• ped_xing [he/him]
    hexbear
    151
    2 months ago

    If I were a driver, I'd simply keep my automobile on land.

    • LibsEatPoop [any]
      hexbear
      81
      2 months ago

      Don't forget the submarine controlled by a discount Xbox controller.

      • YourMom [he/him]
        hexbear
        61
        2 months ago

        Always felt bad for the kid that was afraid of going in the sub and his fuckin dad pressured the shit out of him into doing it

      • radiofreeval [she/her]
        hexbear
        35
        2 months ago

        The problem wasn't the controller, the problem was that the Xbox controller was one of the best design decisions on that sub.

        • CthulhusIntern [he/him]
          hexbear
          6
          2 months ago

          I don't even hate the fact that it used a controller (if what I heard is correct, imperialists also take design influence for fighter jets from game controllers), but the only controls for the submarine used FUCKING BLUETOOTH? Not a single emergency hard wired controller?

          • radiofreeval [she/her]
            hexbear
            2
            2 months ago

            I said the best design decision, not a good design decision. Also I think the emergency ballast release was automatic. A Bluetooth controller is probably better than a homemade control system because COTS is usually a good idea.

  • happybadger [he/him]
    hexbear
    112
    2 months ago

    Curious. I backed my car up earlier and it was super easy. Didn't drown, didn't need to break a window to save myself. Maybe I'm just infinitely smarter.

      • happybadger [he/him]
        hexbear
        63
        2 months ago

        Because I'm too busy thinking of ways to not drown in a pond.

        • NephewAlphaBravo [he/him]
          hexbear
          39
          edit-2
          2 months ago

          during a gold rush, don't be a gold miner, be a not-drowning-in-ponds-advice seller

    • JayTwo [any]
      hexbear
      27
      2 months ago

      Making a three point turn in a newer model x requires tapping on a touchscreen to shift between drive and reverse.

      There's also an optional "smart" feature that's supposed to automatically switch into either drive or reverse but because it uses cameras and not ultrasonic sensors shadows often confuse it.

      • emizeko [they/them]
        hexbear
        13
        edit-2
        2 months ago

        newer model x requires tapping on a touchscreen to shift between drive and reverse

        you have got to be kidding me. how the fuck do people tolerate this garbage

        • JayTwo [any]
          hexbear
          3
          edit-2
          2 months ago

          If you got the time to watch a video on it, it's from a stan but despite his praise (well mostly) it's a pretty good demonstration of how absolutely ridiculous it is now.
          Either swiping on the side of the screen, relying on a beta feature that doesn't work well, or touching essentially hidden capacitive "buttons" that by default aren't lit.

          Edit: this is for the 2021 model S but the 2021+ model X works the same way.

          https://youtu.be/dJdhzFCVkg8

        • JayTwo [any]
          hexbear
          11
          2 months ago

          Yeah I'm not gonna mourn her passing and from context clues she was probably a little drunk. But Tesla still "innovated" out the physical shifter making this sort of thing an inevitability.

  • anaesidemus [he/him]
    hexbear
    103
    2 months ago

    billionaire shipping industry CEO, tragically drowned in a pond

    tragically???

    fuckin-deserve porky-scared

  • Elon_Musk [none/use name]
    hexbear
    99
    2 months ago

    one fire department crew arrived on the scene 24 minutes after getting a call.

    So she was already long dead

    Efforts to resuscitate Chao began immediately with paramedics attempting to revive her for 43 minutes.

    Only billionaires get this treatment

    • CloutAtlas [he/him]
      hexbear
      45
      2 months ago

      The Virgin Angela Chow: "Help, I, a billionaire, am drowning in my Redditmobile, gurgle gurgle" wastes hours of firefighter and paramedic time and resources. Waterlogged corpse gets dunked on.

      The Chad Aaron Bushnell: "I will no longer be complicit in genocide, free Palestine" wastes hours of Israeli embassy security and US police time and resources. Immortalised in flames, gets vigils from China to Lebanon.

    • 7bicycles [he/him]
      hexbear
      4
      2 months ago

      So she was already long dead

      Isn't the cybertruck nominally kind of waterproof or something? I mean even your average car takes a while to sink and fill up with water, I could imagine the cybertruck holding out shittily but survivably for a good, I dunno, 20 minutes or so?

  • MorelaakIsBack [comrade/them]
    hexbear
    88
    2 months ago

    capitalists will sell you the rope you'll hang them with themselves the tesla they'll drown themselves in

  • SkingradGuard [he/him]
    hexbear
    84
    2 months ago

    I know someone died but it's a capitalist in a bazingamobile, I can't help but laugh michael-laugh

  • BeamBrain [he/him]
    hexbear
    83
    2 months ago

    This makes 6 billionaires in the past year who were killed by water. Has Poseidon joined the cause of the proletariat?

    • CloutAtlas [he/him]
      hexbear
      43
      2 months ago

      The German that got vaxxed 217 times has not drowned. Curious.

      • CliffordBigRedDog [he/him]
        hexbear
        16
        2 months ago

        its like a bell curve you're safe when your unvaxxed or overvaxxed

        just do the opposite of what Fauci tells you and you're good

    • AbbysMuscles [she/her]
      hexbear
      52
      edit-2
      2 months ago

      His joker laughing reminds me of my own maniacal breakdown. Back in 2020 when it was looking increasingly clear that Bernie was going to get ratfucked, I was getting drunk in a discord call with some friends. I randomly saw that fucking picture of Brandon's exploding eye. And I just fucking lost it. Laughing hysterically, unable to breathe or move or think. All I could choke out was "we're all gonna fucking die". I guess we're all allotted one of those moments in our lifetime.