• Bloobish [comrade/them]
      ·
      2 years ago

      "Please get me out of this hellscape, these capitalists are going to kill us all..."

  • TheModerateTankie [any]
    ·
    2 years ago

    They know this because American companies are spying on you with smart gadgets.

    • GoebbelsDeezNuts [any]
      ·
      2 years ago

      OpSec is just saying one thing to the devices in your kitchen, and another to the devices in your bedroom.

      Gotta keep them on their toes.

    • Deadend [he/him]
      ·
      2 years ago

      It’s actually the espresso machine that does foaming. The messages are in the foam.

  • AFineWayToDie [he/him]
    ·
    2 years ago

    "Reams" of data, according to "experts."

    I'm imagining a scientific paper which precisely quantifies the thresholds for "a lot," "a fuckload," "shit-tons," and found that the amount of data collected fell within the R-value for "reams" with 99.5% confidence.

  • Vampire [any]
    ·
    2 years ago

    Spying on me via some boiling water and a ceramic fiter

  • Wheaties [comrade/them]
    ·
    edit-2
    2 years ago

    How do they know? Well, if we're spying on our civilians, it's only natural they're spying on our civilians as well. The NSA has reams of data, therefore, it is logical to conclude Xi has reams of data, too. Probably reams of reams. :very-smart:

    • invalidusernamelol [he/him]
      ·
      2 years ago

      This is my favorite totally nonsense thing, like so what? What is China going to do about it? Are they going to put me in an American prison? Are they going to take my American home? Are they going to go through the American Boarder agencies to arrest me for crimes?

      Oh right, it's American power structures that can do that. Any data china collects can at worst be used to serve me Alibaba ads.

    • alcoholicorn [comrade/them, doe/deer]
      ·
      edit-2
      2 years ago

      Libs whose only form of self-expression is consumption destroying things they've already paid for will never not be funny, but getting off Keurig's shitty, overpriced, DRM coffee is always smart.

      • SaniFlush [any, any]
        ·
        2 years ago

        Keurig profited off of the proletariat’s desperation and provided coffee which took no time to brew. The ritual of coffee is now a vestigial button press.

        • alcoholicorn [comrade/them, doe/deer]
          ·
          2 years ago

          coffee which took no time to brew

          You still have to throw out the old coffee and add a new one. It's saving no work. It's a gadget right next to electric can openers, airfryers, and automatic wine corkers.

          • SaniFlush [any, any]
            ·
            2 years ago

            Just watch, in five years they’ll try to sell us Antigriddles to make our desserts colder

  • ekjp [any]
    ·
    edit-2
    1 year ago

    deleted by creator

  • Quimby [any, any]
    ·
    2 years ago

    It's comforting to imagine Xi knows he has my approval. I don't think it's true, but it's comforting to imagine.

    • solaranus
      ·
      edit-2
      11 months ago

      deleted by creator

  • hexaflexagonbear [he/him]
    ·
    2 years ago

    Most marketing firms have reams of data on every American. That's without access to data from smart devices.