• FnordPrefect [comrade/them, he/him]
        hexbear
        22
        25 days ago

        It would be great if beanis posting became the present day Louie Louie:

        The following month an outraged parent wrote to Attorney General Robert F. Kennedy alleging that the lyrics of "Louie Louie" were obscene, saying, "The lyrics are so filthy that I can-not [sic] enclose them in this letter." The Federal Bureau of Investigation investigated the complaint, and looked into the various rumors of "real lyrics" that were circulating among teenagers. In June 1965, the FBI laboratory obtained a copy of the Kingsmen recording and, after 31 months of investigation, concluded that it could not be interpreted and therefore the Bureau could not find that the recording was obscene.

      • InevitableSwing [none/use name]
        hexbear
        15
        edit-2
        25 days ago

        beanis

        "Hey, Mike - stop what you're doing for a sec."

        "No." He doesn't look at Bob. He keeps tying at a fast clip.

        "Just a sec. You've been working on the bear site non-stop since yesterday. I'm Bob Nobody and you're Mike Rando. You're not gonna get out of this cubicle and promoted faster if you work work yourself like a dog."

        "Work produces results."

        "C'mon. Just a sec."

        "Fine. You have a 30 seconds." Looks at watch. "Starting... now."

        "What does beanis really mean?"

        "It's in the 𝙷𝚎𝚡𝚋𝚎𝚊𝚛 𝙳𝚎𝚌𝚘𝚍𝚎𝚍 𝚃𝚎𝚛𝚖𝚒𝚗𝚘𝚕𝚘𝚐𝚢 𝙱-𝟻 file."

        "Just tell me."

        "No."

        "You've already done at least 5 files for just the Bs?"

        Sighing. "You haven't read a thing - have you. Not actually a question. Before you ask me any more questions - consult all the reference materials. I'm busy."

        "How many files have you written for the bear site? I mean in tot—"

        Angry. "Time is up." Looks away and starts typing at a fast clip again.

        "Not 30 seconds. Did you sleep in the office? Where? There's no place to lie down. Did you end up sleeping right there in chair?"

        He keeps typing but it's clear that he's even angrier. "A maximum of 30 is implied."

    • InevitableSwing [none/use name]
      hexbear
      22
      25 days ago

      die-motherfucker

      We love our jokes even if they seemingly seem tasteless. We sincerely hoped Mr. Kissinger lived to be 200. 𝚍𝚒𝚎-𝚖𝚘𝚝𝚑𝚎𝚛𝚏𝚞𝚌𝚔𝚎𝚛 was all in fun.

      • Teekeeus [comrade/them]
        hexbear
        10
        25 days ago

        We sincerely hoped Mr. Kissinger lived to be 200.

        I unironically wanted him to live so he could continue witnessing the decline and slow collapse of america

    • ashinadash [she/her, comrade/them]
      hexbear
      20
      25 days ago

      Feds watching this thread, reclining in their office chairs, laughing to themselves and making jokes about stacking rocks.

      • Evilsandwichman [none/use name]
        hexbear
        17
        25 days ago

        It'll never not be funny to me that there were eager people who joined the feds to stop domestic (muslim) terrorists who through the course of scouring folks' trash realized actually most people from this group or that are actually entirely ordinary, boring people, and the threats they were promised they would face up against were basically nonexistent, contrary to what most people are told.

        I'd post the article I read this from but it was ages ago.

      • HexBroke [any, comrade/them]
        hexbear
        11
        25 days ago

        Some of actually work for our salary and post as well

        It's a better gig than the catfishing unit

  • OutrageousHairdo [he/him]
    hexbear
    40
    25 days ago

    Probably never. It makes a lot more sense to keep the site running as is and skim a trickle of information off the top. People blow off steam here sometimes, say things they probably shouldn't say on the Internet, and that gets added to the case file as just another exhibit.

      • TheDoctor [they/them]
        hexbear
        34
        25 days ago

        I’m just waiting for someone to file a FOIA request on Hexbear and Chapo chat

      • OutrageousHairdo [he/him]
        hexbear
        23
        edit-2
        25 days ago

        I don't mean that they have one for like Hexbear itself or any particular person, more that they just use it to find people of interest (and to keep tabs on ones they've already picked up on). In that respect, it's not so different from other social media, but the density of people with """unacceptable""" political beliefs might make it a particularly alluring source. Dossier is probably the more accurate term, as case file implies some kind of pending action.

  • @SSJ2Marx
    hexbear
    34
    edit-2
    25 days ago

    In like a year when another US ally is committing yet another genocide we'll be targeted along with a thousand other leftish websites by the tiktok law.

  • supafuzz [comrade/them]
    hexbear
    33
    25 days ago

    I don't know the site has been running pretty good lately, are we sure it wasn't seized already?

  • GrouchyGrouse [he/him]
    hexbear
    18
    25 days ago

    This place is clearly 100% parody satire. We're all libs here. We say it all the time.