Should've told him that it's a good face mask tbh

  • DavidGarcia@feddit.nl
    ·
    9 days ago

    Imagine he reforms the country into a planned economy because he discovers the horrors of plastics

    haha wouldn't that be funny

    • -6-6-6-@lemmygrad.ml
      hexagon
      ·
      9 days ago

      The death of The King choking on plastic wrap truly is gonna be what kicks off the revolution.

    • CloutAtlas [he/him]
      ·
      edit-2
      9 days ago

      "Wait so not everyone owns a palace and swans and manors??! I thought the poors chose to be poor! That's what auntie Maggie told me! Why didn't their parents leave them an estate??! That's deeply irresponsible, did they spend their fortune trying to start a colony unsuccessfully like Scotland?"

      "You're telling me the woman that was hired to raise me because mummy and papa were too busy died poor? They told me she moved to a farm (and castle) in the midlands! This is an outrage"

      "Get me Lord Palmerston. Oh he's dead? Get me uncle Winston, I was told he did a fantastic job for the poors in India. Oh he's also dead? He killed how many people??! Get me auntie Maggie, she helped the poors in the north right?? Oh she's also dead? She did WHAT in Ireland? Is that why they hate us?? Oh good heavens, Diana was right, and my family convinced me she was an evil influence and we had her killed!"

      Imagining Charles being a good natured but completely miseducated moron is a pretty funny scenario

  • Utter_Karate [he/him, comrade/them]
    ·
    9 days ago

    He hasn't stopped shrieking since. And when the king shrieks, all of Britain hears it inside their brains. This will cripple their economy.

    • -6-6-6-@lemmygrad.ml
      hexagon
      ·
      edit-2
      9 days ago

      The only thing holding up their economy is Games Workshop so I think they'll just raise prices on their plastic toys and all will be well in britbongia. A totally serious country.

        • Enjoyer_of_Games [he/him]
          ·
          9 days ago

          Does an empire of fanatical xenophobic colonists ruled by a decrepit corpse on a throne and maintained entirely through the sheer inertia of centuries old ritual and calcified institutions sound like something the british could come up with?

    • CloutAtlas [he/him]
      ·
      9 days ago

      Plastic wrap? Oh now he won't stop shrieking till St Swithin's Day

  • cRazi_man@lemm.ee
    ·
    9 days ago

    Responding to something printed by The Mirror? The Onion does more reliable reporting than these guys. If people are looking for outrageous stories to comment on then the UK has plenty of publications that shouldn't even be used as toilet paper.

    • -6-6-6-@lemmygrad.ml
      hexagon
      ·
      9 days ago

      Honestly I read it like an onion article. Didn't take it seriously. Laughing at greasy monarchs is funny, regardless.

      • cRazi_man@lemm.ee
        ·
        9 days ago

        Feel free to enjoy. Just know you're reading a tabloid gossip rag. This story is likely entirely fictional.

        • -6-6-6-@lemmygrad.ml
          hexagon
          ·
          9 days ago

          Yup. Mirror, Sun; etc. It was a vehicle for a joke about the King wrapping it around his face

    • 7bicycles [he/him]
      ·
      9 days ago

      I dunno, this feels like a victimless crime, even if the perpetrator is unequivocally bad

    • CarbonScored [any]
      ·
      9 days ago

      Yeah. The Mirror is about half a step away from the Daily Heil (and had plenty of it's own nazi supporting articles).

  • nothx [he/him]
    ·
    9 days ago

    The closest thing to reality this guy ever gets is when the court asks him to explain his sweat gland disorder.

    • AmericaDelendaEst [comrade/them]
      ·
      9 days ago

      I googled this shit and all the articles are like "temporary anhidrosis is medically unheard of" but I literally didn't sweat for like 5 years

      I didn't have "overdose of adrenaline" though, I had "all my skin came off from sun poisoning"

      • the_itsb [she/her, comrade/them]
        ·
        9 days ago

        medically unheard of

        doesn't that just mean that it wasn't confirmed by a professional, noted in some records, and had those records added to a pile from which statistics are drawn?

        once upon a time, I was working as a bank teller and my coworkers noticed blood on my forehead, so I went to the bathroom and yep, there was a tiny amount of blood coming out of the pores of my forehead for no apparent reason (no pain, no visible injury, etc).

        coworkers made me go to the ER, where I was eventually diagnosed with "a rash" and sent home

        I never followed up with anyone about it

        did a case of "spontaneous dermal bleeding of unknown etiology" get reported to the local health department that year? did they pass that on to the state? 🤔

  • CloutAtlas [he/him]
    ·
    9 days ago

    Idk where else to post this but

    Anglo > English implies

    Saxon > Sexish

    The Anglo-Saxons could have gone down a slightly different route and embrace the Saxon part more than the Anglo part, but all else remains the same, we could be making fun of Sexish people instead of making fun of the English.

    • FourteenEyes [he/him]
      ·
      9 days ago

      they were given the choice between sex or being British and they made their choice

    • 7bicycles [he/him]
      ·
      9 days ago

      In this alternative universe I'd sound like a racist turbocrank over my refusal to call the british people sexish

    • Krem [he/him]
      ·
      9 days ago

      saxophone speakers in the saxosphere jazz-passion

  • CarbonScored [any]
    ·
    9 days ago

    To be honest, it's a bit annoying seeing even this place buy into the UK monarchy sensationalised twoddle.

    Yes King dumb, no he's not so dumb he doesn't recognise cling film, no he doesn't rely on potions. He's just some guy who's in a stupid position and should be deposed.

    • Awoo [she/her]
      ·
      edit-2
      9 days ago

      no he doesn't rely on potions

      Charles took an active role in trying to get the NHS to use homeopathy over multiple decades. The queen also had an official homeopathic physician.

      • CarbonScored [any]
        ·
        edit-2
        9 days ago

        Oh for sure, I'm not saying he's not touting nonsense. I was referring to some similar bogus news story saying he eschewed all healthcare in favour of potions, which was based solely on a throwaway remark by Nigel Farage of all people.

        • Awoo [she/her]
          ·
          9 days ago

          Yeah I'm just saying there's much more to this one than trite headlines.

          https://www.the-scientist.com/the-unscientific-king-charles-iii-s-history-promoting-homeopathy-70544

          Pretty decent summary. Dude is a dangerous moron and the day he dies will be a good one.

          • CarbonScored [any]
            ·
            edit-2
            8 days ago

            Once again, I fully agree. That isn't the headline I was referring to.

    • niph [she/her]
      ·
      9 days ago

      This place also loves leaning into making fun of how dumb Musk is, and I find it cringe for similar reasons. It’s still buying into the same circus

    • -6-6-6-@lemmygrad.ml
      hexagon
      ·
      9 days ago

      I already mentioned before to another commenter that I didn't take this seriously and used it as a vehicle for a joke about the King using it as a face-wrap because it'd be funny.