Imagine allowing a private corporation to implant a proprietary technology in your soul-jello.
The fuck.
Also imagine giving these dipshits access to your brain meats, they were roasting dozens of monkeys for no reason just a couple months ago.
Actually he'll probably just make people pay to get one
People signed up for the cybertruck, they'll sign up for anything
Roasting puts it in perspective I think. Imagine knowing how much heat computer chips put out, and still thinking shoving one in someone's brain is a good idea.
It's one of the major limiting factors on brain implants right now. Heat management at that tiny scale is a serious problem.
That is the only thing Neuralink has accomplished that other firms didn't do decades ago - they've managed to apply more probes per square inch, which would theoretically allow for more fine grained control. But they're sloppy, so they kill their monkeys, and their implant can't do anything that wasn't explored ten or twenty years ago.
:frothingfash:: "The vaccine will microchip me!"
:so-true:: "I'm going to be first in line to get my Neuralink, you should get it too! It will help you with being more normal, like me! It will help you be more productive in your job, and it will track you to make sure you only patronize places the 4chan council approves of! Wouldn't want you making Jesus sad, now would we?"
The "it's always projection" rule having literally no limit is wild.
Oh, so we criticize Musk for testing on intelligent creatures like monkeys, he listens and tests on far dumber SpaceX fans instead, and we're still complaining? There's no pleasing you people
:rat-salute-2: A salute to the brave libertarian martyr who volunteers to instantly die and have their consciousness sent to Cyber Hell
If your social credit score gets too low they'll turn off one of your eyes!
I fucking hate social credit jokes when "anti-woke" people quite literally have a social credit system as part of their ideology.
jailbreaking your brain computer to run Linux with some dodgy instructions from a forum
We detected a bad thought about Musk so we decided to stop your heart for 30 seconds. This is your first warning - Neuralink Human Resources
Even seeing that as a joke....
Anyone feeling up for homesteading in Norway?
This shit is 100% going to be used on prisoners to make them live out 200 year sentences in an hour like those foreboding torment nexus articles warned us about.
YAAAAAY!!!! YES!! ILL BE ABLE TO GET IT IN THE NEAR FUTURE AFTER ALL!!😭😭😭❤️❤️❤️❤️
"Phew, after the disastrous results with all those dead and brutalized monkeys I was afraid I wouldn't get to try it! Thankfully decades of Neoliberal deregulation makes it so that won't be an impediment or even a concern!"
:doomjak:
Traditionally they pay poor people and college students to do medical studies, or people in the global south who aren't adequately informed of the risks.
There will eventually be companies that require it for all their employees.
if they ever actually figure these things out, there will absolutely be pop-up thought-ads
Those of us with ADHD already get them :think-about-it:
On mobile so I can't see what the actual emoji text is :(
Has a purpose been stated for these devices, or are they just putting them in for fun essentially?
Brain machine interface is the main one, in essence controlling machines with direct thought power.
Cool on paper, with open technology, not cool if proprietary, closed and controlled by literal monsters who may or may not drop support at any time ever leaving a chunk of outdated and no longer supported metal in your skull.
It's cool in science fiction. The only thing you can do with the current state of the art is move cursors around and play simple video games. And the state of the art is way better than what muskrat's people can do.
If you combine that method of control with AR headsets you have a computer that doesn't need a screen or buttons to press. Something like Google Glass becomes the phone itself, and the screen it projects for only the user is controlled entirely with internal thought.
There are definitely applications. But fuck off am I ever getting anything in my head that isn't completely open source.
sony already tried transcranial magnetic stimulation in the 00s, honestly think these nerds only want to mix hardware and wetware for the aesthetics
like if we can't grow some kind of computational substrate directly into our brainstems, why bother? just take the noninvasive option jfc
TMS supposedly works well for treating depression. It's next on my list of cool medical interventions to try to cure my treatment resistant bipolar.
I think I might remember Musk pulling from Nueralink to pay off Tesla's debts at some point, which leads me to believe that the real purpose is to get rubes to invest in it.
So Godamn bleak. Because you know the end goal for all of this is P R O D U C T I V I T Y
I hope it massively fails, but I wouldn’t be surprised if more ghouls try copycats in the future
lol at the guy in the comments screaming about Mark of the Beast. But he has Twitter blue? Bro if you think Elon is the antichrist why did you give him money?
Elon is terminally online and is known to read tweets that mention him. A couple bucks to get Twitter Blue so you can have a pretty solid chance of Elon directly seeing you call him a demon might be worth it to some.
Look I'm not super religious but this is absolutely Mark of the Beast type shit
:soypoint-2: the next step in human evolution! If you don’t get chipped, you’ll be left behind!
