Final Fantasy XI

Final Fantasy XI is the eleventh numbered installment in the… Okay, you know what it is, I’m just going to tell you about one of the storylines!

During the Wings of the Goddess expansion, adventurers will be sent back in time to experience the events of the Crystal War, a cataclysmic event that is the foundation for conflicts of the modern-day timeline. Should an adventurer choose to serve the Kingdom of San d’Oria, they will be immersed in the story of the Young Griffons—a group of children who would see themselves knights, many of whom grow into prominent characters later in life.

Among the Young Griffons, the player will find Bistillot, a shy boy who doesn’t like to be seen. With his penchant for engineering, shy demeanor, and lack of combat potential, Bistillot prefers to spend his time inside of an orcish war machine that he was able to repair to working condition.

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He is often seen before he is heard, with his signature phrase, “HAAAALLOOOOOOOOO” being used to hail the adventurer. Through the course of the story, Bistillot finds his way, even contributing to the war effort with his engineering skills.

However, when another member of the Young Griffons is kidnapped and taken to the present day, the adventurer must return to the present day and reunite with the Young Griffons’ present selves! The adventurer’s first contact in the present day is Bistillot. When the adventurer hears the signature “HAAAALLOOOOOOO,” Bistillot approaches the player, but what the player sees is… a woman?? She introduces herself as Bostilette, a “friend of Bistillot.”

After the rescue mission, Bostilette comes clean. She is, of course, the very same Bistillot who was a little boy twenty years earlier. She explains that she was very sick as a baby, so her parents gave her a boy’s name so that she would be stronger and survive the illness. Once she overcame the illness, she was comfortable to reclaim her name and gender. Well, that closes the book on that story, except… I’ve decided that’s bullshit!

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I have unilaterally decided that Bostilette is trans, the sickness she had was dysphoria, she stayed in the orcish war machine because she was an egg, and I hope you all agree!

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As a reminder, be sure to properly give content warnings and put sensitive subjects behind proper spoiler tags. It's for the mental health of not just your comrades, but yourself as well. Here is a screenshot of where to find the spoiler button.

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  • rtstragedy [fae/faer, she/her]
    ·
    1 month ago
    types of attraction

    I know the feeling - trying to re-excavate all of my former interactions and try to think about "what was I really feeling here?" Aesthetic/gender envy was huge for me pre-transition, as well. I have always desired a closeness from my friends and I have always wanted just one or two people as Close Friends, and so that re-frames things too, lol...

    And yes, I have a list of bad words in my head now that if I'm using them on myself or others are using them on me, I know something is being misunderstood, "being weird about other people" is a big one, but only you know recently. Last week I would have used that kind of term on myself, though...

    I am still struggling to categorize whether or not I've felt romantic feelings like ... ever, honestly? What if what I've called romance is just the same desire for closeness I get from friends + sexual attraction??

    Anyway, what I'm trying to say is I know what you mean, godo luck!

    ND

    I mimic in two ways.

    1. I pick up silly catchphrases and jokes from everywhere, I'm like a silly tape recorder. Partner says I do the echolalia all the time lol I barely even register it. He does it too now, in solidarity. He's great meow-melt I do this for fun, I don't consider it a form of masking, and it's a way of showing affection too (same as repeating things that are important to me over and over, or saying A LOT OF WORDS, etc.)
    2. Mimicry as a form of masking, like you suggested - this is a big thing for me historically. It's like I'm made of water, just kinda flowing along with whatever.

    Even if that causes strife, I feel like I need to be willing to tell people how I feel, what I'm feeling, because for so long I simply didn't feel, and it made it way to easy to fall into this habit.

    YES I completely agree.

    I am glad you got something out of it!

    bonus thoughts before I run out of time

    So I've been thinking about attention and feeling close to people. I think we can think that it's really about the amount of time we spend with someone that makes us feel close, but I don't think that's really the core bit for us.

    I think that the highest quality interactions (of any kind, with any number of people):

    1. Are unmasked
    2. Are undivided (ie. it's taking place with minimal distractions, at least most of the time)
    3. Take place in a safe environment
    4. Exist within a relationship that feels secure

    I still like spending lots of time with people, but this helps reconcile the contradictions I sometimes have had in the past where I would feel like it was never enough - people would always assume that meant I needed more time from them, but really I was missing one of the things above (#2 is a weak thing, lol I spent time with a friend this week and we talked about a whole bunch of different things at once, she was finishing up homework, her kitten was running around being adorable, but it was still an extremely good few hours because we both genuinely were focused on each other most of the time)