It's precisely because the norms demarcating gender are so arbitrary that they must be policed so ruthlessly
I found a YouTube link in your comment. Here are links to the same video on alternative frontends that protect your privacy:
Reminds me of how weird my mom was when I said I wanted a strawberry cake for my birthday because it was pink. I just liked strawberry, I didn't care what color it was.
truly wild the extent to which people are policed on innocuous things like this. I remember when kids at school decided that liking bears was girly and boys could only like reptiles
gender purist (bears are gay) and activity purist (wrestling is gay): Khabib Nurmagomedov is gay
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mjfOeLQG9-M
I found a YouTube link in your comment. Here are links to the same video on alternative frontends that protect your privacy:
When you start seeing how much gender and especially binary thinking is so prevalent in society it's insane and kind of minimising in ways.
could she just like... make it like blue razzberry flavor but with strawberry?
I dunno, just one of those early things that didn't make sense to me as a kid. But then I did turn out to be kinda gay and genderqueer but I don't think pink frosting had anything to do with it. Or maybe it did 🤔
I've only ever had one birthday cake, chocolate, was sickening but I was I dunno 7 or 8 , memory stands out. I dunno, parents should do what their kids want and give them what they want for their birthday without scrutiny/ question (within reason ofc) kids should be made to feel special on their birthday, it's their special day after all
I used to work for a sports merchandise store and I regularly had women ask me if it was okay for their husbands to wear teal jerseys.
Like
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Your husband will not explode if he puts on a Jaguars or Mariners jersey.
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I love that my queer ass is the authority on cis-het masculinity. Like, yeah dude, teal is a manly color now. In fact, no one is talking about it, but so is fuchsia. Have you considered buying him a breast cancer awareness jersey?
Hockey men make me feel gay as hell, so there might be something there
BUt also!
San Jose has no fucking buisness having a hockey team. There's no ice. A hockey team on the west coast is just a flex that your city has at least 1 billionaire from the Midwest living in it.
fuchsia
Fuchsia = Koga's gym = Poison types = Feminine fighting style = Gay
Sorry
[Attack misses]
[Takes 7/16 of HP in toxic damage]
[Faints]
Lionel Messi, the guy everyone loves in soccer, and is largely seen as one of the greatest of all time, currently wears a pink jersey.
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I had some relatives question a woodland theme to toys and bedding for a baby boy. Lots of green and brown, plus some snails, rabbits, deer and shit.
CW hunting
In the end they rationalized it by saying they guess he can be a hunter. Now I'm wondering how many of the hunters I know just want to go camping but feel like it's too feminine if they aren't trying to kill anything
Most hunters I know just wanna hang out in a cabin and drink beers with the bros. Same goes for ice fishing.
My dad was a hunter for my entire childhood and he never shot a thing. He just liked having an excuse to enjoy the mid-late autumn wilderness.
spoiler
It was actually nice going on a couple trips with him and sitting in a completely silent forest early in the morning, quiet enough to hear the snow falling
Something something survival something something wilderness idk
What about Tarzan? Boy Scouts? Camping? Fucking hell, call it a dopamine detox and it's masculine enough. This shit's crazy. What, does it need tar and asphalt to be masculine? If you have too much tar and asphalt, you're too removed from nature and you must retvrn because city living has rotted your teeth and made you like EDM.
do boy like coloring
This one seems weird even by cis people standards
the standards are pretty weird and contradictory especially around the edges
for example it is unmasculine to be too educated but also "girls can't do maths". Women can't learn fractions but must be excelent cooks
both institutional sexism against female artists and "is it ok for a boy to like colouring"
for everything else the gender binary standards are they are also self contradictory gibberish
Food math is fucking hard. It's also not standardized, sometimes assumes all liquids have the same weight by volume as water etc. This is more of a professional thing than a home thing but twice a year I've gotta do food costing which means converting all this normal cooking shorthand to grams while making a typical version of each item so we know how much of how much goes into each so the cost can be broken down. On menu changes the other parts of the year i usually have to do the opposite and convert weight by gram based ingredient measurements to something people can use. The number crunching here can be something else. Me and a pal who are both very good at working through data made a streamlined formula, he's a former geologists and I'm an attempted geographer who is good at statistics, it still took some real ass effort between us. It was worth it cause we have a system down for each time and I can't complain a whole lot more than I normally do, he's a good dude who gave me a DS9 model kit out of the blue who actually has this responsibility while being paid what I do cause I can encourage he get a raise when I demand mine frequently but he's gotta come forward about it. I have his authority in a practical though non official sense and none of the responsibility, if I didn't make his life easier I'd be a bad person.
Used to be a baker. Now we do some. It's an Italian restaurant and our main thing is pizzas. It's fairly upscale and we do our dough and bread from scratch. When I was a baker I basically had to invent recipes myself cause the previous guy quit right as I came in and took everything with him. I hacked a lot of it out freestyle until I had solid recipes that i then followed like a religion unless I was feeling crafty
it is unmasculine to be too educated but also "girls can't do maths"
Nothing cranks my tractor quite as quickly as the idea of some over-educated soyjack complaining about a problem only for the wise redneck sage who Tells It Like It Is(TM) after a hard career of Making the Hard Decisions(TM) to come in and hit the TV with a wrench or turn it to W for Wumbo. It's so thought terminating and can easily and often be unhelpful.
there's also a class aspect to that (social not economic) as those standards don't exist for the upper class. Their masculinity doesn't demand ignorance
I can believe that, but I'm having a hard time envisioning what you're saying. Can you give me an example please?
boys who go to schools that were founded by Edward the 1st aren't shamed for poetry
almost certainly not the best example but dennis prager comes to mind for me. he's a manly man that smokes cigars and dresses in suits and what have you but he's also so "educated" that he's "qualified" to be an "educator".
Women can't learn fractions but must be excelent cooks
But also professional cooks are generally men
Yeah that just sounds like somebody who doesn't know anything about kids
creativity, colors, joy not immediately connected with violence, it just all seems a bit sus
The dumb thought process is coloring -> creating art -> being an artist -> artists are gay -> being gay is effeminate
They think people who create art are gay. It comes from the same place where men who actually care about their physical appearance are also gay.
I mean in my experience working with young kids, girls were more likely to pick coloring as a free time activity than boys. Some boys still would and obviously it's gendered. Probably in a subtle way but it's related to the socializing of "girls like crafts, boys run around."
This shit makes me so mad, even more so because I know that if I ever raised a son I couldnt stop other people from conditioning him this way
most of the bad ideas a young boy raised in a non toxic household is going to be exposed to are probably going to come from other boys their age. Shortly followed by the internet and then tv
providing a space where they can be vulnerable at home is from my childhood experience at least pretty helpful
Very true. I remember when i was a small boy i used to let my mom paint my nails because I thought it was cool. Then at the park one of the other boys sneered "only girls paint their nails" and I never wore nail polish again. But I doubt that behavior like this is innate in children
When I went to pick up a family friend's son from daycare a couple months ago, some of the boys had nail polish. They weren't being teased over it either. The kids are all right.
no they learned it from elsewhere in society. What I am saying is that you can't just remove a boy (or girl) from society and the negative ideas it will teach them. At least not completely
I know. Which makes me sad, because I want to protect kids from the harm the patriarchy inflicts on them. Shits just fucked, and like you said a good home environment where they can express themselves is really the best I can do on an individual level
the personal is political. Helping protect just one child from this is helping the grander society shift as well. Like water droplets that cut through stone helping enough individual people have better ideas can help shift the culture overall
In elementary school I remember a Friday when a girl was going around saying "does any BOY want his nails painted?"
The most gruff boy in the grade accepted, and got one hand pink and one hand purple. Walked around the rest of the afternoon with a very proud smile on his face. In retrospect it was glorious.
You should try it again, see if you like it now that you're grown, nobody to tell you off this time
As you mentioned the internet, specifically YouTube is really precarious for falling down any number of incredibly brainstormed rabbit holes.
I feel crazy wondering if the kids dressing up as Disney characters while their parents film are about to launch into a Prager u lecture.
Andrew Tate especially should not have access to kids and it is deeply irresponsible and fucked up to allow a human traficker and groomer access to impressionable children
and what he's doing is very much grooming
"Oh yeah yeah you're right Sharon, play food is for women and the gay, OK here." drops loaded snubnosed revolver on the counter
Okay but can we talk about hot pink 9mm pistols? When you want to kill but you want to he femme about it
All of the extremely pink sporterised Mosins and shit... even random .22 boltguns... I just cannot...
As a parent of little kids I am now one million percent convinced all of this gendered “girls naturally like pink and ponies and boys naturally like blue and dinos” is utter nonsense. I try as best I can to just let my kids explore whatever they want and they do not fall along any of these gendered lines.
But ultimately, it feels like a losing battle since everyone in my life (partner included) as well as all of society is fighting against me on this. As my kids have gotten older I can already see how they are
fallingbeing pushed into gendered interests. But I know it’s not some organic interest. I can draw the lines and point to how they get so much societal push on these things.This is why a few more radical parents dont reveal their childrens AGAB to others. It comes with its own set of challenges, I'm sure, but I sure wish I had a little more space from cisnormativity growing up
It doesn't help that children are super primed to perceive and understand gender, kind of like how they are with language.
Seen a lot of people who don't think kids are that smart, inquisitive or can grasp concepts and things like that. Some people have problems themselves being ignorant and reluctant to learn and project it I guess, would explain that line of thinking
I dropped my kid off at a day care camp for 1 evening and the first thing the counselors did was separate boys from girls in two lines
I worked at a GameStop briefly. One time had a lady customer ask me if we could exchange a game in a Wii box for a PS2 box since her son in the military might think the white box is too feminine
BEWARE: An object’s ability to reflect certain wavelengths of light has the direct effect of permanently altering your child’s gender identity with repeat exposure.
That's why you're not supposed to look at the sun, it's too much concentrated gender
Fun fact: In most Roman languages that assign genders to inanimate objects (that I know of), the Sun is usually male (le soleil, el sol, il sole) and the Moon female (la lune, la luna). In German it's the opposite for some reason, the Sun is female (die Sonne) and the Moon male (der Mond).
In German, the Sun is trans. Pass it on.
The sun produces oppressive heat in Southern Europe, it is a rare sight in Northern Europe. Cultural connotations of masculinity being harsh and femininity being comforting.
As a goth with translucent skin you learn to avoid the sun, I avoid the sun like the plague lol
But think of all the gender you're missing out on, you could be like a queer kryptonian
I mean I started trans femme, and recently realised trans femme non binary (transbian enby) :) I absorb the darkness instead it's what fuels me. That and I burn easily lol
This would be fuckin awesome, just stare at specific objects to try on another gender identity for a day?
I remember being a kid and my dad refusing to let me buy a Jigglypuff stuffie because "It's pink"
Well, guess what daddy, I have like ten of them now
a customer remind me she was buying a gift for a boy when I suggested play food
COMMUNISMCISGENDER MALE = NO FOODGay to cook? Absolutely
Gay to eat? Extremely
Gay to even own food? 100% flaming homosexual
Gay to know food exists? Arguably
a customer telling her daughter she can't give out ice cream stickers because there will be boys at the party
wait a minute... if boys can't have ice cream... then what's the deal with all those memes about Joe Biden eating ice cream???
Joe Biden trans woman confirmed
No they aren't and I see this shit all the time at work. Dudes always pull up with their big ass pickup trucks bragging about how big and intimidating their car is. Refuse to touch electric cars or anything smaller than an SUV because "only queers and women drive those"
I've seen it firsthand. They made a big deal about how it was bulletproof and resembled a tank.
Dude, my truck is like a tank!
Dude, your truck has a high center of balance
:pikmin-carry-l:
Your Truck
Yea those dumb shits are the reason American pickup trucks are completly fucking useless, cost $90k and get 7 miles to the gallon.
Stupid fucking land tanks can't even drive in the snow and have a fucking 4 foot bed to boot.
Gimme a tiny truck with the bare minimum amount of electronics in it God damn it.
