When China does well it is because the athlete's families are all being held hostage by the ebil SEESEEPEE and that is why they have to train 27/8 because clearly the Asian skull doesn't have the required shape necessary to swim very well, run very fast or lift some pretty heavy weights. I kid you not I heard some very disturbing stories too did you know if you can't win a medal they send your family to a concentration camp? Have your heard about [insert Uyghur mispelling]? Crazy shit man that is why HK/Taiwan wants freedom.

When Russia does well it is because Putin personaly issues a prescription of 146326 drugs to each and every teenager so they grow up addicted and can't help but take drugs, oh you don't want to hurt daddy Putin's feelings, I mean they'd be completely hopeless otherwise right? I mean when was the last time Russia won anything would cheating? The soviets were clearly cheating too, we just didn't have the technology to detect it at the time, like you seriously believe a third world country could win so many medals without cheating?

When the US/UK/Ger/JP/AUS etc does well it is of course because we are all extremely patriotic hard working people who would never ever cheat ever because... because FREEDOM baby yeah because we are better than everyone else of course why would you cheat when you are just born better than everyone else duh. No but I mean seriously when was the last time one of our athletes was caught cheating?