Greetings, salutations even! I know this is a tough time of year for many of us, and all I ask is that you all make this the best week you possibly can. If the holidays are a struggle, take time to care for yourself if you can. Hang out with friends, do the things you love, find that sweet gender euphoria, follow what makes you truly happy. Oh, and continue to be yourselves :). Alright everybody, get ready for the largest mega I’ve ever written (I think).
Welcome to the TMGC mega! I have been hyping this up, probably for months now, and it’s my time to deliver on what might be the one of the best Fire Emblem experiences of all time. Buckle up, because this is going to be a long one. Most of the post will have light to no spoilers, but some parts may have a moderate amount of spoilers. With that out of the way, let’s find out what this game has to offer.
What is Fire Emblem? (no spoilers)
Fire Emblem is a strategy role-playing game series where you move your units to fight enemy units on a grid. The simplest way to think about it is like chess, where you have a large team of units fighting another large team of units, while your units are more like characters in that they have personalities. In most entries, these units are also able to have conversations with each other, providing more detail to the characters or the story, while also making the supported characters stronger. The games take place in a medical fantasy setting, with swords, axes, lances, different magics, and staves, with creatures like horses, pegasi, and wyverns.
What is Fire Emblem: The Morrow’s Golden Country (TMGC)? (no spoilers)
TMGC is a romhack of Fire Emblem: The Sacred Stones. It has it’s own story, characters, maps, mechanics, and for all intents and purposes, it’s a whole game built in the engine of Sacred Stones.
Story Outline and Characters (light spoilers)
TMGC features Blair as the protagonist. As a young lesbian lord from the Aercolyn territory within the Dalstinian Alliance, the game follows her around the continent and throughout the many nations. At first, the game features a pretty standard Fire Emblem plot, where one of the nations declares war on a couple of the others, which kicks the story into action. However, it evolves greatly beyond that point, with political drama, suspense, mystery, conspiracy, and so much more that make the story stand out. Of course, I also find the story to be very well written, especially when compared to many other Fire Emblem games. Along for the ride with Blair is Arin, her closest friend and self-taught tactician/advisor. They will also meet and recruit many of their friends and allies, both ones that existed before and during when the story takes place.
A little more on the story (moderate spoilers)
What exactly makes the story of TMGC compelling? Well, it’s the depth. The story involved Blair doing a lot to earn the approval of others, which often has her doing some very ethically questionable things. The plight of the commoner is shown in this game, with entire places on the continent being uninhabitable, yet having poverty-stricken inhabitants. Banditry runs rampant, and yet nobody has attempted to reach out to the struggling masses. The society is still feudal, most of the nations are either ruled by kings or lords. The class divide, that between noble and commoner, is very noticeable, and while it is not explicitly addressed like in some other entries, TMGC makes heavy use of “show don’t tell” with these kind of things. The many aspects of war are also shown, among those who do fight for their country. Mevion, the one country that managed to overthrow it’s king in a revolution, has a lot of revolutionaries who now live mundane lives due to being alienated by a revolutionary movement that was corrupted by opportunists are we still playing Fire Emblem? These people, along with the soldiers/knights of other nations, serve their countries or the people of them, and face the reality that what they fight for is not what they first thought. There are multiple characters that serve their lords and their country, but there are just as many deserters, those dissatisfied with how their lives ended up. There’s also political manipulation. Something happens that should lead to certain people taking power, but through political manipulation puppets are put in place. Countries are occupied by invading forces, and the results of that are felt. The frustrations of working within a political system is felt, as characters try again and again only to realize that it’s never going to work. That the only option when a political entity is inherently corrupt is to fight it.
Characters and Queer Representation (light spoilers, moderate character spoilers)
First of all, the characters in this game are all pretty great, there’s a lot of them, and their supports are written well. The game also lists pronouns for all of the characters in-game as well. Nice touch.
Apollo is a trans man. It’s not revealed that he is at first sight. He’s a man, lives as such, and doing none of his supports leave it at that. However, as his supports are triggered, he gets into more and more of his past. A support chain with the Archbishop reveals that he was rejected, and may have been kicked out by, his parents. A support chain with another trans enby character has them recognizing their similarities, even if they transitioned to different genders. It was good to see a trans character in the game, and while I have not seen all of the supports, I would hope that some of the others manage to go into this as well. To get the lore on this, as far as I know, make sure to do the support chain with Apollo and Vladimir.
There’s also many non-binary characters, including a protagonist character (Viridian) that gets their own arc of the story! Not to mention that sooooooo many of the characters are gay, bi, or pan it’s amazing. I could go over all of them, but I don’t actually know all of them! So, I need to go over a special example. TMGC’s poly characters. Heavy character spoilers, of course.
There’s also everyone’s favorite genderfluid (maybe) enby (maybe) possibly agender (maybe) assassin with a heart Olson. She goes by she/they/he pronouns. I have not seen much to this character, I’ve just gotten them, but his introduction already has her requesting a great title, and they’re a really good unit in combat (100% crit rates and a skill that insta-kills on crit). All hair the Ser Duke-Duchess o7
If Blair gets a B+ support, and crucially does not A support, five of the other women, they all get married at the end and start a polycule. I do not know exactly how the ending goes, I messed up the support chains, but I do know who the people are. Arin, Natasia, Avan, Yuyu, and Estelle. For the poly ending, Blair can only support these five people, which will make more sense once I go over game mechanics. This might be the most queer fire emblem of all time.
Mechanics (no spoilers)
On the topic of supports, each character can only have up to five supports. I’m guessing this is due to hardware limitations, and this is fine for many characters. However, for characters like Blair or Arin, supports have to be done more carefully, considering whether or not you like a character enough to go through a support chain, or even going through another playthrough to see all of the supports. These supports increase stats between the characters, just like in normal FE, but they can also allow for other things, such as class promotions or new weapon proficiency. These can be game changing, with some characters gaining classes that make them the best characters in the game, to once mediocre characters gaining a weapon proficiency that makes them stand out. This not only makes supports more rewarding, but allows for more replayability, with more builds available to the player. TMGC also takes features from other Fire Emblem games in an attempt to create a definitive experience. While the GBA games are great aesthetically and aged really well, they were lacking in some aspects that later games would innovate on. For example, Path of Radiance and Radiant Dawn make use of a Base Area that the player can use to go over supports and buy items and such. TMGC adds this, also changing supports to be story-based rather than combat-based a lot of the time. This means that characters don’t have to be fielded to go through their supports (most of the time). Considering how many characters are in this game, it’s a really helpful inclusion. TMGC also adds the save points that were in the DS games. This means a mistake doesn’t necessarily equal a reset, and it’s great for quality of life, especially considering how big some of these maps can get. Of course, it’s a double-edged sword. Not saving can leave you losing a lot of progress, and saving in a bad spot means you either have to either reset the whole level, or continue on without certain characters. Yes, this game has permadeath and only permadeath, there is no casual mode. However, there are also SOOOOOO many characters. Losing a few characters won’t be the end of the world gameplay-wise (I’m still a perfectionist for supports and story, although R.I.P. Butch, there goes My Hero), and you won’t likely find yourself unable to complete the game. TMGC adds personal skills as well, something that was featured in certain entries of the series, removed for the GBA games, and the added again for the following entries. These really make each individual character stand out. For example, you can have a normal mercenary, or you can have a mercenary with a hit chance skill, who can level up high stats except for skill. The game likes to do this a lot, and it allows for certain units to be strong while posing some sort of challenge. There are of course alternatives to these units, I don’t have to use Gaylord if I don’t want to (yes there’s a character named Gaylord, yes he’s really good, and yes, he’s straight). Something really interesting about certain skills is that they become combat arts. For a certain amount of weapon durability, skills like Luna (ignore defense/resistance) and Sol (heal HP in damage dealt) can be triggered manually on the player’s turn, rather than having a chance of activating during an attack. This can allow for many interesting strategies. There’s one boss that has really high resistance, defense, and legendary tome when most of the characters aren’t even promoted. However, Kenneth (a dark mage) has the Luna skill, which I can manually activate to come up with a plan to kill the unkillable. As a reward, I received a gem I could sell for 30,000 gold (that’s a lot). This also ends a defend map early, meaning it could be easier to keep certain weaker units safe. Back to the Tellius games (Path of Radiance & Radiant Dawn), TMGC adds movement skills! Characters can shove, smite, reposition, swap, etc. with other characters. This allows for great strategies, and I’ve found myself utilizing shove in order to push a certain unit into position a lot. It’s quite fun, and going back to the vanilla games is always a shock when I find that I cannot, in fact, push my units around for extra movement.
There’s also a lot of new classes, spells, weapons, animations and so much more!
I’m realizing that I’m treading a lot of the same ground as I did in my last post, and I’m trying to think about what else to write. The thing is, I don’t know what else to say. I don’t want to spoil the game for you wonderful people! So, you’re going to have to play this for yourself, especially those of you familiar with Fire Emblem.
For those of you unfamiliar with Fire Emblem, this might be difficult to pick up. If you’re willing to figure things out, or DM me for help (seriously, I’m willing to, don’t be shy :)), go right ahead! It’s a great game. However, there are definitely better games to help you get into Fire Emblem as a series. I would recommend Fire Emblem: Three Houses for the Nintendo Switch, or Fire Emblem Echoes: Shadows of Valentia for the 3DS. These games both go over basic Fire Emblem mechanics, while having some of the things TMGC takes inspiration from. Both games make use of combat arts, for example. They are also both really good games, and I would consider Shadows of Valentia to be one of my favorite Fire Emblem games, especially in it’s presentation. And yes, if I do a Fire Emblem mega next time, it’s going to be a Shadows of Valentia mega. Those who saw the last time I hosted the megathread are sure to recognize the characters :)
If you want to play Fire Emblem: The Morrow’s Golden Country, you’ll need a GameBoy Advance emulator (I use MGBA) as well as a copy of Fire Emblem: The Sacred Stones (shouldn't be hard to find). From there, download the patch (sorry for google link, the patch is regularly updated) and apply it to the Sacred Stones rom using RomPatcher. From there, you have a functioning TMGC rom and are ready to play.
I think that’s going to be all from me today. Again, I hope the holidays go well for all of you. I know this is a tough time of year, and I wish you all the best of luck. I also encourage you to keep up the posting in both the mega and tracha. I’ll likely spend some time in tracha myself, and who knows, maybe we can even talk about Fire Emblem. Don’t suffer in silence, feel free to vent frustrations. Love you all, let’s have a great week!
Join our public Matrix server! https://matrix.to/#/#tracha:chapo.chat
As a reminder, please do not discuss current struggle sessions in the mega. We want this to be a little oasis for all of us and the best way to do that is not to feed into existing conflict on the site.
Also, be sure to properly give content warnings and put sensitive subjects behind proper spoiler tags. It's for the mental health of not just your comrades, but yourself as well.
Here is a screenshot of where to find the spoiler button.
revolt
It feels like everyone else on this site has friends already. Idk if it's just overrepresentation of people who have communities, or if people who have nobody are supposed to keep quiet about it, or there's just something else I'm missing.
I try, I post about good days, I post about bad days, I post about dysphoria, I post about attraction, I post about cute outfits.
To feel this way in what I have found to be very much a pro-trans space is honestly hard. I don't know to proceed in order to build social bonds. My whole concept of friendship was based around being a depressed guy. I am in complete confusion.
It's frustrating to think that I deserve to stay that way
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I think that's going to be one of your biggest barriers to connecting with people. (Add an implied "...with mindful opsec" to everything below)
There aren't many times where people just reach out to say hi without some sort of connection. It doesn't have to be you previously starting a conversation or being a familiar presence in a social space, just something to indicate the two of you could carry a conversation. It could be something you're currently doing/working on, something you like, or maybe something you want to do in the future. You can signal that from posting, responding to others about things you mutually like, or just your pfp. I don't know how much you do this outside of hex, but I skimmed your comments before writing this and, aside from general support, I didn't really know what I would start a conversation with you about. You've talked a bit about going to college at an older age than the average student and you've mentioned being out in nature a few times, so I guess you like that too. Partial skill issue on my part, I'm not really a nature person lol, but with college you mostly just vent about anxieties. The rest of your posting is also mostly venting.
I'm not trying to be rude or saying tell us everything, but in a space like this or even a trans discord/matrix server most people aren't just going to dm you one day out of an implicit social duty. The community aspect of trans communities is powered by mutual interests. The friendships that seem to whither the quickest are the ones based solely on just being trans together. I can also personally say that my friendships based on just being sad together haven't lasted much longer. You don't have to be the one to reach out first to make friends (though it helps), but you do need to give someone a reason to reach out in the first place. You might eventually get that from venting, but I don't think it's going to the lasting friendship you're looking for. People are mindful of their capacity to give support and listen, they only have so much to offer. A connection started over one-sided venting is intimidating to a lot of people and that's not a reflection of them being shitty, it's just beyond what they're able to provide. Friendships work best when two people both bring something to them, which can be as simple as "friend who also enjoys thing that I love talking about" - that means the world to many people lol.
tl;dr - I don't think you're just [depressed person]. You're so much more than that, and that's something I didn't need to read your posts to know. It's not easy to suddenly believe the other parts of you are worth sharing too, but I think that's going to stand in the way of friendship more than anything. I really hope this wasn't preachy, but feeling confused about social stuff feels so isolating and you saying you deserved it couldn't be further from the truth.
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I don't know anyone on here IRL, we just have little silly back and forths. As for people I do know in the real, I only recently made my first queer friends and had my first queer romance. And besides those queer friends I don't really see anyone else because I moved very far away from my hometown. It took a significant effort to go against my introvert tendencies and extremely high fear of rejection to reach out to people and make a single connection, which eventually led to meeting more people through them. I had quite a few failed dates and months of just laying around feeling like shit before anything started working. You absolutely deserve community and since I don't know your situation all I can recommend is going to queer/trans events in your area (if they exist) or events for hobbies you have (nerdier ones often have quite a few queer/trans people). I was a depressed guy as personality person for like 16 years and coming out and specifically seeking out queer and trans community has basically saved my life.
This is also a very slow time on this site. The amount of posting has gone way down because of, I'm assuming, the holidays and school being out.
fwiw
i've only been here for like a week so it'd be ridiculous for me to expect to already feel or be ingrained in the space... but i definitely feel the not really knowing how to proceed. both off and online social bonds and connections always just kinda happened around me, i kinda just got pulled in by proximity, so i also don't really feel i ever got those skills of building new bonds. the reason i'm here is because i don't really have community elsewhere in a time where i really need it. i never ever really did reddit or tumblr or anywhere else so the ecosystem as a whole is kinda foreign to me, or what i'm even expecting here. i just kinda post and hope i'm maybe helpful or not interrupting and maybe i won't eternally exude that I'm New Here o_o;
idk if i have a point... maybe like, not really understanding where or how to fit in in a space, even if your brain is maybe like "you should belong and feel safe in this space," isn't a crazy feeling? it's an okay feeling to have?
idk if that's helpful or even cogent at all... feeling like a drifting rando solidarity i guess? o_o;
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Totally valid to feel that way, some people in trachat are literally dating and some people have been around here or on the old subreddit for literal years (like 5+ years). I can see how it feels so lonely and like everyone's doing there thing.
What would building social bonds on hexbear look like to you? Would you want people to comment on your posts? You get a lot of upbears, does it feel like that's not enough? Ideally, what would you like to happen? Did you need people to check in on you more often or commiserate when you have bad days? These are totally non judgemental questions, I just want to gauge how you're feeling and what you would like.
If you're comparing yourself and your experience to what you perceive other peoples' to be and feel like you're falling short, I'd say don't. It's just not healthy - it's not good for you to be comparing. If what you think you're being isolated - intentionally or not - that's something else. For me, hexbear feels more like screaming into a swirling void with the occasional answer back (which works fine for me).
I recognize some people by the PFPs and sometimes by name, but when people change their pics or start a new account they might as well be brand new. I do feel a little guilty about it but a lot of people here are more like an undifferentiated mass rather than a sea of individuals to me. A lot of social bonds specific to hexbear I experience feel very light because the general attitude for a long time was these people could dissappear at any moment (new account, just drop away, ban, the user just had less time, etc). That might not be your or the average persons experience, it's just how it feels. I don't feel this way about my friends and acquaintances in real life because those are more legible and less likely to ghost or suddenly vanish because I know them through my own friend groups, through work, volunteering, groups, etc so I can always catch up with someone and ask "hey what's up, whyd we stop talking?"
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Do you mean like friends with each other on the site, or that everyone has some kind friends or support network irl?
If you're talking about the site, then tbh I think lots of times people just upbear and move on thinking that they're supporting you that way. I completely get that sometimes the silence can be really deafening, especially if you're going through something really intense and post as a cry for help. In my personal opinion, I'd see the upbears gone. I think people would be much more inclined to respond instead of scrolling past and doing nothing if they didn't have a low effort middle option.
As someone who's been very very depressed (and worse) for around 15 years now, I've noticed that people generally avoid depressed people and ignore what they have to say. I've had someone tell me before that they're afraid that if they spend more time with me, I'll give them depression. I think a lot of it comes down to the stigma around mental health - once you're mentally unwell you're seen as sick, irrational, mad even. Often when I would pour out my heart to someone they would play it off by saying something like "oh you're just depressed, it's not really like that". And it can even come from people who are supposedly for talking about mental health more openly, but usually have some kind of corporate-HR-training version of mental health in mind and don't know what to do when they have to deal with an actual person who's going through some shit. It's really tough and I still don't know fully how to handle it or deal with it. Sometimes I just wanna scream in someone's face about how much of a dehumanising prick they're being, and I have done that, but that's usually when people bail and I'm left feeling hysterical.
But as a general tip, I think it's best to move away from "depressed" being your defining trait. I promise you that you are so much more than that, even if it's hard to see it that way. I've notoced people tend to gravitate towards people who already love themselves and think they're cool. It's kinda wild, but if you genuinely think you're cool, people will see that in you and see it too. As someone with really intense social anxiety I find that quite insufferable, because I cannot possibly come off that way in a social setting...
I feel this way so much, a lot of the time without even realising at all, but it affects the way I treat myself and approach life in general. Just recently I'm trying really hard to be kinder to myself, because it really seems like there is no outside help, at least not the way our society is structured right now. Someone suggested that whenever I think something horrible about myself, I should imagine saying it to my child self. It's not something I'm used to quite yet, but there have been a few times where doing that pulled me out of a really hateful thought spiral, so I thought I'd suggest it.
Recently I've been thinking a lot about how I can embody optimism and positivity and I find it's a helpful frame to think about this stuff through. Because if I'm not embodying optimism, then I'm embodying defeat and at that point it already feels like I'm dead (in a spiritual sense) or that I might as well be dead. It helps somewhat to think that all the brutal and horrific policies that we see passed, and all the fearmongering about trans people we see in the culture is meant to make you feel exactly like that - if you've given up on yourself then they've already acheived their goal, because you've been neutralised and won't resist. So then what does it look like to embody optimism? Start with the assumption that you're worth fighting for and loving and go from there - maybe it means you do something for yourself that you enjoy, or even get angry at someone for not seeing you the way you see yourself. It's obviously much easier said than done, and it doesn't really make things easier in the short term, but embodying hope will eventually push you into spaces and people who see you for who you are and support you.
It's still unbelievably hard though... I find that I still have to often convince the people closest to me that I'm worth caring about, which feels so dehumanising and sometimes can send me down a whole depression spiral in and of itself...
I find it really hard to separate this next thought from the really toxic capitalist culture of "pull yourself up by your bootstraps", but at the end of the day, you're always going to be the most responsible for advocating for your needs because you know them best. And if you won't do it, then how can anyone else know what you need? Don't give up on yourself, I promise you're worth it.
I hope I'm not overstepping, but I get a sense that you might be autistic, have you ever looked into it before? I'm not just getting that from that one sentence, but the way I've seen you express yourself in a few different comments makes my
spideyauti senses tingle a little. If so, it could be quite a helpful lens to understand what's going on inside you. I certainly found it helpful once I started unpacking it and the couple of people I'm close to nowadays are neurodiverse in similar ways to me.Idk this is a big rambly post, but if even a couple sentences from it are helpful then I'll consider it a job well done. Hang in there bud
Tbh I worry it'll rub off on them too :sadness:
I mean I'm no expert, but the way I see it is that if you're genuinely able to talk someone into a depression, then they were already depressed and just trying really hard to avoid it. Or they have enough privilege to avoid thinking about it, and blaming it on someone who's talking about it openly for bursting their avoidant bubble is just an asshole move.
i just want to say I really appreciated your post, thank you
who knew I had so much to say, took me like an hour to type that up x_x
but I'm glad it was worth it! (◕ᴗ◕✿)