https://www.reddit.com/r/energydrinks/comments/18dd1tm/does_making_energy_drinks_into_popsicles_lower/

pooh-wtf

  • CDommunist [they/them, comrade/them]
    ·
    11 months ago

    Hexbear deserves being dunked on for not making posts like this

    It's better than everybody talking about climate change making them want to die

    • GinAndJuche
      ·
      11 months ago

      I’m pretty sure the mods would do something if we all started posting about shoving potentially unsafe objects in our asses.

      I’m not sure if that’s good or bad.

      • Tachanka [comrade/them]
        ·
        11 months ago

        America's most under-memed president wonder-who-thats-for GARFIELD wonder-who-thats-for died from boofing related medical malpractice

        • GinAndJuche
          ·
          11 months ago

          The surgeon also ate lunch while operating on him. Who can say which was a larger factor.

          • GrouchyGrouse [he/him]
            ·
            11 months ago

            If it was lasagna I'd say it's a 70/30 split in favor of the lasagna fingers.

      • glans [it/its]
        ·
        11 months ago

        the safety/danger of inserting an object into one's asshole depends sooooooooo very much on the recipient.

        how do the mods have the required information?

        • GinAndJuche
          ·
          11 months ago

          Hmm, was anal circumference form not mandatory when you signed up or was that just me being singled out?

          • glans [it/its]
            ·
            11 months ago

            iirc was given a choice between depth or width to prove "i am human". tbh idk recall which i provided or if it was even the real answer. but they change over time. do the mods keep a spreadsheet or what?

            • GinAndJuche
              ·
              11 months ago

              Real talk tho, what are the actual dangers you initially referred to? I’m seriously considering doing this a joke because it would be very funny to boot the death lemonade.

                • GinAndJuche
                  ·
                  11 months ago

                  Does humor require an audience? Sometimes funny things are simply for their own sake. For example, I snorted a line ghost pepper once because it was a funny thing to do. Whether or not the people around me found it humorous wasn't the point.

                  • glans [it/its]
                    ·
                    11 months ago

                    sounds like you are saying the joke is for yourself. that's a fine answer why be so defensive. i do jokes for myself all the time.

                    The point of the original comment is that there is no such thing as "unsafe" in an objective way. Unless it's like a meat cleaver or something.

                    So to discuss this joke. keeping it humorous.

                    • absorption of caffeine and other misc ingredients thru the rectum --- i have little insight here. i do know that some substances which are normally ok consumed orally are adsorbed differently (unpredictably, dangerously or not at all) this way because they don't get filtered by liver and other organs. you will have to find out about it.

                    • carrier fluids - you should try just plain jane lemonaid first as a prototype. sounds like something that would tend to irritate. start in the bathroom. or the backyard.

                    • method of insertion - this can be done in smart or stupid ways

                    Various other logistics.... i feel that you are a total novice who will likely have an uncomfortable experience.

                    Don't do this if you have roommates; it will annoy everyone.

                    if you wish to have fluid in your rectum just start with a small amount of water. the rest is just chaos.

                    • GinAndJuche
                      ·
                      11 months ago

                      I think I may phrased that poorly, the tone was not meant to be defensive. More of a, “yeah dude I enjoy doing dumb shit” dudebro style tone.

                      Moving past that, that’s a very informative response. As a dumb person who does dumb shit, you opened my eyes to a couple safety factors I did consider.

                      The trip report is going to be hilarious.

        • zed_proclaimer [he/him]
          ·
          11 months ago

          They have bull testicles in them, at least that’s what my 6th grade buddy told me and I never researched and just believed

        • Leon_Grotsky [comrade/them]
          ·
          11 months ago

          Serious answer is it depends. AFAIK there isn't really anything in the drinks themselves that's a problem, most of the crap in it is plant-derived; more-so the animal testing.

        • The_Grinch [he/him]
          ·
          11 months ago

          Google says taurine is no longer extracted from animal sources. It didn't come from testicles it used to come from bile.

          • voight [he/him, any]
            ·
            11 months ago

            why is it even extracted? don't people just get amino acids from proteins? is it a chemical feedstock for making stuff?

            i know it as a sulfur containing word slapped on energy drinks that makes people stinky

      • glans [it/its]
        ·
        11 months ago

        it is so funny you say that. because for some reason I imagined this vegan person I haven't seen in 10+ years as the guy in the story.

        • The_Grinch [he/him]
          ·
          11 months ago

          At least 80% of MDs did meth in med school. This is a fact, and proves that meth is perfectly healthy.

  • Mindfury [he/him]
    ·
    11 months ago

    this is the best reddit post in years, i cannot believe this has been classified as dunk tank material

    • glans [it/its]
      ·
      11 months ago

      I am also confused. how does it meet any criteria?

  • aaaaaaadjsf [he/him, comrade/them]
    ·
    edit-2
    11 months ago

    Opening a caffeine capsule and putting the powder that was inside it on and underneath their tongue would've accomplished the exact same thing...

    They just wanted to stick something up their arse. More power to them.

  • P1d40n3 [he/him]
    ·
    11 months ago

    This is posting excellence. Posting perfection. These are the posts that inspire us all.

    Do better, Hexbear.

    • glans [it/its]
      ·
      11 months ago

      but also how did he manage to do that

  • dannoffs [he/him]
    ·
    11 months ago

    Show

    I don't know how to to the 1984 calendar emoji

  • AntiOutsideAktion [he/him]
    ·
    11 months ago

    Shoving an iced coffee up my butt and having an anime power-up transformation to become a commercial real estate broker.

    • Apolonio
      ·
      edit-2
      11 months ago

      deleted by creator