This comment has woken me up to the reality of chapo.chat's desperate need for crying lady liberty emojis.
I will withhold posting hog every day until my boy Fidel gets an emoji
Even then, trying to get them to realise their dream doomstack army is literally impossible is hard. They have no idea just how much surplus value it takes to make a single mounted knight (a lot, horses are expensive). Or how extended a war a medieval economy can take. They've got no knowledge of how the baggage train works and women's role in keeping an army functioning, let alone where all the wood for their pretty longbows are going to come from or the cloth for their clothes.
They have no idea on transport logistics, or why a Gambeson is a more effective armor piece than full plate in most cases.
It's all, I'll just march through the desert with 20,000 men in full plate and no baggage train and besiege this castle.
mail is the best armour, with lamellar coming in a distant second, and i will not budge from this
one of the best things about chainmail was that it was cheap and easy to mass produce by comparison to other options
not that that meant some rando serf could "afford" one, but it being a cheap easy to manufacture and extremely effect option definitely makes it the top tier
I’d love a fantasy role playing game that incorporates a robust armor system that allows you to mix together different pieces of accurate medieval armor, like gambeson under chainmail or chainmail under a tunic.
There's a weird experimental game called Exanima, which currently just has a dungeon crawler mode and an arena fighter mode, but it does this extremely well. Many many layers of armor and they all affect how you are damaged based on the physics of the weapon and how it is swung.
Downside is that no one moves like a trained fighter, they look like random peasants who are very drunk have been given weapons and armor.
But it's still interesting.
coughs in kingdom come deliverance
some people would probably pillory me for it cause chuds love that game, but its got a good combat and armour system, and the female love interest literally saves the main characters life in the intro section of the game, so it at least tried
hell yeah, an rpg tolkien universe game that wasnt rpg-lite is sorely missing
edit: honestly the specs required for kcd arnt too bad. its a few years old now, and i was able to run it on my comp that was a couple years old back when it first came out
fallout 4 def is more requirement intensive than kcd on my system. obviously thats subject to your rigs parts, but...
ill look into those! i like me some meaty roguelikes/lites
playing Hades which just came out at the moment and loving it for all the greek pantheon shenanigans so far
nice.
caves of qud is a great ascii roguelike along those lines that came out recently, so im not at all opposed to games that are like that
lol.
stanning a game thats about getting revenge for the murder of a loving family with an adoptive father, where the main character bumbles around and wouldve been dead in the first five days if not for a woman being a badass... to own the libs?
shits wild.
why a Gambeson is a more effective armor piece than full plate in most cases.
That's not really fair. Gambesons are overall more efficient, by far, but full plate is definitely better armor. Like almost inconceivably better. Like, a dude walking at you in full plate armor before guns were invented is basically like a tank in our modern era. There is nothing you can reasonably do to hurt that person unless you're also wearing full plate armor, at which point the game becomes about who comes out of the awkward clunky wrestling match on top.
Of course, that's because full plate armor is an incredibly specialized suit made specifically for one person by a man with decades of practice using very expensive material and hours upon hours of labor. It, of course, can't be given to very many people, and is very unsuited for various environments. But it's still the best protection you can get in the medieval era.
Yes, it's far better, in dry weather, when you have mounts or don't have to travel far at risk of attack. I'd probably say the Brigandine is probably the best all-rounder armor. But if you need 10,000 men fast, you're going to struggle even with mail outfitting
As for invulnerable, well "Haha Billhook goes yoink!" as James IV found out.
Military history is like 75% of all history that is taught in US schools.
History class in the U.S. goes like this
B.C. -> A.D. -> Roman Empire -> Dark Ages -> Renaissance -> 0 B.A. (Before America) -> World War II -> "Welcome to two-thousand-and-current-year, the end of history"
yeah me too. for us history was the revolutionary war, civil war, repeat for six years.
Sorry, wasn't that clear but the year 0 B.A. was supposed to be a stand-in for the founding of the U.S. and all the civil religion bullshit that goes along with it. Maybe the B.A. bit was too abstract of a punchline there shrugs
I suspect it's like that in most places. Focusing on who was in power and war was how I was taught history in school in Russia.
I always thought it was just straight up racism and white supremacy as to why kids got into that shit, no?
Crusader Kings players.
Granted, half of them are racists/white supremacists, but not all.
Thank god my friends are on the communist side. Our current campaign were playing as the three major allies except we’re flipping communist. Funny how on the american tree all the good policies need communist support or turn you communist (guaranteed housing, complete desegregation, net worth tax, elderly care, etc)
You can also fight and win the peasants war to show the revolutionary potential of the peasant. Turn Germany into peasant republics.
I feel like I'm playing the wrong games. How does one learn this power.
I mean I like reading about it and I'm a pizza delivery driver whos out of college till covid is cured, I aint into the racist shit tho I think it's an interesting period of history
How do people get sucked into this shit? Even when I was a dumbass kid I thought this shit was really fucking creepy and pathetic.
Critical support for the Crusades and their efforts to get every semi-devout catholic in christendom killed
eh, not worth it at the cost of wholesale slaughter of jews, polytheists, muslims, and heterodox Christians killed
It's like you're a sheep and you watch a documentary of a bunch of sheep in the past go "baa-baaaa" as they happily enter a slaughterhouse. Then they show you the slaughter. Then you go home and excitedly go "baa-baaaa." Pick better heroes ffs.
The city fell because a single monk wiggled through a hole and was so hyped up with a mace in each hand that the Byzantine guardsmen ran away, giving him time to widen the hole and let more Crusaders in.
I've always been fond of the irony that WWI was fought by, and led directly to the destruction of, the three remaining monarchies that claimed to be the successor states of Rome. Kaiser, Tsar, and the Turkish Sultan who claimed Rum among his titles.
How did the Tsar get off claiming to be the successor to Rome? To my knowledge the Romans never got anywhere close to Russia. If anything the Tsar should've claimed to be the successor to the Mongols.
By pretending to be the successor to Byzantium through the Orthodox faith.
One of the Tsars also married a member of the last Byzantine dynasty. Though a member of the dynasty with a stronger claim sold the title to the king of France and also left it in his will to Ferdinand and Isabella, so the French and Spanish monarchs claimed it for a while too. You'd think monarchs with actual power would refrain from giving themselves fake titles over land they don't control, because it kind of calls into question the legitimacy of their other titles, and because it might give ideas to people who want their land. But most of them seem to love giving themselves dozens of meaningless titles.
How did the Tsar get off claiming to be the successor to Rome?
white people and wewuzzery, name a more iconic combination
i'm pretty sure rome claimed to be rome, it's a pretty redundant fix imo tbh
i used to be one of those guys, now i’m a dyke who still plays Paradox games
So what I'm reading is that you're still a g*mer... I guess people don't change 😔
The games are great to a point - their treatment of slavery is the most obvious. EU4, a game about colonization, slavery was one of the greatest factors in colonization => slaves are a non-factor in colonization + nobody consumes slaves, some places just produce them + abolishing slavery is like the least interesting decision you could make, no effect on anything. (Slavery is a little better in Vic2, to be fair.)
Also, world conquest is too easy. Geography, culture, religion have only a negligible effect. Anyone can conquer anyone and nobody really objects.
And there are no social problems, just a few negative stats you make go away with points. Society can only go up - money, technology, religion, absolutism, militarism, etc. - they only have positive effects.
Yeah, one of the biggest problems with EU4 from a gameplay standpoint IMO is that it does basically nothing to simulate the difficulties of ruling a giant empire, especially with a bunch of conquered peoples who in recent memory were independent. Once you reach a certain size in game, you have to fuck up massively for everything to collapse.
Right. And the game itself becomes tedious because you can't delegate responsibilities. Commanding a stack or two of troops is fun. Commanding 10 stacks (possibly on 3 fronts) where the greatest danger is 2 stacks ending up on a random low-development province together and losing thousands of soldiers to attrition is booooring. Same with a fleet of ships vs. several fleets that require micromanagement to avoid attrition on intercontinental voyages.
A better game would make you share responsibilities with intelligent AI - which would both save on tedious micro and lead to frequent entropy, as a region that doesn't need you and can defend itself can tell you to fuck off.
The community is a mixture of bad and not-as-bad-as-expected? Like they don't have the typical g*mer attitude towards e.g. LGBT folks or women, which is a low bar to pass but also impressive for a game community where declaring a holy war is a good thing that gets you land and prestige.
CK2 isn't the worst for sure, but HOI4's community isn't great. Admittedly, a game where you can literally play Hitler will probably attract a fash crowd
HOI4 definitely has the worst community, next to the Vicky community I'd say
It doesn't help that Hoi4, last I played, has in-game events for atrocities committed by the USSR and the UK, but not for those committed by the Nazis. That could have changed though, I haven't played vanilla hoi4 in a long time.
it really isnt the best. like if you look at the post history of a lot of the mods on reddit, theyre socialists. the motherfuckers just cant reign that shit in lmao its too much
I don't understand how people play CK II and somehow don't come away with the impression that every single noble was a scheming power-obsessed sociopath who would happily murder their infant relatives for political gain and only ever cared about religion as an excuse to murder people and take their land.
Or maybe they do understand that but think it's good for some reason??
and only ever cared about religion as an excuse to murder people and take their land
No, some of them took it seriously and spent all their time growing new varieties of roses, surreptitiously waking up friends who fell asleep during sermons, and launching weird abortive crusades against low-ranking Muslim nobles who were briefly rebelling against the Caliph due to a tax increase.
Sees a civil war in a nation with a different religion
"It's free real estate"
Also can't forget the people who decide to join a secret cult out of sheer boredom.
One of my favorite CK II stories is the time I was playing a random Italian count who heard the voice of Jesus giving him military advice, publically converted to a Christian heresy, then went on a crusade where he met a teacher who convinced him to secretly convert to Islam. That didn't stop him from launching holy wars in North Africa, but I had a plan that once I conquered enough I would publically convert to Islam so that I could turn around and launch holy wars into Italy - unfortunately I didn't realize I needed the DLC for that. But he founded a society for secret Muslims and it wasn't really going anywhere, the meetings were pretty much just him and his son hanging out and shooting the shit, but that's when, out of nowhere, the Holy Roman Emperor himself showed up.
My leader died and my son took over and the game automatically converted him to Christianity because I didn't have the DLC, and I figured that was that, it was fun while it lasted. Then, years later, completely out of the blue, I get a message the the Holy Roman Emperor has decided to publically embrace Islam. In one fell swoop, without a drop of blood, everything from Tunis to Denmark turned green (in the religious mapmode), and the Islamic world, which had been about the weakest I'd ever seen it, suddenly seemed poised to conquer Europe, thanks to the Holy Roman Caliphate.
I quit after that because A) "my work here is done" and B) I'm a cheap bastard and the DLC was expensive.
There's a TSA agent at the airport I work at who has a Deus Vult tattoo. He also has a straight pride tattoo, a blue lives matter tattoo, and an esoteric satanism tattoo.
Deus Vult is just yet another dog whistle to racism and bigotry.
It's two of those stick figure people from bathroom doors, a man and a woman, holding hands. Below that in a sans-serif font it reads "Straight Pride"
It's prominently placed on his right inner forearm.
The fact that the word crusader is used as a positive adjective in 2020 is nuts. My university had a floor in one of the dorms they were called the “4th floor crusaders”
Is there anything to them besides racism? Like, who fucking cares? It was the OG Europe uniting to shit on the ME because trade routes.
