This is why the prospect of bazinga brains colonizing space is so laughable. An astronaut is basically if you roll together hardships of polar scientist, ocean oil rig worker, submariner, and underwater welder into one, and throw them into an environment that are even more inherently hostile to humanity more than all of those professions combined. For one those people only need to exercise to stay fit, not because their wouldn't literally withers because there's no gravity to hold your muscles together.
Sci-fi nerds everywhere are so high on settler fantasy that they thoughtlessly applies it to space. They're unaware that real life colonizers had it so easy because they're conquering lands that have been inhabited by people for centuries before their arrival. They came to lands where prime farming ground have been well known, where the local dangers have been catalogued, where the water sources have been charted, and the best crops for the local condition have been grown. Obviously none of those would be in space, it would be like if the settlers instead of colonizing fertile ground, instead have to settle the inside of fucking active volcano.
Everything beyond the karman line is not a "virgin" ground for us to exploit, but it's a massive expanse of nature completely alien to life from this planet with its own unknowable history that we must respect. Except that capitalist have as much respect of space as they have of anything else, which is why just like capitalism itself the commercialization of space is doomed to fail.
An astronaut is basically if you roll together hardships of polar scientist, ocean oil rig worker, submariner, and underwater welder into one, and throw them into an environment that are even more inherently hostile to humanity more than all of those professions combined.
Now add "chaperone" to the mix
I worked as just a chaperone for drunk rich people for a while and fuck that
Now imagine those rich drunk people think they did a better job than you by paying millions to larp as you for a day or two than fucked back off to Earth.
I know I’ve already said so in nearly every comment of mine in this thread, but I would 100% murder that billionaire. I’ve done a lot of work on my anger issues but there’s a fucking line
I mean it'd be one of the most based actions in human history for the first murder in space to be that of a billionaire.
Sci-fi nerds everywhere are so high on settler fantasy that they thoughtlessly applies it to space.
A lot of them don't even bother thinking about the settler part in their fantasy. It's Hans Zimmer music as the rugged humanity fuck yeah ubermensch steps onto a new planet, then roll credits.
That's what they think of: a "science victory" like in Civ and related games. It doesn't matter what happens afterward. It's all about the "win." :so-true:
Also, most astronauts quit pretty early, well before retirement, because it's so stressful. This is a job where literally the only way to get it is to devote your life to doing so, but even then, it's too stressful for most.
If our idiot-kings get their way, I highly doubt they will have easy or steady access to people with that level of dedication and competence. Maybe it won't matter to them because it's all about the pomp and circumstance and science as an aesthetic, not a practice.
If that happens, they will learn the hard way that space is very unforgiving and doesn't care how rich you are.
I think a large part of the grift is talking about going into space and collecting money from credulous idiots (and governments ran by credulous idiots).
I hope they all agree that launching billionaires out of the airlock is the best course forward and continue to do so until the billionaires get the fucking picture
I mean, even setting aside the job stress, they deal with radiation, muscle atrophy, apparently something bad happens to your eyes if you spend extended time in null g. And you're cooped up in a tin can that smells like twenty years of packaged meal farts whenever you're on the ISS.
Seriously. Astronaut may be the most demanding job there is in necessary qualifications, responsibilities, workload, stress etc.
The sheer amount of things you have to be good at to qualify for boarding the ISS is insane, it's the absolute last job some dumbfuck should be able to buy their way into
That was metal. Please post that as its own thread somewhere!
Ugh, just read the comments. That meme about weird nerds leaping in front of :my-hero: remains very real.
If this is some weird commentary about billionaires being evil, you must want to doom humanity to never reach the stars. We need those motivated individuals, those visionaries who will push us to the heavens.
Okay Brendon
you must want to doom humanity to never reach the stars
I swear that bazinga brains all get their talking points from the same script, almost word for word.
I posted it in c/art once. Good idea to check out that comm.
your existence is an affront to the betterment of mankind
The whole thing is metal
Note the type of hammer the unseen revolutionary uses :hammer-sickle:
The wealthy really are a burden on society, aren't they?
Fucking dickheads, space is terrifying and still being studied and the ISS is a lab. It's not a tourist resort for you to just fuck around in.
The crew arrived on the ISS on April 9, packing an impressive experimental payload with them that included experiments on holoportation, human cells, and high-precision optical lenses. But being that it was their first time in space, and that they are neither professional astronauts nor researchers, some of the experiments ended up taking quite a lot longer than anticipated. One experiment that was meant to take just two and a half hours based on pre-flight training ended up occupying double that amount of time, according to entrepreneur and investor Larry Connor, who was a member of the Ax-1 mission.
I would be so pissed if all my work had to be delayed because I had to babysit some chucklefucks who didn't care about science. What a waste.
Billionaires really are vampires. Whenever they're around a small number of workers, the surplus labor they extract becomes even more obvious.
Capital is dead labour, which, vampire-like, lives only by sucking living labour, and lives the more, the more labour it sucks.
:marx-goth:
Imagine getting to go to space and then complaining when someone asks you to help you do some cool space science. I'm so fucking jealous of this rich assholes. I fucking hate this shit system. Give those seats to people who care.
The wealthy really are a burden on society, aren’t they?
:surprised-pika:
If Jeff Bezos came into my lab and made my experiments take double the time because he couldn’t grab a rat or couldn’t use a fucking pipette I would force feed him paraformaldehyde.
The ISS is one of relatively few places where you could absolutely pull rank on Jeff Bezos and duct tape him and shove him in a closet if he complained.
I would be livid if I lost that much time in the ISS lab to billionaire fuckery. Astronomers complain about how telescope time is the hardest research time to get ahold of but that's not true: it's pretty clearly the space lab, where most of the research has to be designed by large committee because the time is so precious. But sure, let's have chuckle fuck billionaire play PhD, why not, surely it won't inflate their already supermassive egos
Just imagining that clip of Don Jr where three assistants hold his hand through the process of choosing a cover for his magazine, but it's doctors and a hundred million dollar science experiment in space.
Really hope one of those astronauts writes a book about having to babysit billionaires in space.
I hope all of those astronauts muder that billionaire, stage it as a suicide, and never tell a soul
He got the space madness and just spaced himself out of the airlock :shrug-outta-hecks:
I think they can go through the airlocks from a mental break and then die immediately in the vacuum of space. I never stick with my colonies long enough to build space ships.
Because the supposed coolest thing America has ever done keeps getting budget cuts so we can crank out more cops, prisons, soldiers and drones.
When bazinga brains talk about the uplifting news of privatized space tourism, the unspoken part is that it almost always comes from subsidies that were matched by cuts to NASA. That fucking Tesla commercial in space? Almost dollar for dollar, NASA's budget was cut by the same amount that went into subsidizing that, and multiple actual scientific inquiry missions were scrapped for it, including a comet interception and a solar probe.
:sicko-yes: Also if I were a space pirate, I'd call that walking the plank
Bilionaires as they walk into my spaceship. "Cool the airlock has inlaid wood floors"
Wouldn't be practical probably...it'd warp from the boiling moisture in it every time you gave a billionaire astronaut wings.
Having it be under some kind of clear laminate material or something like it should solve that while still getting the point across
The process is called wood stabilisation. Moisture is sucked out in vacuum and replaced with a resin. Can look damn cool, I've seen it used as fountain pen blanks and knife handles.
You'd have to aim them in a decaying orbit so they don't become a navigation hazard.
The crew arrived on the ISS on April 9, packing an impressive experimental payload with them that included experiments on holoportation, human cells, and high-precision optical lenses. But being that it was their first time in space, and that they are neither professional astronauts nor researchers, some of the experiments ended up taking quite a lot longer than anticipated. One experiment that was meant to take just two and a half hours based on pre-flight training ended up occupying double that amount of time, according to entrepreneur and investor Larry Connor, who was a member of the Ax-1 mission.
I thought the way to get rich was to rise and grind, but you're telling me that these rich people only have experience in throwing their money around and making others grind for them?
Rich people tend to have wild overestimations of their own abilities, and the agency in charge of the space mission presumably wanted to maximize the amount of experiments that could be run, since spaceflight is pretty ressource intensive, so I imagine that they just asked him if he could / wanted to, and the dumbass went "yeah I could do that".
Aww... did having to do actual work for the first time in your life ruin your space vacation?
tfw you have no peasants to do labor for you in space :ooooooooooooooh:
Shocking that a bunch of heroic captains of industry couldn't pick up 4 years of intensive, monk-like training after a dozen years of full time obsessively meeting the basic qualifications in a month of dicking around in a water tank.
A not insubstantial proportion of the Astronaut corps never see space.
