from an anti-poly BookFace group that claims to be ML :wtf-am-i-reading:
a lot of things have been ruined by captialism but this is such bad fucking analysis
I'm guessing this is what the "homosexuality is bourgeoisie decadence" weirdos moved on to after open homophobia stopped being socially acceptable
It's funny how like every trans person I know irl is reserved and borderline arromantic, myself included, and yet it's automatically assumed that all the trans people who are friends must be in a polycule.
Never mind how this person is complaining about "neoliberal" capitalism atomizing relationships only to conclude that the problem is essentially the disruption of the "nuclear family," which is itself a relatively anomalous and recent type of family organization.
It’s funny how like every trans person I know irl is reserved and borderline arromantic, myself included, and yet it’s automatically assumed that all the trans people who are friends must be in a polycule.
CW: Discussion of Transphobia
spoiler
I'd guess it's fetishisation of trans people due to pornography leading people to draw conclusions and further fetishise them, while also creating "trans people are dangerous" narratives.
It’s funny how like every trans person I know irl is reserved and borderline arromantic, myself included, and yet it’s automatically assumed that all the trans people who are friends must be in a polycule.
My experience is kind of the opposite. Most of the ones I know are some form of poly, to the point where I feel the odd one out :(
:wojak-nooo: "cultural degredation"
This is a popular idea with most "Patriotic Socialists", I wonder why?
And will claim being encouraged to volunteer with an org is ableism.
Its me, Im mfers. I dont like being called out like that :BibleThump:
I agree that modern polyamory, specifically within the working class, is in some ways a consequence of neoliberal capitalism colliding with sexual liberation.
As rents and cost of living increases, the need for more roommates to cover rent increases steadily, and why not choose roommates that want to fuck?
3-4 people living in the same apartment/house and sharing fewer beds while actually enjoying being around one another is a fantastic way to cope with the hell of late stage capitalism and the housing insecurity that comes with it.
This is actually how polyandry started in rural Tibet so there's historical president for labor units becoming sexual units that share the burden of cost of living/labor of social reproduction.
For real. It's irritating when genuine ideas like this are vulgarized for the sake of shaming sexual minorities.
Not treating people as your property is alienation actually
Its not entirely without basis, in the sense that a lot of poly indeed has a lot of neoliberal underpinnings related to individuals being individuals, individuals being replaceable, treating people as commodities, the transient nature of most modern relationships, and the lack of community, which some people try to replace with an inordinate amount of intimate relationships. With all that I don't mean that poly is bad, au contraire, poly can and does work, but it does require you to decolonize your mind.
It goes either way IMO
some people really just want to be selfish atomized sex addicts, and polyamory is technically compatible with that
other people just legitimately want to have more than one actual relationship, and polyamory is compatible with that.
The first kind is even more alienating than a "trad nuclear family", and the second kind is less alienating.
To be fair, trad nuclear family is something that I find particularly scary, but yeah.
Well I actually misspoke, I should have said "trad monogamous couple". Multigenerational family would still work
What do you find scary about nuclear families? Environmental impact/suburbia?
What do you find scary about nuclear families? Environmental impact/suburbia?
The neurosis of it. The whole repressed milquetoast suburbian non-existence it offers, the alienation ...
well, you made me revisit my reason for using that language. The reason I used it was that I've seen instances where a (usually hetero) couple goes poly, and one partner will essentially stop sexually desiring the other.
Whether this cessation of sexual desire was there to begin with and was the original motivation for the polyamory in the first place, or whether it developed naturally after going poly, is an open question. If the former, I think it qualifies as "selfish". If the latter, then it can't be helped and too bad
But yea I guess it was harsh and not super accurate language. But I really doubt that there are zero couples who fit that first type
again this isn't a criticism of polyamory as every other arrangement has its own problems too
It's a lazy, non-materialist take which is extra egregious when you have literal Marxist-Leninist revolutionaries like Kollontai out here doing in depth work on the nature of sex, love, and romantic relationships as superstructural outcomes of the material world. There's so much work to actually be done untangling and understanding these social dynamics from a Marxist perspective and this guy ain't it lol
no seriously like everything does, imagine thinking this specifically is relevant in any way except if you’re a straight-up theorist writing a book rn
IDK, when youre drunk at 2 am with your buddies and talking about all kinds of things a lot of stuff becomes relevant.
my ass has neoliberal underpinnings
I am really trying to come up with a joke about this that involves "destroyed by privatization" and the free market ...
How much free time do you need to have to form an anti-polyamory facebook group?
Well they've got all that free time from neither getting laid nor making the spreadsheets that make polyamory possible I guess
I love that there’s largely like two kinds of poly people: those with spreadsheets and those with california king sized beds lol. My partner can have plans every single day of the week meanwhile I’m such a hopeless romantic that I’m still not over this cute goth girl who would talk to me about anthropology and stuff months later
Probably enough to run a moderately sized polycule if he could get laid in the first place ...
The stick up this man's ass has a stick up its ass
And not in the fun way
Is "I'm afraid you'll leave me so we need to structure society for compulsory monogamy" a sexual preference?
i'm not some crusader for poly shit but lmao what a diseased take. like these people really think exclusive marital fidelity was the dominant pre-neoliberal romantic form? like we were just doing the nuclear family for all of human history? never mind that obviously the whole point is you can have a social responsibility to more than one person.
lmao yea the bad takes always come out whenever polyamory gets brought up around here, that’s why I try to never talk about it unless someone else does first. It’s like the only topic that will get me effortposting because everyone else has :brainworms: about it
I kinda have the same response. It's helped remind me that some portion of leftists are very judgmental people and only don't show it because our politics guards against that by default, in most cases. But you can see it itching to come out.
i don't necessarily think it's fair to jump to "they hate polyamory and are using intentionally harsh language to signal a desire for its destruction" when you could also just like, assume the person was speaking very casually
sometimes people jokingly refer to a thing in a semi-derogatory manner even when they approve of it or are a part of the in-group in question. for instance i'm trans but i regularly say stuff that i would find highly suspect in your average cis person, but probably not your average leftist (at least here).
I didn't mean it disparagingly, but I don't treat it as particularly sacred either. I think relationships under the umbrella of polyamory have been commonplace and no more or less stable and fulfilling than monogamous ones for most of human history, and only given a name and the connotations of personal identity relatively recently.
Calling it “poly shit” is kinda like calling all romance “love shit” or friends “friend shit”, I’d imagine.
tbf I do shit like this, but I get your point.
Bjork's comment read pretty positive over-all to me so I assumed it was just offhand, but :vivian-shrug:
There's a bunch of other shit takes in this thread, so I get being on the defense a little. Just giving you my two cents hah
it's all good. I just legit started laughing at you firing that off as an apology. It rocked.
Yep, zero responsibility or bonding with the people I play with. We aren't even friends.
Idiots on the internet > actual revolutionary Alexandra Kollontai, evidently
Terrible analysis but the hot take machine is an insatiable beast. With that said, I get being horny but can't really imagine wanting more than one partner lol :volcel-police: