards me. I didn't know what was about to happen but she gets really close to me and smiles and says, "I love your shirt. I do." and then smiles again and nods and I'm trying not to tear up, dawg. I paid for my stuff smiling and then drove away pretty happy.
I was wearing this shirt
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Idk man, shit is alright sometimes
(CW: Transphobia)
Just got a text from my father and I read it while I was still working and it kinda fucked me up, I was struggling a bit to do the last bit of tutoring for the day.
Context is I had said I could probably meet up for lunch Sunday if I'm not collapsed on my bed due to work. Since I have a 12 hour outdoor work day on Saturday and this week is also just long in general. And he knows that. Oh and during our call Sunday my mother yelled at me over his phone again and tried to gaslight me about how she had told me that she wants me homeless when I brought it up. So this is coming right after that. Fun.
"OK, Sunday, choose the place and stop whining, you know that there is still a place for you here and that your life would be easier if you were ready to wait a few more years for your transition."
Just. I know it's not the absolute worst thing I've gotten from either of them about it. But it just hurts so much more deeply for some reason. I want to just get into bed and curl up to cry but I need to shower and eat first since I only just got off work so I'm gonna have to zombie through that for an hour or some such before I can let this emotionally settle and that sounds fucking awful right now.
Oh and he has literally never once called me by my name. He compromised by saying he would switch to my old nickname which I was fine with, only to then immediately stop using it and go back to my deadname.
