MORE PRIDE THAN EVER BEFOOOOOOORE lets-fucking-go

  • BountifulEggnog [she/her]
    ·
    5 months ago
    talking about dysphoria?

    Dysphoria has definitely become like a background noise kind of thing lately. Constant, but low intensity. It feels a little wierd to say it but this is so much better then the random spikes between "I'm completely fine" and "holy shit I'm dying".

    Has this happened to any of you? is this a sign I'm cis

      • BountifulEggnog [she/her]
        ·
        5 months ago

        Probably, how could a person not be envious of people with a different gender then the one they were assigned?

        • ashinadash [she/her]
          ·
          5 months ago

          Clearly, all cis people must feel this way! This could never denote that I would be anything other than cis! i-love-not-thinking

          In seriousness I'm glad to hear the dysphoria isn't crushing you atm meow-hug it comes and goes in waves or at different levels sometimes, plus stuff like how dissociated you are can impact it too.

    • kristina [she/her]M
      ·
      edit-2
      5 months ago

      Are you on meds / doing something to transition? Honestly it's very common for it to fluctuate. But it's more important to hedge against the worst dysphoria outbreaks before they happen, they can make you suicidal and it's a big risk

      Sometimes after 10+ years hrt even I have deeply unserious ideas entering my head like "wow maybe I'm cis" after having a good day. I obviously know I'm only feeling that way because of my meds

      • BountifulEggnog [she/her]
        ·
        5 months ago

        No, I'm not. Probably won't be able to for a while even if I wanted to start. And uh, by lately I mean the past like 4 days.

        And yes, I really need to figure that out. I am already quite prone to that kind of thinking, and already some of my episodes have been quite bad.

          • BountifulEggnog [she/her]
            ·
            edit-2
            5 months ago

            I'm still not 100% sure if I want to right now. I still feel quite new to all this and am processing a lot of feelings around it. Plus I still live at home and I'm not sure if they'd be accepting of me doing transitioning (for a lot of reasons, there's a lot of factors unfortunately). We'll see I guess.

            Aw thank you :meow-hug: not really though. I need to fix my issues and be a productive member of society (or at least a capitalists idea of productive). I always really appreciate the community here, replies always mean a lot to me :meow-hug: thanks again. I feel really accepted right now.

    • imogen_underscore [it/its, she/her]
      ·
      5 months ago

      this was my experience early on. spiky intense waves for a while, then after transitioning for a while it very much became relegated to background noise. still have bad days, but those intense all-consuming bouts are wayyyyyy less frequent.

    • Thallo [love/loves]
      ·
      5 months ago

      Could be a lot of things. I feel similarly lately. I don't really hate looking at myself in the mirror anymore, but I kind of just know that I need to change things. The will is still there but with less pain.

      Maybe coming out to your therapist was a level of acceptance that you reached, and now your dysphoria has cooled off because you're taking steps.

      I've felt this way since coming out, anyway.

      or you're just a TOTALLY normal cis person having a VERY typical cis experience

      • BountifulEggnog [she/her]
        ·
        5 months ago

        Yea, the timing is quite coincidental, and I have been thinking "holy shit am I really doing this?".

        blob-no-thoughts but yes maybe I am a totally normal cis person having a very typical cis moment.