SALUTE
I have barely watched Breaking Bad
As a reminder, be sure to properly give content warnings and put sensitive subjects behind proper spoiler tags. It's for the mental health of not just your comrades, but yourself as well.
Here is a screenshot of where to find the spoiler button.
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Let's have another good week everyone
eating
You already know you shouldn't be doing this and it seems you know you're doing it as a form of self-harm. We all kinda like eggnog so please don't hurt her.
In terms of hrt later, when you start, you will need a higher body fat% to get woman style curves. There are so many rail thin trans girls who are eternally confused that they don't have full curves or even boobs at all and just can't seem to connect their eating to not having enough fat to redistribute. E bodies have a higher body fat%, they're supposed to, that's what they're meant to look like.
voice
Voice training really does work, yes it will work for you. It takes a long time and it goes slow so it's hard to measure progress unless you (ugh) record yourself - which is cursed. It's not ruined, it's basically the only thing we have control over that isn't based on money or genetics. You can get the voice you want. I can't even do my old boy voice anymore, which was weird when I tried. You can get voice surgery but that obviously costs money.
Feeling sad and bitter about your voice is normal, you "just" have gender dysphoria. You'll be okay, I swear this gets better. It's slow, yeah, but the time is going to pass anyway and how do you want to sound in 2 years right?
spoiler
Eggnog will be fine, and yea I'll start eating more when I get hrt (assuming I don't quit this before then anyway).
I'm not rail thin, I appreciate your concern. Sorry you had to read my sh posting.
It'll only work if I put in effort, obviously. I'm terrible at putting effort in tbh. We'll see. I definitely need to give it a good try because I can't imagine being a girl with this voice. And I don't want to be a guy either. I'm glad my feelings are normal. The bitterness especially feels like something that I feel guilty about feeling. Thank you again.