lmao lets go digging in the dessert for free ammo that shits expensive
Now I'm wondering how many well-armed preppers die unnoticed in their compounds each year, just sitting on a real life loot dungeon, probably complete with traps.
big sign that says "no ammo over here" pointing to a hole with random shit draped over it
I sincerely haven't laughed this hard in a good long while, holy shit.
How does a prepper not have a hand-cranked can-opener? Or a P-38? Or a fucking Leatherman/Victorinox with one?
solar panel phone charger
Fuck just realized I have one of those two.
I'm more shocked that a prepper who presumably has stepped foot in a military surplus store at least once doesn't have one, lol. Most of those stores just give 'em away.
P-38 J Lightning and there was some other variant called the Black Widow, for what its worth.
Still have my eating kit from cadets and it's useful at least once a month, though there's no p38.
But how the hell do I, le epic armchair communist wine spinster have a full 72hr wilderness survival kit and this chud not?
I mean I can kinda see it. When I was looking into making a bug-out bag/shelter in place bag for Canada, a solid 95% of advice I could find was over the top Jason Bourne fanfic wankery about "which guns to choose for SHTF", how much ammo to stock, burying caches outside of town to go to, laughable "Grey man" shit, etc. It's LARPing but for chuds. Most of them just wanna be part of The Club and fantasize about shooting people they don't like.
This is honestly the part that makes me think it's fake, took it a bit too far. I'm only like 52% sure though, wouldn't be surprised to be wrong.
Not one swiss army knife in their whole house? Fucking incredible. I bet they only own "tactical knives" with black blades and serrated edges.
I've never purchased a can opener of any variety and I've owned or acquired probably 4 or 5 by pure happenstance.
I've never even seen one clamp on and twist kind, I've only seen this kind.
Does that even make sense? Most electric can openers are battery operated, not like, plug into the wall...
My parents have one that plugs into the wall. It's weird.
EDIT: one of these
Oh, like a built in house canopener. Wild to think a guy with prepper kits doesn't have a can opener that isn't affixed to his wall.
We moved into a house with one of those. I don't think it ever successfully opened a can.
This is the type of dude I'm talking about when libs start getting paranoid about a second civil war. One week in the Poconos and these morons would be dead from drinking stagnant water.
It was pretty funny until I saw the electric can opener. Then I woke my wife up laughing too hard. Please tag this appropriately.
Sometimes I feel like I'm not outdoorsy and capable enough because it'll take a few minutes for my impromptu firepits to really catch and flame, but then I read about prepper guys who only use "gas powered firepits", which I didn't even know were a thing.
I felt like a city boy for rushing through and partially resetting my trap line so I could get back to town to watch basketball, meanwhile some wannabe Wolverine chud who dreamt of this kinda situation forever spoiled his meat and can't even open up cans is freezing himself to death in his tactical outfit
i always wonder how many preppers would die of attrition if there was a collapse of society, looks like it would be a decent amount
Most. Nobody outside of communities that are organized are going to make it. I mean some people that really know how to live off the land like intense bushcraft skills sure, but mall ninja's like this guy will become blood bags for some warlord.
American individualism would absolutely kill most prepers. There's a reason humans have always lived in groups.
The actual best advice would never be found on a prepping sub, but is mentioned a lot on /r/collapse: join a group/community. Humans are intensely cooperative and want things to generally not suck. So join some people who are just making their way in the world. Maybe learn a skill, like shoe repair, so you can contribute.
Sounds like some people have been watching too much Doomsday Preppers
Yeah, I've done extended hikes, know what I can eat in the bush, and if civ goes I'm likely dead in 6 weeks on my own. And it doesn't even snow here.
You know, I think prepping in theory is good. Yeah there's of course a lot of reactionaries among preppers but quite a few people all across the political spectrum. Especially if you view prepping in terms of your community and not just yourself. I got into it myself a bit. Half the fun was just thinking through scenarios and what you need and how you would respond.
But the very first, basic, 1A scenario every prepper thinks through is "what if the power goes out for an extended period of time". The fact that they didn't have a manual can opener is really, I don't know the right word here. Just your typical reactionary prepper who thinks 90% of prepping is guns and tacticool gear.
Prepping is really only about stopping the “urban hordes” that want to steal your panini maker.
Right wingers into prepping, yes. I think there's a place for prepping on a small scale i.e. if you're snowed in without electricity for a long time. And I think there's also a place for left wing prepping too.
I'm pretty sure this story is made up. Anyone who does canning has a manual can opener.
Also, the account is a shitlib. I think they're just getting off on the idea of Texans suffering right now.
Yeah, the story is funny and all, but the can opener thing is pushing it a little too far for me. Ive met the "suburbanite who found out about prepping in the last month and blew several grand on tacticool shit" type, but not having a can opener is like telling me they don't have a flashlight or bottled water
In New Zealand, this sort of stuff, like Preparation, food supply, how to engage with emergency response, community prep and mutual aid etc is all taught in "Civil Defence" classes in primary and early intermediate school, along with flood, earthquake, volcano, tsunami, and other basic disaster prep and response.
Coincidentally, NZ has 20 Covid deaths, 4 orders of magnitude lower per capita than the USA.
A lot of reactionaries just want to live in a Fallout game so they can unironically be the NCR or Brotherhood of Steel or whatever other cringe faction that just looks cool, has guns, and is functionally identical to bandits.
Their plan for the grid going down was natural gas?
lol.
if your fridge goes out below zero then you can move the food into a cold area.
Hypothetically couldn’t you dump a bunch of the snow that’s outside in there to keep the temp low?
Survivalist guy didn’t buy a propane camping grill? Or a non electric can opener? I’m not a survivalist dork and even I have both those things.
Electric can openers seem like peak capitalism. A can opener is such a simple thing that requires very little effort, but what if it was 10x the price, had a bunch more things that could break, and is useless in a power outage?
if you're going through high volume you can open up large cans way faster with the table-mounted crank kind than you can with an electric opener
There are situations where they are useful but I cannot understand why an able-bodied adult would get an electric can-opener for their home.
A can opener is such a simple thing that requires very little effort
And you can get them in fun bougie colors like my teal with gold flakes can opener that a friend gave me from Anthropologie
reminder that spez is a prepper and believes "I will probably be in charge, or at least not a slave, when push comes to shove."
remember that when you read this thread
Knowing the psychos that live in the Central Valley next to Silicon Valley, they'll capture him and churn him up into fertilizer for their grapefruit orchards.
Which yes means that he is technically correct that he "won't be a slave"
How the hell did their food spoil in the middle of freezing weather! Couldn't they just leave it outside in a container and bury it in the snow? Also has this chud not heard of a gas bottle and matches/a lighter to get your gas operated stuff working when the power and gas line go out? Or even just making a fire with wood/charcoal and cooking over it? What about a hand cranked can opener that almost everyone has? Or some powerbanks and solar chargers to keep electronic devices alive? I live in a country with regular rolling blackouts and have survived fine thus far. I refuse to believe people are this ignorant about how shit works, it allows me to sleep better at night.
I'm amazed that the concept of a small camping burner or a supply of fuel tablets never occurred to these chuds. How can you become a survivalist and apparently never spent 3 days on a hike?
How can you become a survivalist and apparently never spent 3 days on a hike?
LARPing
Hell even that electric can opener should work just fine if you manually spin the can once the blade is in.
